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Do you talk to your neighbours?

king_of_mayo

I know a few of our immediate neighbours, we exchange Christmas cards and the likes but I don't know anything about their background or what they do etc. I tend to avoid getting into situations where we have to talk.

I got caught last week and had to chat to the man next door. All "how are you coping with lockdown" chat. It was awful. I was out for a walk this morning and noticed him driving past me. Knowing that we'd end up going into each other's houses at the same time, and that we'd emptied the "lockdown" chat I was worried that all I had was weather-talk. So I stopped walking, gave it a few minutes (5 I think) and luckily he had parked up and gone in by the time I got back.

It's nice to be nice, but I see no reason why geographic proximity means we should be friends.

So do you talk to your neighbours, are you friendly with them?

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Earthhorse

The two neighbours I chatted with most and got on with best have moved away in the last few years (one of them just a few week's ago).

We occasionally drank or played cards together. It was good fun.

The other neighbours I will speak to a bit in passing but nothing more than that.

Bobblehats

Earthhorse wrote: »

The two neighbours I chatted with most and got on with best have moved away in the last few years (one of them just a few week's ago).

We occasionally drank or played cards together. It was good fun.

The other neighbours I will speak to a bit in passing but nothing more than that.

That happened here it’s like a revolving door now. First a bullish man from mayo, now a meek lad who works in IT they’re maintaining the property though. Keeping it an attractive prospect lest the council swoop in order to house a couple of Somalis

Church on Tuesday

It's always best to keep on good terms with neighbors I find.

CrankyHaus

I say hi to them. One or two are unfriendly pricks. The rest are grand.

andekwarhola

Of course I do.

andekwarhola

king_of_mayo wrote: »

I see nothing wrong with wanting to avoid awkward situations

And then telling thousands of people about it online.

bitofabind

I live alone so it makes good business sense to keep the neighbours onside. If I'm ever burgled, miss a postal delivery or out of town with an overgrowing garden, I know I can always rely on them.

They're also super close in proximity, I live in a semi-D in London where their back garden is yards from my kitchen, so it's hard to ignore interactions with them without things being a bit awkward.

That said, yer wan next door spends about 20 hours a day gardening and takes care of the fella upstairs' plot, which is technically my back yard. I work from the kitchen table so she's about 10 feet away from me for a majority of the working day these weeks, which is slightly uncomfortable

Hector Savage

No , couldn't GIVE A F*CK!!!

My brother is the total opposite and has neighbours over for tea/coffee all the time, but he's too friendly, can be hassling at times.

I'm a grumpy ignorant oul bollix!!

[Deleted User]

pgj2015 wrote: »

I heard a great story lately, new neighbours (a couple) moved in and they really were keeping to themselves but one day they were walking down the path and saw some neighbours coming their way, they hopped over a wall through briers and bushed to get away from them lol a lot of people have become very unsocial and its sad, to much facebook and phones have people ruined.

I don't really know why, but I like the sound of this pair. There's an old widow near us, down home, who does something like that. She'd sooner stand in the ditch than salute you, but that's just her way. I don't think you can blame it on the internet, there have always been people who aren't "sociable", if that's the right word. It's the 'hail-fellow-well-met' types that I'd be more distrustful of.

Aglomerado

I'm on smiling and small talk terms that's about it. Quite friendly with one family. They are all pretty quiet and decent so never had any negative experiences.
Have new neighbours on one side for past six weeks but I haven't met them even though I am working from home. They appear to be working night shifts.

Potential-Monke

Agricola wrote: »

Ah come on, ya lost me completely now. The takeaway delivery guy? If you have a problem saying "Thanks lad, take her handy" then you might be on a slippery slope there

Except it's not usually that straight forward. If you're paying by cash, there'e that awkward moment where they 'fumble' for the change in the silent hope you'll just say keep it, which I have done a few times just to avoid that moment. Bring on delivery robots!

Riflecreek wrote: »

These are also the type of people who don't answer a private number or the front door when someone knocks.

