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Most embarrassing moment of your life?

mr_fegelien

Remember a few years back when I boarded a coach bus from Drogheda to Dublin to go to school. Mother loaded money into my card and promised me it'd be there. There were about 15 people at the bus stop. Got in and the driver told me I had no money on my card and I didn't have any change so I had to squish people getting out.

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wakka12

pinkyeye wrote: »

I wouldn't tell my most embarrassing moment here because they're all pretty tame here but I had a few when I worked in a cinema years ago.

1. A kid puked all over the lobby and in my rush to put down a wet floor sign I slipped on the puke and tried grabbing for my colleague to save me, caught him by the bollix and both of us ended up on the floor in the puke with him in agony.

2. When standing on what we called the dropbox you constantly said "can I take your tickets off you there please?" in auto pilot. There was an absolutely drop dead gorgeous fella coming towards me and my filthy mind obviously wandered because instead I said "can I take your clothes off you there please?" 30 years later I'm still remembered for that. About 50 people pissing themselves laughing and this poor fella going redder by the minute. :D

Haha, I started blushing when I read the second one, dont know which position is more embarassing, his or yours

monkeysnapper

God I've done so many embarrassing things in my life the tv show inbetweeners could have been written about people just like me. I always seem to get talked into doing stupid things ....

I'll give you my most resent one....

A few years ago we were at a family christening and i was talking to my brother in law and his new girlfriend.... chatting away drinking my guiness and i kind of chocked on a bit of it and coughed a whole mouth full of guiness in her face ....I was totally humiliated,,, I ain't being let forget that one ....luckily their relationship didnt last ....

Another one from my school years.... 1987

Myself and another friend thought we were going to a drama class , for a after school play but got our wires crossed ... it was a creative dance class ...as they called it.... it was lunch time so all the school looked in the hall windows at like 30 hot girls doing this beautiful dancing and two stupid fecking boys ... I swear to god I could have died ....so embarrassed.... I got so much grief !!!!

I think that's enough for now .......

Leg End Reject

wakka12 wrote: »

Haha, I started blushing when I read the second one, dont know which position is more embarassing, his or yours

I just want to know if his clothes were removed ...

pinkyeye

Leg End Reject wrote: »

I just want to know if his clothes were removed ...

Unfortunately not, although I swear to god I can still imagine that man's body. :P

Gael23

antodeco wrote: »

A year ago, 2 months after I got my gallbladder out, I went to fire restaurant for dinner. Lots of rich foods meant my stomach wasn't the best (anyone who has had their gallbladder removed will know this).

So post meal, decided to wander over to the Dawson lounge for a pint of Guinness. Halfway across the road, I trusted a fart that I shouldn't have. I waddle to the pub, order a Guinness and go to the Jax to tidy up. No Jax roll. What do I do? My Guinness was ready, and as I was looking forward to the pint, instood there, consuming my pint, in full knowledge I had the equivalent of a melted mars bar down my hole.

Finish the pint, post haste, and waddle off to burger king on Grafton Street to use their Jax. Wander down. Queue for 5 minutes while the one cubicle is in use. The previous chap finishes, and in I wander. No Jax roll again. Disaster.

So thinking, I decide to wander down to McDonalds. At this stage, the mars bar had turned into something akin to a mud bath and a vienetta. Held together tightly by my arse cheeks. Making a provereable chocolate diamond.

Eventually make it to McDonalds. Only the disabled toilet free. I didn't care. In I wandered and relieved myself of this goo as well as the internal rumblings that had continued. After about 10 minutes there was knocking on the door. Security guard thought I was up to something. I opened the door and obviously a poo particle wave hit his nostrils as he realised the gravitas of the situation.

That was embarrassing.

I have IBD and have been in these situations. Not nice but you do need to shrug it off sometimes. Lesson learned though

pinkyeye

Btw OP, if that is truly your most embarrassing moment of your life I'm am truly embarrassed for you.

fryup

5 pages in....and not one "caught wankin" story, i'm disappointed

ldy4mxonucwsq6

Candie wrote: »

I was crossing a major intersection on a windy day and my dress blew up around my head and I couldn't get it down. I was wearing cartoon drawers too. I could hear people laughing in their cars.

I called my old boss Dad in a very big and very serious meeting. I call my dad by name so I don't know where that came from.

