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Child Item

College and Gaming

John66

My son is about to start college and things are still a little up in the air about accomdation, money etc. I'm about an hour from cork and he wants to move out but so far I can't afford it and waiting until I get his time table as no point paying for accomdation if he is in only one day a week. The main thing is I have seen no interest from him getting any part time work or anything to assist us with paying for his new lifestyle apart from him emailing a few cv's to potential employers. In fact since he finished school earlier this year he has spent most of his time in his room playing computer games. His fascination and addiction to this form of entertainment seems to be increasing. I suppose like most teenagers he doesn't lift a finger at home and won't even empty the dishwasher unless asked and then it's a grumble but spends all his free time gaming. But I suppose the main thing I'm concerned about is him stating that if and when he leaves for college he wants to take his gaming system. And I'm thinking no way as what the f** with the amount of time you currently spend on it how can you study and work part time.

What are peoples opinion of students taking there gaming systems to college.

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Church on Tuesday

I'm not a big gamer but isn't gaming great for cognitive skills? Also some people make a living from it and the games industry is an absolute boon and has been thriving for some time.

Folk have their hobbies, as long as they are not harming anyone who ****ing cares?

ancapailldorcha

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

I'm not a big gamer but isn't gaming great for cognitive skills? Also some people make a living from it and the games industry is an absolute boon and has been thriving for some time.

Folk have their hobbies, as long as they are not harming anyone who ****ing cares?

Apparently, they can help with developing attention to detail and other cognitive functions though obviously, parents need to make sure that games are consumed in moderation. I'd expect that to be much more difficult nowadays given how scummy most publishers are.

Relating to the OP, the main problem I had with college was that I was free for the first time. I think it would have been better if I'd lived in Dublin for a year first, working in a shop or a pub to get that novelty out of my system.

Greyfox

Lots of people need to educate themselves about gaming, some ignorant comments in here already. it's a hobby just like watching films or sport or reading books. Yes a minority overdo it but pretty much every hobby has a minority of people who overdo it. In moderation gaming is a great social outlet and for people who enjoy good stories and having fun it's great. men and women in the 30's and 40's who don't play games are missing out on an amazing hobby. If you have a child addicted to gaming then its a parenting issue and when dealing with this you need to try to understand the hobby first

freshpopcorn

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Folk have their hobbies, as long as they are not harming anyone who ****ing cares?

Especially in adults once the person is working away in life and can maintain relationships I don’t really see the issue.
I’d know of GAA men who’d leave there wife/family to attend training for nights t/weekends and everything is planned around the GAA calendar but somebody playing a game for a few hours a week is terrible and they should be out in the fresh air.

*When I say attend training they often just see themselves as some type of selector for the club and they club can’t shake them off but they think they are ever so popular with a bunch of young lads.

FTA69

Greyfox wrote: »

Lots of people need to educate themselves about gaming, some ignorant comments in here already. it's a hobby just like watching films or sport or reading books. Yes a minority overdo it but pretty much every hobby has a minority of people who overdo it. In moderation gaming is a great social outlet and for people who enjoy good stories and having fun it's great. men and women in the 30's and 40's who don't play games are missing out on an amazing hobby. If you have a child addicted to gaming then its a parenting issue and when dealing with this you need to try to understand the hobby first

What’s social about sitting in a room on your own blasting avatars?

Church on Tuesday

Like the two posters above say, everything in moderation, there are any amount of other hobbies people can get too invested in and lose themselves completely to it.

Honestly, the gamer negative stereotype has had it's day.

As for the OP, teenagers are gona be teenagers.

kowloon

So a teenaged boy prefers enjoying himself to working?
Playing football is definitely healthier than watching football on a screen (TV or a game) but at least he's not enjoying himself with drugs. You can only try your best.

The rest of the thread just seems to be a lot of grown men who can't understand that different people and different generations do different things for fun.

[Deleted User]

FTA69 wrote: »

What’s social about sitting in a room on your own blasting avatars?

Imagine you're on a skype call with all your friends in the same game. It can be very social. It was a god send during peak lockdown.

freshpopcorn

FTA69 wrote: »

What’s social about sitting in a room on your own blasting avatars?

