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Carbonara sauce is a scam

Ubbquittious

Just fukk a pack of bacon lardons into a frying pan and slosh a bit of cream over it. Tastes way nicer too

Same with pancake mix, this is only powdered egg and self raising flour and a load of synthetic chemicals to lengthen the ingredient list to make it look like a very complex product that took a lot of R&D.

What other cooking product is a scam?

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ozmo

Heard a story - that when they started making cake mix etc in the 50's - that a decision was made to omit powered eggs - for the only reason that the people cooking it would feel like they weren't cheating using mix if they got to crack their own egg in.

Leg End Reject

[Deleted User] wrote: »

And don't forget the fcuking mushrooms!!

And guacamole.

murpho999

Ubbquittious wrote: »

Tastes good though

Not really.
It's used be people who want shortcuts and don't want to do it the proper way with egg yolks.

It's funny when you see restaurants here claiming to be genuine Italian but on their menu they have cream in the carbonara.
Turns me off the whole menu then.

Zaph

Deleted User wrote: »

And don't forget the fcuking mushrooms!!

You could make it easier for yourself if you just use a tin of cream of mushroom soup instead.

[Deleted User]

awec wrote: »

These people, they're a lost cause. Don't eat their food, or if you do, be prepared to be surprised.

Yup, that's me. Can't resist adding a pile of extra's beyond what a dish is 'supposed' to be. Oddly enough though, I do get asked for second servings.

Leg End Reject

Zaph wrote: »

You could make it easier for yourself if you just use a tin of cream of mushroom soup instead.

A culinary revolution revealed right here!

Aidan Harney

And cream

[Deleted User]

Zaph wrote: »

You could make it easier for yourself if you just use a tin of cream of mushroom soup instead.

Perfect! Close the thread!

endacl

In exactly the same way as there’s no pineapple on pizza.

*runs away*

:pac:

Man Vs ManUre

Ubbquittious wrote: »

Just fukk a pack of bacon lardons into a frying pan and slosh a bit of cream over it. Tastes way nicer too

Same with pancake mix, this is only powdered egg and self raising flour and a load of synthetic chemicals to lengthen the ingredient list to make it look like a very complex product that took a lot of R&D.

What other cooking product is a scam?

Lol on the pancakes. I been watching these YouTube gym muppets, out of curiosity of how they make a living if anything else. It’s bizarre how some of them seem to do so well. Big trips to Dubai, Ibiza, Mykonos, Bali, Maldives (in a pandemic year!!) is a normal year. This 1 Irish fella who is well known, been going on for past few months about his project X, that he has pumped a load of money into and was keeping shush on what it was. His big product launch happened last week, and his product is “fuel cakes”, a protein pancake mix. Does this crap seriously make money?? This wouldn’t be picked on the apprentice. Only the sheep that follow these muppets and call everyone ‘bro’ will buy this overpriced crap. Puke cakes.

WoollyRedHat

If you want really good pasta, get the one that grows on trees, so fresh and delicious!

Zaph

endacl wrote: »

In exactly the same way as there’s no pineapple on pizza.

*runs away*

:pac:

Ah here now, we'll have no more of that sort of crazy talk. :mad:

Ubbquittious

Man Vs ManUre wrote: »

Lol on the pancakes. I been watching these YouTube gym muppets, out of curiosity of how they make a living if anything else. It’s bizarre how some of them seem to do so well. Big trips to Dubai, Ibiza, Mykonos, Bali, Maldives (in a pandemic year!!) is a normal year. This 1 Irish fella who is well known, been going on for past few months about his project X, that he has pumped a load of money into and was keeping shush on what it was. His big product launch happened last week, and his product is “fuel cakes”, a protein pancake mix. Does this crap seriously make money?? This wouldn’t be picked on the apprentice. Only the sheep that follow these muppets and call everyone ‘bro’ will buy this overpriced crap. Puke cakes.

Yes this stuff sells. These protein bars are a huge market. Lots of youngsters now flee the nest not knowing how to cook themselves a dinner and modern society with its abundance of pre-packaged stuff and restaurants mean they can stay in this state for a lot longer. You also have the too-rich-to-care market as well who think nothing of spending 3 or 4 quid on a little bar with only two mouthfulls in it.