I greeted someone I knew in a crowded shop but it was my own reflection in a mirror and loads of people overheard.

Not that long ago, I saw my OH coming down an escalator towards me in a shop while I was waiting for him, and I gave him the finger-guns-of-love to the heart, did a little 3 part panto of holstering the imaginary guns, then realised it wasn't him. The shame.

Should have gone to SpecSavers.

So, so many more.

This thread made me laugh so much!

Candie, I can relate, I'm always doing stupid stuff like this regularly. My speciality is waving back at people who are waving (at the person walking behind me). Or waving and calling someone who is not the person I thought it was....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svzl3aeezLQ

harry Bailey esq

Signore Fancy Pants wrote: »

Honeydew is better.

Quote: PennyWiseClown
When I was 14 or so I f*cked an orange.
Not in front of anybody thank God , but when I think about it I cringe.

Should have went for a watermelon at least ...

That sounds like a wager to me, I'm off to the greengrocers, I'll report back...

bear1

fryup wrote: »

5 pages in....and not one "caught wankin" story, i'm disappointed

Sorry I'm late to the thread.
Whilst in my teen years I used to go for the summer to Italy to stay with my grandmother and improve my Italian.
Hormones going nuts in the summer heat and I knew that there was a certain channel that would screen dirty movies after 1am.
Grandmother would stay up till midnight which would drive me cracked cause she'd ask a thousand questions.

Anywho, I waited for her to go to sleep and waited patiently in my room till just before 1am.
Had the path to the dining room planned on advance as some doors creaked so I'd leave them ajar when going to bed so I knew I wouldnt have to open them on my way for a 2min rape of myself.

Made it to the dining room and shut the main door which amazingly... Doesn't creak.
Made myself comfortable and got down to business.
About 1min in... I hear in the darkness "what are you doing?".
I shat myself from the fright and grabbed the nearest seat cushion and covered myself and switch the channel.
She's obviously still in a daze from being woken up and sits next to me to know if there's anything good on...
She left a few minutes later and so did I.
Never wanked in there again.

Purple Mountain

A few years ago I had my first all over spray tan for my son's communion day.
Since it was my first one, I was a bit perplexed by it all especially the contrast between my glowing body and the pasty white butt part where I had left the paper knickers on.
I have a friend who would have a sense of humour like my own so I send her a selfie of my ass in a full length mirror to show the contrast. She got a laugh from it as predicted.
Anyhow, fast forward to a few days after the communion.
Myself and the little guy are in the pharmacy getting photos developed from his big day. I'm a technology Neanderthal so I called the shop assistant over to shop me how to upload the file from my phone to the screen.
As the photos began to pop up on the screen, I noticed my son trying to hold in a fit of giggles but his face was bursting.
Yep, the butt photo was still on my phone memory and one of the images that popped up.
I held it together really well and acted all innocent distracting her with another question and in fairness she acted very professionally.
When we got outside the shop, the little guy collapsed into giggles and was like wtf!

Bigbagofcans

Purple Mountain wrote: »

A few years ago I had my first all over spray tan for my son's communion day.
Since it was my first one, I was a bit perplexed by it all especially the contrast between my glowing body and the pasty white butt part where I had left the paper knickers on.

:D

That reminds me, a friend works in beauty giving spray tans. She's had a few women put the paper thong on the wrong way around - they put the 'thong' part to the front leaving everything hanging out!

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Shortly after I moved into my house, my parents were dropping off a desk they were getting rid of.

I was just lazing around the house wearing harem pants (big wide legged drapey hippie things). And no underwear.

My housemate knows my parents so he came out to say hi then offered to help me carry the disassembled desk up the stairs.

Argh. I was walking a few steps ahead of him, carrying one of the panels of the desk which was very wide, so I couldn't really turn, and very heavy. As we're going up the stairs, with my arse RIGHT at his eye level, I just walk the pants right off myself. Couldn't turn, couldn't just drop the panel, trying frantically to balance the panel on the next step with one hand, grab my pants from around my ankles with the other, he's stood there with his eyes screwed shut, laughing his head off going "I saw nothing, I swear!" which was a very gentlemanly lie.

Every time he saw me for the next few days he'd start laughing again.