I’ve known guys to make friends in gaming circles.
They spent all there lives trying in school and joining sports clubs trying to fit in and they always felt like a third wheel in a group. People weren’t nasty with them but they didn’t have much in common.
Now however through the internet, online gaming, etc they can make friends online and chat to them and hopefully organise to meet up and become actually friends and attend gaming/comic conventions/drinks/etc.
I know one or two guys from school to do it and it’s so nice to see them happy and out and about with there friends and not tagging along in a group.

Rothko

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Certain posters here have this weird fascination with gamers and gaming whilst all the time harping on here about their imaginary would be man child kids on their various alt accounts.

Which is quite "ironic" when you think about it.

And they're obsessed with their own faeces too.

Greyfox

FTA69 wrote: »

What’s social about sitting in a room on your own blasting avatars?

Playing online with friends is great, theirs also the option of having a few friends over to your house for drinks while playing Mario karts

Riddle101

I don't think there's anything wrong with people wanting to play games. Perhaps it's a matter of setting a few ground rules with the younger lot. Tell them they can only play it for an hour or two during the weekdays but they need to focus on college/school as well. Weekends they can play it for longer. Something like that.

Part of the problem I see is communication. Talking it out and trying to come to some sort of compromise is a better thing I think, but this whole business of blaming video games or looking down on people who like playing games is a bit ridiculous. It's just another past time that people like to do like watching tv or reading.

scamalert

Greyfox wrote: »

Lots of people need to educate themselves about gaming, some ignorant comments in here already. it's a hobby just like watching films or sport or reading books. Yes a minority overdo it but pretty much every hobby has a minority of people who overdo it. In moderation gaming is a great social outlet and for people who enjoy good stories and having fun it's great. men and women in the 30's and 40's who don't play games are missing out on an amazing hobby. If you have a child addicted to gaming then its a parenting issue and when dealing with this you need to try to understand the hobby first

well reading first commends from some youd imagine their kids where shooting heroin up their d%cks lol comparing it to massive addiction :pac:

exactly its parenting issue, if 18yr old still needs to be told to do dishes, not even do just take em out so what can you expect.

that said theres a massive majority where they buy their kids some PS console and **** ton of games, and yes some of em become like little girls shouting screaming at mic- have demented neighboor kid that basically has all the traits and becomes manic demented because parents are **** and cant keep tabs on him.

as one thing i know once i got my first pc i was put to work to learn $hit inside out, drivers troubleshooting installs etc- and would make money out from knowing how to put stuff together or trouble shoot, nowadays parents pi$$ away thousands to keep their kids occupied and then come out complaining their kid has no social skills like in OPs case.

Deebles McBeebles

Greyfox wrote: »

Playing online with friends is great, theirs also the option of having a few friends over to your house for drinks while playing Mario karts

Reminds me of playing PGA Tour on the Megadrive years ago with a few mates. Few cans deep and it starts getting real competitive. TPC Sawgrass never heard that sort of language before or since.

Victor

John66 wrote: »

The main thing is I have seen no interest from him getting any part time work or anything to assist us with paying for his new lifestyle apart from him emailing a few cv's to potential employers. ... I suppose like most teenagers he doesn't lift a finger at home and won't even empty the dishwasher unless asked

This is the training you have given him. This is as much your fault as his.

Barlett

Doing anything to excess is bad, I've played games since I was a kid but as you get older, the time you have for entertainment declines, I might play a game for a couple of hours every week, I might not, everything in moderation. Considering it's a massive industry, it's not good to be ignorant of it, particularly if you have children, it's only getting bigger so it's no harm to be aware of the good and bad things that exist in games.