Usually private numbers are collection companies or some other crowd looking for money. If it's a genuine business or service, the number won't be blocked. If it's a friend, they should know to text. And I detest cold calling, and most people who would be calling that I know would text/arrange first.

pgj2015 wrote: »

a lot of people have become very unsocial and its sad

Or, and bear with me here, maybe people no longer want to subscribe to the
everyone knowing your business model. I hate gossip, and that's what most random or 'not quite friends' people who chat with you are after, gossip and scandal to spread to their friends. Just in my opinion anyway.

When I had my own place, the attached neighbours were grand. The mother of the family (same age as myself) was sound, came to a few house parties, I went to hers, all over the space of 5 years. Neighbours to the other side were as quiet and private as me. Across the road was the couple in retirement who lived there their entire lives so got to know them, the odd chat and not much else. Quiet estate anyway and rarely if ever trouble. Didn't help I was a Garda at the time so had to keep some what of a facade up. But in general, we left each other to our own devices.

Back in the country now and love it. No real neighbours to speak of, nice a quiet and private.

joeharte123

In rural communities people tend to be friendly with neighbours. In urban communities up until around 2000 I’d imagine people knew their neighbours and chatted to the, regularly. Today it’s different. People are temporary residents in rented accommodation, people are cautious to get to know “strangers” their neighbours don’t speak English etc.

JohnnyFlash

Buddy and Pal? Give them the odd alright if I meet them.

Ray Donovan

God Bless Rural Ireland - I know everyone and talk to everyone in my locality.

talla10

I'm friendly with a few on the road and have gone for pints before, drinks in the house etc. Its nice to be able to run over and have a chat, borrow some tools etc without being awkward.

One couple on the road actively avoid us in the shops I've noticed them moving out of their way to even cross paths. Our Crime? We bought the house when we were 23 not married or even engaged. Local scandal altogether :pac:

Fast forward 12 years now married with 3 kids and still make them run a mile

Kylta

I get on with my neighbours if there's a problem I help out. Maybe 18 months ago one of the neighbours flat was filled with smoke from a fire in the flat underneath her. Me and my neighbour got them out. Saying that some of the neighbours fight with each other so that can be amusing at times. Although im not paranoid my neighbours will ever only know what I want them to know. Like my personal stuff is my business. But I have to say my neighbours are good neighbours

KaneToad

I give a big smile and earnest Good morning/evening to everyone I pass. I don't break stride.

jmreire

Live on a road with no houses on "my" side, and 4 on the other side...we all know each other, and if one of us need's some help with something, no problem, we help each other out. if we happen to meet , we chat,,,there's no stress or strain involved...sometime's despite the close proximity, we might not see one another for weeks on end, and only chat in passing, but thats fine... we all know where we are with each other. I've often rambled across the road to chat and have a coffee, and vice versa. The best of all world's as far as I'm concerned.

Sinzo

Rodney Bathgate wrote: »

He probably sat in his car pretending to be taking a call for a few minutes for the same reason.

Ha ha.. so true... I'm guffawing. .

newaccount2017

Moved into a new house and went to introduce myself to the neighbours (a house on either side and 2 across the street from me). 2 out of the 4 houses were nice, warm and friendly. Haven't seen them much since but that's fine by me. 3rd house, only introduced myself to the oldest son, so haven't even met his parents yet but I made the effort in the first place. The 4 house, the one next to me, are the oddest- when I went to introduce myself, they asked if they could demolish our adjoining garden wall and build a new one. I thought it was a bit much to be honest, asking that within the first minute we met. I was hesitant cos this was my first day of owning the house and hadn't even gotten a chance to have a proper look around since viewings with estate agent. Since then, they've been really odd, haven't said hello or anything. One of them made a sarky comment to me about how great it is that I'm off work for so long, when I was working at home during the lockdown. I don't want anything to do with them.

Granny Smyth

Not since they passed around that eviction petition.

Sinzo

jimgoose wrote: »

I'm civil and courteous with them, I give them time-of-day when appropriate, but as the old folks used to say, if you don't fall in you don't fall out.

Tru dat

Leg End Reject

Talk to them all but friendlier with some.

If the sh1t hit the fan for any of us there's a choice of doors to knock on, yet we don't live in one another's pockets.

I can't understand not wanting to be on good terms with neighbours.

lucalux

I live in a rural area and don't know a whole lot of the people who live on 'my' road. Maybe the houses nearest I would know the family name, and some of their first names.

