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Strangers calling you 'my friend'?

Nykay

What do you think of strangers saying this to you? It could be something like "how are you my friend?" or "no problem my friend". I know it's not really Irish people who say it. I heard it said to me by a barber last I think.

When I hear it being said it kind of annoys me, because the person saying it thinks that it makes you feel good. But I think it's kind of deceptive. I just think to myself "we've never met before; if you want to be nice to me, you really don't have to pretend to be my friend".

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breezy1985

ablelocks wrote: »

until it is, and then you get a full account of how it is, in fact, going for them - and usually, it's not a good story.

"How are things" and "how are you" are phrases that should never be used round the literal minded English.

I used say it as a barman over and the reply would be pan account of their day followed by silence as they stare patiently as they wait for you to ask what drink they would like.
They couldn't understand the concept that the barman didn't actually care how things were.

kravmaga

That's like real Dubs saying, ah right Pal, Buddy, Bud, Lad, Dude(D4 Head types) and Mate (UK mainly).

Its a way to try and break the ice with a stranger, I would not read too much into it OP.

Could be worse, All right My Friend, Ya Bollix :-)

Church on Tuesday

Alright chuck.

WesternZulu

Probably better than being called 'scan' or 'sham' depending on what part of North Galway you find yourself.

Interested Bystander

I used to live in South Carolina, once you get called 'hot rod' by a middle aged man, anything is an improvement.

People being fake is one thing but if someone is being friendly and doesn't know what to call you, i'm everyone's buddy, pal, friend, mate or lad
Just don't call me dotey pet

Sardonicat

Interested Bystander wrote: »

Just don't call me dotey pet

Who calls you that!?

440Hertz

People just gave crutch words.

I know someone who calls me “Me ould segotia!”

Interested Bystander

Sardonicat wrote: »

Who calls you that!?

No-one thankfully, but i've heard it going around. *shootmyself in the face emoji*

Sardonicat

Interested Bystander wrote: »

No-one thankfully, but i've heard it going around. *shootmyself in the face emoji*

I thought you might have an older female friend with a soft spot for you. I was going to suggest doubling down on the boundaries!

John Frank Wilson

I don't particularly like this either, but I'm sure it's often meant in a friendly way. If someone says it to me, online we'll say... - I will reluctantly return it with a 'bud' or 'buddy', I couldn't bring myself to return with 'my friend', but I do understand they are just using 'my friend' the same way I am using 'buddy', in other words - to simply convey a bit of warmth in the conversation!

Conversely - I don't think I could utter the word 'buddy' out loud! Unless I was taking off Keith Duffy or something... I think I could however utter the word 'friend', but certainly not with the word 'my' attached, not to a stranger.

Autosport

440Hertz wrote: »

People just gave crutch words.

I know someone who calls me “Me ould segotia!”

I use that phrase

only for special people

breezy1985

Speak friend and enter

John Frank Wilson

440Hertz wrote: »

People just gave crutch words.

I know someone who calls me “Me ould segotia!”

I have a jumper I've worn so much that I call it 'Me auld Pal'. And it is just that, warm - friendly... warm - never lets you down, always there for me.

My auld pal the Jumper!

Hyperbollix

John Frank Wilson wrote: »

I have a jumper I've worn so much that I call it 'Me auld Pal'. And it is just that, warm - friendly... warm - never lets you down, always there for me.

My auld pal the Jumper!

U ok................

Hun?

John Frank Wilson

Hyperbollix wrote: »

U ok................

Hun?

I'm fine chick.

IAMAMORON

Listen Bud.

Sardonicat

IAMAMORON wrote: »

Listen Bud.

You leave my dotey pet alone, chum!

Deub

It is the same friend that some people have on Facebook. People that you met once and never saw or spoke again.

The Tetrarch

We have not been formally introduced.

Nodster

.........don't 'bro' me if ya don't know me

Aongus Von Bismarck

I hate when you go to a more causal restaurant in Ireland or the UK and the waiter/waitress calls you 'mate' or tells you to 'come this way folks'. It's far too relaxed for its own good, and I will often pull them up on it, or simply not leave a tip. Sir and Madam is the only way a waiter/waitress should refer to a customer.

chosen1

People who call you Friend, Pal, Bud or Buddy are rarely trying to be friendly in my experience.

Mister Vain

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

I hate when you go to a more causal restaurant in Ireland or the UK and the waiter/waitress calls you 'mate' or tells you to 'come this way folks'. It's far too relaxed for its own good, and I will often pull them up on it, or simply not leave a tip. Sir and Madam is the only way a waiter/waitress should refer to a customer.

Well maybe if you're dining in the 50's. Who the hell says Madam?

[Deleted User]

Those kind of things can be used passive-aggressively, but if it's meant kindly then I'll take it that way. There's nothing wrong with being warm and friendly in your dealings with others.

Alejandro68

I am guilty of using it when I have a connection with who I am conversating to. It is a form of endearment to me, I'm just confused why so many seem to take offense to it.

[Deleted User]

suicide_circus wrote: »

I don't agree. It's usually done in a manner to disguise (poorly) a certain level of aggression.

From your Barber?

[Deleted User]

Deleted User wrote: »

Steady on there petal, that door won't close itself.

Naughty step, ten minutes.

[Deleted User]

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

I hate when you go to a more causal restaurant in Ireland or the UK and the waiter/waitress calls you 'mate' or tells you to 'come this way folks'. It's far too relaxed for its own good, and I will often pull them up on it, or simply not leave a tip. Sir and Madam is the only way a waiter/waitress should refer to a customer.

Jesus Christ!

You won't leave a tip because a waiter didn't grovel? And then pull them up on it because they dared not recognize your knighthood?

I have news for you, your food is regularly spat in.

Aongus Von Bismarck

Mister Vain wrote: »

Well maybe if you're dining in the 50's. Who the hell says Madam?

Waiters working in restaurants where you aren't expected to sit at a bench with complete strangers or use a roll of kitchen towel to wipe your hands as you eat. If you've made a reservation then I've no issues with being referred to by my first name. It's this overly familiar mate/folks/guys that I have an issue with. It gets the meal off to a very bad start.

John Frank Wilson

Language is not black and white, gang. It's a nuanced shade of grey.