People go on about violent videogames, it's lootboxes in the likes of FIFA that people should be concerned about.

riclad

Games are different now, they are social, eg teens play online games like fortnite or pubg ,call of duty with 2 or 3 friends at the same time .
there are free to play games .
call of duty has millions of users online.some single player games take 30 hours to play.
An online game like cod never stop,s ,
theres new maps and weapons coming online every month.
kids play games and talk to each other.
Gaming is even more popular now, since in the time of covid some people
are afraid to go out much.
its a cliche ,every thing in moderation .
if you spend too much time playing games or watching tv ,you won,t have much of a social life.
He must have been doing some work and study if he got enough points to go to college.
is not unusual for a moody teen to be rude or not to do chores around the house.
Some people go through a phase, i,m a teen ,my parents are idiots,
are totally uncool

MadYaker

John66 wrote: »

My son is about to start college and things are still a little up in the air about accomdation, money etc. I'm about an hour from cork and he wants to move out but so far I can't afford it and waiting until I get his time table as no point paying for accomdation if he is in only one day a week. The main thing is I have seen no interest from him getting any part time work or anything to assist us with paying for his new lifestyle apart from him emailing a few cv's to potential employers. In fact since he finished school earlier this year he has spent most of his time in his room playing computer games. His fascination and addiction to this form of entertainment seems to be increasing. I suppose like most teenagers he doesn't lift a finger at home and won't even empty the dishwasher unless asked and then it's a grumble but spends all his free time gaming. But I suppose the main thing I'm concerned about is him stating that if and when he leaves for college he wants to take his gaming system. And I'm thinking no way as what the f** with the amount of time you currently spend on it how can you study and work part time.

What are peoples opinion of students taking there gaming systems to college.

If he wants to move out then he has to pay for it. That's the way it was for me when I started college. I did first year at home and then moved into town after working for a whole summer and I worked weekends and summers all through college to pay for my own living expenses. My parents paid the actual college fees. That's how it should be imo. You aren't that far from where he is studying let him bus it in and out every day. Emailing CVs is a total waste of time he has to go and actually talk to employers.

Montage of Feck

I went through a period where I was absolutely addicted to the likes Age of Empires and Civilisation, but the top games today are utter dross in comparison.

irishguitarlad

I think its more your poor parenting skills op. However, I think many games like fifa, fortnite, etc really hook kids as their brains aren't developed enough to know when to stop.

As for myself I play, but I play single-player story games only as I find online is way too stressful. Me and my girlfriend take turns, when one dies the other plays. We play games like Horizon, Lara Croft, Batman, Hitman, Read Dead, Resident Evil etc.

By the way my gf is a beautiful Spanish woman, I shower eveyday, I don't have a neck beard, I have a job and I speak 3 languages, so yeah this stereotype that the old fogies on here spout is a load of shíte.

John66

Interesting ideas about gaming, I never compared it to watching Tv and yea I can see the similarities, think it might even be more social as he is playing with his friends.

The parenting bit is almost over and don't reckon I did as good a job as I had hoped. I have a difficult marriage and views regarding how to discipline the kids. Often I would try to restrict something or even hold back topping up a phone to encourage the children to help after discussing it with the missus and then she would later give in to them thus making me out to be some sort of control freak. She lets them away with everything and I kinda think they don't respect us for it and we are paying the price now.

But then again there still learning, I suppose I would like them to value there environment and home more and even participate in living in it rather than on a gaming system most of the day. He often says it relaxes him, Can imagine if it starts to interfere with study during college grades will plummet.

freshpopcorn

John66 wrote: »

But then again there still learning, I suppose I would like them to value there environment and home more and even participate in living in it rather than on a gaming system most of the day. He often says it relaxes him, Can imagine if it starts to interfere with study during college grades will plummet.

He's going to be at college surrounded by drink, drugs, the opposite sex or the same if that's his thing. He'll have plenty of distractions from his studies.

TheBlackPill

Pintman Paddy Losty wrote: »

Fair play to your dad.

I see men even in their thirties that still play these games, sometimes for hours at a time.

It's like seeing a grown man out drawing on the footpath in chalk or playing hopscotch. Very weird to be honest.

I'm one of those gaming men. Crusader kings III is brilliant!. I agree call of duty headphones on neckbeards are a pox. If wasnt for the games i would be divorced and supporting multiple bastards!

fergus1001

I think kids do go through that stage but if they have a job and stuff that they have to do then it naturally limits their time, I love to sit down and play games when I have free time but its few and far between these days with work and life commitments

Balmed Out

Im 41 and will probably play a computer game for an hour at some stage most weeks, don't see it as a problem.