I couldn't tell you the last time I spoke with any one of them, and I haven't even seen them anywhere, other than them driving past the house, or meeting them while driving, when I'm generally concentrating on driving and not checking cars to see do I know them!
It's been years, and a good few years at that.

Suits me grand, and I'd say they're fine with it too. No need to be forcing things I think.

Sinzo

Riflecreek wrote: »

Most of the oddballs on boards.ie are terrified of talking to their neighbours, they lack basic social skills. These are also the type of people who don't answer a private number or the front door when someone knocks.

I take it you are counting yourself to be one of the oddballs too.. ;-)

Pherekydes

On one side, yeah. Young (mid 40s) couple with 2 young kids. Very nice. Occasionally have a chat with either. Wife is hot! But constantly harassed.

The guy is a really decent skin. Comes around to cut his hedge that grows over on our side. Good like that. They're always worried that their kids are too noisy for us, but they don't bother us at all. Myself and the wife are the opposite of most people. Most people don't give a sh!te about the noise their own kids make, but are irritated by other people's kids. Other people's kids don't annoy me at all. Especially when they're in their own garden playing on swings and stuff like that.

The other side is owned by a hospital and the residents are in assisted living, with intellectual disabilities, so you can't really have a conversation with them. But they are no problem, and that's great, yeah?

pgj2015

[QUOTE=

Or, and bear with me here, maybe people no longer want to subscribe to the
everyone knowing your business model. I hate gossip, and that's what most random or 'not quite friends' people who chat with you are after, gossip and scandal to spread to their friends. Just in my opinion anyway.

.[/QUOTE]

I don't think most people who talk to their neighbours are doing it to get news or gossip, it is just done because it is nice to get on with your neighbours. we feed our neighbours dogs and let them out for exercise etc when they are gone away, if they ever needed help or anything all they have to do is ask.
imagine that couple who jumped the wall asking you for something, i wouldn't do them any favors.

lucalux

pgj2015 wrote: »

I don't think most people who talk to their neighbours are doing it to get news or gossip, it is just done because it is nice to get on with your neighbours. we feed our neighbours dogs and let them out for exercise etc when they are gone away, if they ever needed help or anything all they have to do is ask.
imagine that couple who jumped the wall asking you for something, i wouldn't do them any favors.

Hmm, I wonder though, you would act pettily and refuse them a favour if they asked, because they chose to do their own thing one day?

Sure how did the people know the couple who jumped the wall were avoiding them at all? They could be exploring, and just happened to time it badly perhaps.

Could have been going for a quickie in the great outdoors, or one of them needed the bathroom urgently, and couldn't wait, or whatever.

Funny how you say it's not collecting gossip, yet the 'great story' has travelled to you, and is being used to label them as antisocial, and you'd refuse them a favour should they ask. Sure isn't that lovely and friendly

pgj2015

lucalux wrote: »

Hmm, I wonder though, you would act pettily and refuse them a favour if they asked, because they chose to do their own thing one day?

Sure how did the people know the couple who jumped the wall were avoiding them at all? They could be exploring, and just happened to time it badly perhaps.

Could have been going for a quickie in the great outdoors, or one of them needed the bathroom urgently, and couldn't wait, or whatever.

Funny how you say it's not collecting gossip, yet the 'great story' has travelled to you, and is being used to label them as antisocial, and you'd refuse them a favour should they ask. Sure isn't that lovely and friendly

it wasn't a one off with the couple apparently.

JupiterKid

Yep, I do talk to a few of my neighbours and two are key holders of my place. I would take a parcel/package delivery for my next door neighbour and vice-versa.

We might pop in the odd time for a cuppa and a chat. One of my neighbours is a really sound older gent who has a lot of similar interests to me - maps and geography, namely!

He’s also lent me a couple of power tools for DIY jobs in my gaff. We aren’t in each other’s faces, but we do look out for each other.

My next door neighbour on one side is an elderly woman, a retired teacher who lives alone. During the Covid-19 lockdown I would check on her once a week and would get a few things for her each week so that she could cocoon, as did another neighbour. She was very grateful and got me a few potted fuscias in gratitude.

It’s nice to be nice.