Oh, and on the bus theme. Last year I started to walk into work one morning then thought feckit I'll stop and hop on a bus, I was tired and a wee bit hungover. So waited at the next stop I passed, not my usual stop. Bus comes, driver opens the door, looks at me uncertainly and asks if I'm waiting for a bus. Eejit thinks I, why else would I be standing there?

He kindly pointed out that I was in fact standing beside an ESB pole about 15 feet away from the stop

I muttered something about how I can see the road better from this angle (ugh) and sat my dumb ass down.

pinkyeye

Alondra Little Drivel wrote: »

Shortly after I moved into my house, my parents were dropping off a desk they were getting rid of.

I was just lazing around the house wearing harem pants (big wide legged drapey hippie things). And no underwear.

My housemate knows my parents so he came out to say hi then offered to help me carry the disassembled desk up the stairs.

Argh. I was walking a few steps ahead of him, carrying one of the panels of the desk which was very wide, so I couldn't really turn, and very heavy. As we're going up the stairs, with my arse RIGHT at his eye level, I just walk the pants right off myself. Couldn't turn, couldn't just drop the panel, trying frantically to balance the panel on the next step with one hand, grab my pants from around my ankles with the other, he's stood there with his eyes screwed shut, laughing his head off going "I saw nothing, I swear!" which was a very gentlemanly lie.

Every time he saw me for the next few days he'd start laughing again.

Oh, and on the bus theme. Last year I started to walk into work one morning then thought feckit I'll stop and hop on a bus, I was tired and a wee bit hungover. So waited at the next stop I passed, not my usual stop. Bus comes, driver opens the door, looks at me uncertainly and asks if I'm waiting for a bus. Eejit thinks I, why else would I be standing there?

He kindly pointed out that I was in fact standing beside an ESB pole about 15 feet away from the stop I muttered something about how I can see the road better from this angle (ugh) and sat my dumb ass down.

Brilliant story about the trousers falling down.

:D:D

When I was heavily pregnant I had resorted to wearing one elasticated maxi skirt that was all I had left that fit me. I stood on it in Tescos and the whole thing came down, I reefed it up really quickly convinced no-one saw me but I'm sure someone did on the CCTV.

pinkyeye

Okay, another one that is actually making me blush thinking of it.

First romantic weekend away with a new Beau, hotel room in Paris, really small (as they all are) so the ensuite was within touching distance of the bed so I took immodium all weekend to make sure I didn't do a stinker.

Come Sunday the cramps were something else and I got up in the middle of the night to do a fart in the bathroom.

Well it reverberated off every wall in the toilet, hit the bowl and it was like thunder.

:D:D:D

Woke him up, and he's knocking on the door going "are you okay love?"

I'd say it woke the room next door.

I swear to god I just wanted to drown myself in the loo.

eviltwin

Walked in on two family members riding. Both were butt naked, I saw everything. I'm still traumatised by it.

Lesalare

eviltwin wrote: »

Walked in on two family members riding. Both were butt naked, I saw everything. I'm still traumatised by it.

I had that happen to me, with my ex husband. We were staying at his folks place for a while whilst sorting out housing in Aus. I was up on top of him one Sat morning, starkers, doing what you do, mad at it, his father walked into the room and said:

"Where do I find the key for...."

I turned around casually as I thought it was the cat pushing the door open initially and was faced with his dad just standing there slack jawed.

I found it near to impossible to look at him in the face for at least 5 days.

seenitall

Bigbagofcans wrote: »

:D

That reminds me, a friend works in beauty giving spray tans. She's had a few women put the paper thong on the wrong way around - they put the 'thong' part to the front leaving everything hanging out!

Yup, that was me once upon a time!:o (not for a spray tan, for a bikini wax - I guess I had the idea it was supposed to make things easier!)

You only make that mistake the once, though - I learned then.

I am also a professional in mistaking people for greeting me when they are waving to someone behind me, I always wave back and greet them enthusiastically as well. Just happened there a few days ago again.
And the vice versa thing - when they are greeting me, I usually think they are saying hi to someone behind me and so I do the Taxi Driver routine, while they laugh at me - morto!

Btw, only yesterday I was reading up on psychopaths, as you do, and an article said that if you wanted to test if someone is a psychopath, ask them the OP's question. If they don't have an example or they take a long time to think of a story, it is an indication, as psychopaths tend to blank out embarrassement from their memory, it is too hurtful to their precious ego, but they will usually cook up a story after a while. May be hokum, dunno.

