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Digging a grave

duffysfarm

Not a farming issue as such but more of a rural thing so may this may be the best forum to post. Was at a funeral lately and the topic of who dug the grave came up. For a lot of the funerals round here a bunch of neighbours will dig the grave. Its not to save money or anything, its more like a tradition and a sign of respect. In one way i can see less people doing it but i think its a good tradition. Does this happen in many other parts of the country? Whatever about it happening in the countryside i cant see it happening in towns as much

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Dunedin

Very strong tradition around these parts (Offaly). If it’s a Saturday dig and a fairly popular individual, you’d have up to 40 people there. The family will send tea and sandwiches and both beer and whiskey too.

even on a mid week dig, close neighbors and friends will take a day off work for the grave digging.

it’s a lovely tradition which I hope continues.

Jb1989

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058201076/digging-a-grave

Happens in 3 small parishes in our county. The rest is done by 2 or so graveing digging teams. Me being part of one team.

jimini0

A few villages do it around here. Our own parish has 2 grave diggers. If people want to help them dig it they have no problem. My uncle died 7 years ago and I gathered up the cousins and a couple of neighbours and we dug it. That started out family tradition. 6 family members have have died so we all know now to get ready to dig . My cousin's dug my brother's grave 3 years ago and my father's grave in October. It's tradition to drop down beer but no immediate family is allowed to dig. It's a lovely thing to do it's only a few hours(unless you come across a few boulders).

Base price

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117670775#Comment_117670775

It's also a strong tradition around here. If someone in the area dies a few neighbours work out who is going to dig the grave. Some people may only be available for a couple of hours in the morning, at lunch time etc. The grave diggers get tea, sandwiches, beer and whiskey and on the day of the funeral they are invited to the meal afterwards in the local hotel. It's a far cry to when my Mam died in 2018 - she was buried in Glasnevin Cemetery and they charged (from memory) €1200 to open and close the grave. A lot of city/town graveyards are now controlled by the local County Council and they will not allow anyone other than CC employees to open/close a grave. Apparently it's due to possible litigation issues 😥

wotzgoingon

I used to dig graves but at night hoping a ring or bracelet would be still on the person.

They can pry it from my cold dead fingers. Is what the dead person used to say when alive so I done the honours.

A2LUE42

North Tipp. Country area. Family and friends dig the grave. Nice tradition and long may it continue. Nearby in Limerick city it is controlled by the council and not allowed.

Kevhog1988

Is tradition here for some to dig the grave in north kildare alright. Tradition in my family to backfill it also. Not sure where it came from but wehave done it for every funeral i remember

kefflin

Yeah still a nice tradition around here, although new graveyard seems to be harder dug. So maybe it might die out.

_Brian

Kinda dying out (excuse the pun) round these parts. Most dug by digger where possible.

reminds me. When my mam died earlier in the year I had to meet the grave diggers to confirm the grave. Local bachelors, one has land backing onto ours. Wee chat about mam dying and about how long my dad was dead. They asked which side of the grave was free and I honestly couldn’t remember. “No matter” he says “we’ll stick down a crowbar and find your auld fella” I laughed but my brother who was with me was horrified.

Tileman

It’s nearly extinct here now the last 10 years or so. There are two or three grave diggers with little diggers who do it all. Pity as it was a nice tradition but bloody hard work I’d say. Maybe when you have a team it mightn’t be as bad but I wouldn’t fancy it on some of our land.

nklc

Mid Tipp , never saw less than a dozen people dig in our parish ,mostly farmers . All across to the pub for a few pints and sandwiches. Most rural parishes do the same around here but not all .

kollegeknight

Always did it here- since the new graveyard. They are trying to stop it and get a mini digger to do it.

last one I dug was about 2 years ago in Tipp for my uncle. Met cousins I hadn’t met in ages and had a great chat.

remember years ago digging a grave for my aunt and met my grandfathers remains on the way down. My younger brother nearly fainted,

Lime Tree Farm

I shed tears today when I visited the family grave and shocked to see the grave had sunk about a foot. It's going to be difficult to top up with soil, it's an old graveyard with a narrow gate entrance. My late mother's words ringing in my ears, a collapsed grave is beckoning a funeral.