I remember one school friend and anothers younger brother who I would have said gaming was an issue. They both completely lacked self motivation and while one improved in his mid 20s the other hasn't.

I remember thinking that they both seemed to satisfy the need for achievement in life by reaching the next level or whatever in a game rather than something in the real world. Gaming itself probably wasn't their problem but was a crutch that they used to avoid tackling whatever was.

TheDavester

Rothko wrote: »

And they're obsessed with their own faeces too.

or spending time with numerous alt accounts to bait people here

JohnnyFlash

Boffins have come up with a terrifying model to show what an avid gamer might look like in 20 years time.

JasonStatham

TheBlackPill wrote: »

I'm one of those gaming men. Crusader kings III is brilliant!. I agree call of duty headphones on neckbeards are a pox. If wasnt for the games i would be divorced and supporting multiple bastards!

Crusader kings sounds like the type of game where you'd produce multiple bas.tards!

Pintman Paddy Losty

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

Boffins have come up with a terrifying model to show what an avid gamer might look like in 20 years time.

That's the spitting image of my nephew. Always put it down to the amount of wacky baccy the young lad smokes but maybe it's the gaming that has him looking like an extra in a zombie movie.

Potential-Monke

I'm here! I'm one of those terrible 'gamers' you're referencing. I spend, oh, I never actually added it up, but I reckon I spend 30+ hours a week gaming. As I'm getting older, I seem to be spending more and more time at it. I'm 37 btw. Yes, I live at home with my parents (if you care to go through my post history, you'll see plenty of reasons why) but basically it works for me and them and there's no complaints from either side.

I do my bit around the house, especially the jobs someone 70+ with health conditions can't do. I'm not big into the physical jobs, but my 3 brothers do that while I ensure there's working internet, tv, dodgy box and their phones are working as expected. I'm the tech guy. I do the shopping for them to save them having to go out in this pandemic (both have lung/breathing related issues). I do my bit and spend the rest of my time gaming.

In that time, I play mostly single player games, I love a good story and the more immersive the better. And within those games, there's more than a fair share of reading, so you can technically say I do a lot of reading each week. To rob a quick quote from Google:

Internet wrote:

In layman's terms, playing video games directly affects and impacts regions of the brain responsible for memory, spatial orientation, information organizations, and fine motor skills. The study also reinforces the claim that, like exercise, playing games for as little as 30 minutes a day, can improve your life

So unlike watching tv (unless it's quiz based shows), i'm actively engaged more than most people while I'm gaming. On top of all this, I have a full time job (nights, i'm ginger so suits me better), I pay bills, I give my bit and help out when I can. I don't put in or out with anyone, and would prefer if people left me alone, because up to 4 years ago I did the whole life/drink/mortgage thing and it nearly killed me. I'm anti-social because, really, people are dicks, and nosey dicks at that (I detest gossip). I have a small circle of friends I use to go into once a week or thereabouts and we'd watch anime, play games or just have a laugh.

So yeah, I do all that, but unlike the lad mentioned in the OP, my parents made sure I did my bit around the house and got outside as much as necessary (again, not as much as others because ginger+sun=burn and pain and suffering for my parents). I've been playing since the Atari 2600 days, and actually had a pong console before that. going by a lot of outdated and ill-informed comments on here, I'm a pure waste, according to those who spends upwards of thousands to follow millionaires around the place kicking a ball around, screaming bloody murder because millionaire A didn't do it exactly the way your pudgy arse would. And then said millionaires having life altering injuries until the other millionaire gets a card. Really must get one of those sponges/sprays, because within a few minutes they're perfectly fine again. Do the medical industry know about this magic?

So you keep on believing what you want to believe, I'll be here, playing my games and thoroughly enjoying my life. Also, bad parenting is not the kids fault. I feel sorry for him that he's not prepared for life because ye let him play games all the time instead of, you know, parenting.