ETA: oh, there was also that time when half the city saw my butt, similar to Candie's experience, but what the heck, that's more funny than embarrassing to think of it now. I posted about it here a couple of years ago!

decky1

When i was young around 10 maybe my mother sent me to pay for some bottled gas , as i went into the shop i notice a wire rack with books about cookers etc, on the way out when passing said rack the toggle of my coat [which had a hood] went in someway to the wire rack, and for the life of me i could'nt get it out, so i'm at the door pulling rack and hood while the assistant is standing at the counter looking down at me she must have thought i was having a fit of some sort, have e never forgot that day all those years ago.

retro:electro

When I was in a play a few years ago and we had a quick change between scenes and had to get dressed in the wings of the stage with minimal lighting. Unbeknownst to myself I had put my trousers on backwards and only realised mid way through dancing to “just blew in from the Windy City”, giving it my all. More embarrassing however is the fact I had left the zip open so the open zip bit had streeeetched to a massive diamond shape around my arse, giving the audience a nice flash every time I turned around. Didn’t even have nice knickers on ffs. Lots of pointing and laughing.

[Deleted User]

decky1 wrote: »

When i was young around 10 maybe my mother sent me to pay for some bottled gas , as i went into the shop i notice a wire rack with books about cookers etc, on the way out when passing said rack the toggle of my coat [which had a hood] went in someway to the wire rack, and for the life of me i could'nt get it out, so i'm at the door pulling rack and hood while the assistant is standing at the counter looking down at me she must have thought i was having a fit of some sort, have e never forgot that day all those years ago.

And even though it probably felt like two mortifying hours of embarrassment to you, the shop assistant probably barely registered a kiddy getting in a fumble and probably never thought about it again.

It's funny how things that feel huge to us are probably barely notable to an observer.

jaxxx

eviltwin wrote: »

Walked in on two family members riding. Both were butt naked, I saw everything. I'm still traumatised by it.

I think I can speak for everyone when I say, more details needed!

banie01

eviltwin wrote: »

Walked in on two family members riding. Both were butt naked, I saw everything. I'm still traumatised by it.

Family members?
Like blood relatives?

eviltwin

banie01 wrote: »

Family members?
Like blood relatives?

No nothing like that but definitely two people who should not have been having sexy time together

Dj Stiggie

eviltwin wrote: »

No nothing like that but definitely two people who should not have been having sexy time together

So many more questions than answers!

Airyfairy12

mr_fegelien wrote: »

Remember a few years back when I boarded a coach bus from Drogheda to Dublin to go to school. Mother loaded money into my card and promised me it'd be there. There were about 15 people at the bus stop. Got in and the driver told me I had no money on my card and I didn't have any change so I had to squish people getting out.

How is THAT your most embarrassing moment? Have you left your house more than twice in your life? I had about 5 embarrassing moments from this morning alone that are way worse than that.

Melania Frump

Mine involved 3 other people and I am taking it to the grave. It was so many years ago but I still go red at the thought. I have said too much.

Dia_Anseo

Melania Frump wrote: »

Mine involved 3 other people and I am taking it to the grave. It was so many years ago but I still go red at the thought. I have said too much.

Hey Melania sweetie, I remember that night too 🤗

freddie1970

I remember when i was 15 or 16 my mother was going away for the day during the summer so i had my gf and a few friends over ..anyway i was hard at it in the bedroom with the gf and there was a knock on the door ..
I ran down and answered it was a nun a friend of my mothers there to check on me..we talked for a few mins but she looked very uneasy and strange ..
It was only when she left i realised there was a condom caught in my zip and hanging down ..

cj maxx

It's hard to remember embarrassing moments as I'm good at erasing them from memory. One I remember is a girl waving at me and beckoning me over from the other side of the road. I wave back enthusiastically and cross the street . I haven't a clue who it is but she obviously knows me and I'm sure I'll recognise her closer up and after talking to her , right?
Any over I go and say ,hey fancy meeting you here, how have you been keeping
etc , she's looking looking at me like wtf. It wasn't me she was waving at but some lad who was fitting a shop window when I was walking by him. We laugh but my face turned purple with shame.