Had a quick look, and you’re right, the Men’s Sheds are closed right now. But I don’t know if he needs a reset first - obviously you know the man, and I don’t, but I know a friends Dad found it just brilliant. He went very downhill after his wife died, very withdrawn and shutting himself off, his kids visiting more but he’d no interest in engaging.
The Sheds really gave him a new lease of life. He ended up having so many activities that he was directly involved in, or through friends from the Sheds, that my friend used to have to arrange a time to see him when he was free, which was a total turnaround. So I wouldn’t put off suggesting that until your neighbour is a bit more centred. It could be the nudge that he needs. The website says that they’re campaigning to reopen in Sept.
(excellent suggestion from Darc, I’d forgotten about it until that post)
this is definitely something he would love but mayb further down the line - need to get him back to baseline 1st i'd say.. must check if they are even back up n running - I am sure there is one in this area.. its almost city centre
If there's a men's shed in the area, it could be a good social outlet.
https://menssheds.ie/
Hi Guys thanks for all the replies.. UPDATE: lets call him "John" - he went to see the GP - referring him to Psych - we shall see how things go.. referring him for an MRI too as he has a major back issue.. John is delighted that the ball is rolling.. I am mindful of the fact that I am not family.. I don't wanna get too involved if you know what I mean... I hope to just be able to keep the lines of communication open between him and services.. I have elderly loved ones of my own (parents) - am flat out with them also.. xxx
Don't invite him to your place or he'll expect it all the time. Get him help through the appropriate services or you will soon become angry.
If you still think he needs help there are local Primary Care Social Workers in every catchment area who can help with the lifestyle issues, coping skills and with practical supports. Details on HSE website.
Well done for being such an advocate for your neighbour and for being so kind.
hi all, here's an update on the situation with my neighbour.. the PHN was not v helpful.. apparently tried ringing him but got no answer.. rang me and asked why I didn't contact GP!! trying to pass the buck.. she said she would call to his house but he says she hasn't.. he was getting meals on wheels but stopped it as he doesn't like the food - think its cos he's use to junk food - but his situation has gotten worse - not leaving the hse at all etc.. so have rang his GP (with his permission) - told him the story., GP says he prob needs in patient treatment - he's seeing him Thursday - neighbour is delighted.. says he feels powerless at the mo.. so fingers crossed for him.. thanks again all
Honestly, I'm touched by your story and commend your compassion and care for this clearly vulnerable gentleman. Alone will certainly be able to offer guidance. I just wondered would it be an idea to see if the local Garda station have a community garda, they did trojan work during the pandemic, they could call on your neighbor and use complete discretion.
It's hard enough to to help a family member in difficulty so I can imagine how difficult this situation is.
I wish you both well, I'm sure assistance will be offered.
What about meals on wheels they would call every day with a meal anda cheery hello or home help? All these poor devils need is a few words of chat a newspaper and a hot meal to make them feel better. A nice gentle home help person would go a long way.
SunnySundays wrote: » Fair play OP, your involvement says a lot about you as a person. Many wouldn't be as kind and thoughtful. I know there's a balance and he's receptive to it at the moment but maybe at a late stage you could consider introducing him to The Men's Shed. It seems to me a very good idea and it gives people an opportunity to be involved, meet you people, get out of the house and reduce loneliness. Probably not possible until covid restrictions are lifted but he might meet a lot of others experiencing similar.
SusanC10 wrote: » Just read this thread now and was going to suggest PHN. Just want to say well done for caring and sorting it out without offending. Have had some family experience of this in an elderly widower with no kids. Difference was, he was very resistant to any form of assistance.
sporina wrote: » Made contact with the PHN for his area.. delighted - thanks everyone for all your help.. joint effort... and PS: feel ok about it all as I got his permission - I rang him in advance to ask him if it would be ok if I sourced a PHN for him - said yes.. (I used his sore feet as an excuse :pac: a good way for the PHN to get a foot in the door {pardon the pun} and establish/address all his needs without him knowing the full extent of my concerns {so no risk of offending him})
iamwhoiam wrote: » You can phone the local health centre and ask who is the PHN for your address Tell them you need to get in touch about a vulnerable eldery person
sporina wrote: » ok - i dunno who the PHN is for the area but I can ask his GP surely - he'll know - thanks
Tom Mann Centuria wrote: » Yeah PHN would be my first port of call, they might also link in with Community Psychiatric Nurse if he's known to their service.
iamwhoiam wrote: » You could get in touch with the Public Health nurse for the area . Make her aware of a vulnerable elderly person in her catchment . Ask her to call to see him regarding his entitlements etc He might be entitled to home help or other help . She would be his contact for any day care facilities etc . You could also try Meals on Wheels and if they could help him with meals
Musefan wrote: » Could you consider contacting your local safeguarding team with regards a concern for his neglect of his health- see https://www.safeguardingireland.org/reporting/
Jequ0n wrote: » I didn't mean it as an offense. But if the OP turns into the only graspable point of contact they are doomed with this old person
HalfAndHalf wrote: » Well that ****e on my idea so.
Jequ0n wrote: » Don't invite him around or else he'll expect it all the time. Get him help via adequate services or else you will grow resentful soon.
sporina wrote: » scary isn't it? so many people in the world yet so many alone
Thelonious Monk wrote: » Fair play Sporina, I don't have any advice but it's nice to see you're doing something for this man, a lot of men seem to end up in this situation and no one knows they exist or cares.