Print a nice spunky label and a bit of bullsh1t about how much nutritious goodness is packed in and you'll be rolling in it as long as your outsourced manufacturing facility keeps up the good work

Mam of 4

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

If you want really good pasta, get the one that grows on trees, so fresh and delicious!

Absolutely , and in your own garden too , priceless!

[Deleted User]

Alfredo sauce is lovely though, to be fair to the OP.

WoollyRedHat

Mam of 4 wrote: »

Absolutely , and in your own garden too , priceless!

Yes, but the crop hasn't been great this year unfortunately, the slugs can't keep away from it.

Tork

Dammit 2020. You are the gift that keeps on giving

Leg End Reject

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

Yes, but the crop hasn't been great this year unfortunately, the slugs can't keep away from it.

Greenfly destroyed mine this year.

WoollyRedHat

Leg End Reject wrote: »

Greenfly destroyed mine this year.

Oh really that's a shame. Greenfly actually makes an excellent basil substitute, mixed in with a bit of garlic, my guests loved it.

gozunda

Leg End Reject wrote: »

Greenfly destroyed mine this year.

No no its whitefly on pasta. Greenfly is pesto!

ShatterAlan

Ubbquittious wrote: »

Just fukk a pack of bacon lardons into a frying pan and slosh a bit of cream over it. Tastes way nicer too

Same with pancake mix, this is only powdered egg and self raising flour and a load of synthetic chemicals to lengthen the ingredient list to make it look like a very complex product that took a lot of R&D.

What other cooking product is a scam?

Thanks for the vomit lesson.

What's your next culinary masterpiece? A bottle of ketchup into a saucepan, generously dowsed with pepper, slopped over spaghetti hoops.....bingo.....pasta arrabiata?

unkel

Tork wrote: »

Paolo (Tullio) ...reserved a special scorn for carbonara made with cream. In his book Paolo Tullio Cooks Italian he writes of this simple dish with a kind of missionary zeal (but is a bit hazy on quantities).

So, the day after Paolo died, I decided to make his version of spaghetti carbonara, taking careful measurements as I went along. So, now I can share Paolo’s recipe in a fairly easy-to-use way.

If that was really in his recipe, then Paolo Tullio was either a gobsh1te or he wanted to make carbonara more accessible to philistines with limited access to ingredients. I suspect the latter.

There is no cream in carbonara
There is no mushrooms in carbonara
There is no parmesan in carbonara
There is no bacon in carbonara

Rick Stein nails it here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9hu9B35fYI

Leg End Reject

So a recap on all the advice so far:

Lots of cream
Lots of mushrooms
Substitute the above with cream of mushroom soup for extra authenticity
Fatty pig cheek made from guacamole
Pasta from the pasta trees in your back garden - protect these from slugs, greenfly or possibly whitefly

There's still some debate on parmesan but you can't go wrong with loads of red pepper added to the mix.

[Deleted User]

dasdog wrote: »

Jesus - I'd forgotten about that. Congealed bile from El Paso in a jar.

Again, just make your own. Chopped shallots, avocado, garlic, jalapenos, chili, de-seeded tomatoes with a squeeze of lime juice and a crack of rock salt.

Getting hungry now.

pig cheek

[Deleted User]

Garlic in a carbonara...

tenor.gif?itemid=4517373

Porklife

My mom was quite the Nigella Lawson in her day. She used to make spaghetti and meatballs for us as kids by mixing a can of Campbells meatballs and a tin of heinz spaghetti together.
Such a perfectionist, she wouldn't dream of putting cream in carbonara.
Bellisimo!!

dasdog

unkel wrote: »

Rick Stein nails it here

I'm still not convinced he didn't cook and eat his dog Sparky.

[Deleted User]

dasdog wrote: »

I'm still not convinced he didn't cook and eat his dog Sparky.

Chalky.

storker

Aidan Harney wrote: »

And cream

When making a carbonara you make your own "cream" by adding some of the water from the pasta (which shouldn't be drained before adding). The water combined with the egg and oil from the pancetta makes the "cream".

ChikiChiki

**** it OP Carbonara tastes like cream so ball a jar of cream into a pot and whack a load of salt and pepper onto it.