Jb1989

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117671012#Comment_117671012

For your area. Would yous have one a week?

Jb1989

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117671206#Comment_117671206

A wheel barrow and a handful of bags of soil will sort that easily line tree. Don't fret about the superstition.

Cavanjack

Still goes on here but the priest has said that the insurance companies are going to put a stop to it.

Lime Tree Farm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117671237#Comment_117671237

Yes I was thinking wheelbarrow also after I had posted. It was just such a shock to see.

If I stop posting you'll know where I am.

Anto_Meath

It would be a mix around here, I ve been at the digging of a few, mostly older traditional families the grave would be dug, but for families that have moved into the area in the last 50 years or so it generally dug by a mini digger. Would have dug a few in the neighbouring parish 4 mile down the road, it's amazing the different in ground. Its all boulders and a very hard yellow soil..

DBK1

Very common around here (Offaly) as said earlier. There would generally be a decent crowd of mainly local farmers along with a few family members. I’d help out on a regular enough basis and would have dug in about 6 different graveyards around here. 99% of them are filled in straight after the burial when family and all are still there and a lot of people would join in.

Birr is the only place I know of where the council are in charge of it and dig them all. I’ve no problem with that but they don’t allow family and friends to fill the grave which around here wouldn’t be accepted. I know my grandparents and father would have come back up again after us if they thought we hadn’t filled them in.

My own immediate family all know that whenever my time comes, no matter what the “rules” are in the graveyard at that time, they are to be there to see me being filled in.

It’s also amusing as well to watch some of the family members that turn up who are not from farming background and have no clue how to even hold a shovel! Especially the 20 or 30 something year old gym goers with all the pumped up muscles. Watching them wilt when faced with actual work makes the work worthwhile for us that’s used to being there!!

duffysfarm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117671240#Comment_117671240

if some one were to make a claim for something that happened while digging a grave then they should be thrown under the coffin

Kevhog1988

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117671219#Comment_117671219

one funeral a week? Not sure what youre asking there

olestoepoke

I think this is a wonderful tradition and long may it continue, as long it's done safely and we don't end up burying anyone before their time.

Lime Tree Farm

The strangest one I've seen, was a female Council gravedigger. Holding a shovel, dressed in a boiler suit, waiting for the people to disperse. She was part of team, but she drew attention.

thejuggler

For those who dig graves regularly what’s the criteria for when previous remains are encountered? Some local authorities recommend that their staff use a rod to detect a previous coffin and leave a certain depth of soil covering this. However I imagine in some cases there would be little trace of the coffin remaining so it’s quite likely that only bones would be found. In the US most cemeteries require a grave liner or vault which is a concrete box that protects the coffin from collapse and the elements. Doesn’t prevent decay of course but the cemeteries like them as it also reduces grave subsidence. I’m surprised that they were never introduced here.

DBK1

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117672490#Comment_117672490

It does happen on occasion. Depending on the depth you come on them there are a few different approaches.

If you meet remains in the first few feet and it’s a double grave or bigger it could be filled in and start again in a different position on the plot.

If you’re down 5 or 6 feet the remains would be collected, the grave would be dug 6 inches deeper than the required depth, the remains placed back in and covered over for the new coffin to be placed on top. Generally the priest would be asked to come to bless the disturbed remains also.

Jb1989

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117672598#Comment_117672598

5 foot is well deep enough, apart from certain graveyards, that the order is to go three coffin deep.

A lot of the grave diggers in the past were only too mad to get ripping the lid of a previous coffin open to get a nose at the corpse.

If fairly fresh remains are their previous, its tasteless, to be takeing them out, to put the new remains at the same depth, with the blessing of a priest or not.

There is still plenty of land in the country with out exhuming the dead unnecessarily.

148multi

Have been at the digging of a good few graves, the first when I was a teen.

Was amazed at the ritual of it, have come across bones of deceased, reburied under the grave or at foot of the coffin. Recent years the grave of my grand father reopened for a family member, he was buried in 77 and casket was still almost perfect.

It was the deceased wish to be buried in the same grave, so it's not for the want of land but to try and respect all wishes.

We just lined the grave and covered the casket in palm so none of the close family would be upset.

Have been in a couple of tricky situations, always good to have a runner with a direct line to the undertakers, you never know when you might need to slow down a burial or speed one up, and this has to be done without the family knowing.

You can't let a family arrive to a subsided grave with the perhaps the coffin of a parent or sibling lying exposed in the next grave.

I have seen graves that were full, but not used in a few generations.

You'd have auld fella's guessing who they were by the length of the bones.

I think it shows respect and if asked must never refuse.

Have a local knowall that views all grave digging, was one which he was saying was never used when we happen on a replacement hip, sometimes it can be very funny too.

DBK1

It’s the undertaker that gives the instructions on how deep to go, and he gets that info from the family. The decision is based on the size of the plot and the amount of people the family wish to have in the plot. It’s not a decision the diggers get to make and it’s not a decision the diggers question as you are only there to help out a neighbouring family in their time of need.

There would never be “fairly fresh” remains as there would always be someone in the family that will be reasonably accurate as to where previous corpse were put.

It’s generally in older plots that weren’t dug in a long time where you come on remains and you can only deal with that in the most appropriate way possible at the time then.

Edit to add: Also JB1989 after reading your comment again I’d just like to add that I don’t know what type of people are in your area that dig graves but I’ve dug a lot of grave’s in the last 25 to 30 years and I’ve never once met the type of person you describe trying to rip open the lid of a previous corpse for a look. That wouldn’t be tolerated around here and it’s not something I’ve ever heard of happening. Maybe it’s time to find new grave diggers in your parish.

patsy_mccabe

If anything the tradition is getting bigger around here in East Clare. The last few here, had more than enough lads. The tradition here is that the immediate family members, sons or brothers etc, don't dig or close the grave. The family will supply drink (beer and whiskey) and food. Local tradition dictates that the whiskey bottle shouldn't leave the graveyard. A good excuse to finish it off. 😀 The man is usually buried on the left as you face the headstone, wife on the right. This helps in future years deciding which side to bury next. A bit of rebar works too, as it can be easily pushed down on the previously dug side. I wish they would mark the headstone in some way to show which side the person is buried on. A simple dot left or right would do.

I must have dug 20 graves by now. i remember being the youngest years ago and now I'm fast becoming the oldest. It's a great tradition and I hope it continues. I asked a cousin's husband what he thought after he dug his first grave (my aunt's) and he said that he thought it very personal. Some of the older lads here put great care and pride into digging it neatly and will line the sides with laurels or even flowers for a child's.

Anto_Meath

Years ago when I was a teenager, a neighbor died, he was the last of a large family all buried in the family plot. The gave was finished the evening of the removal but the sides were poor from been dug so often. The top of the gave was planked but after much debate among the older heads it was decided against planking the sides of the grave. Morning of the funeral as we gathered in the church yard the undertaker arrives in a panic, the sides had fallen in. So a few of us headed up to dig out it out again, it was some mess, by the time we had the clay taken out you could have placed the coffin in the gave any way you wanted, lucky it was only about 5ft deep. So we planked it all around again and as the hearse was pulling in the gate we were trying to fix up the green mats, the priest came up to us and said I heard ye had a bit of handling so we used the bad weather to have the sympathising in Church.. lucky they did or the coffin would have had to sit in the hearse for awhile.