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GIRLFRIEND GAVE RANDOM GUY HER NUMBER

rob15

my gf give a random good looking guy her number after talking to him for about 3 minutes at a festival while i was there. she told me straight away she give a guy her number and says its to make friends because she hasn't got many. i was pissed but she told me im all she wants and its just to make friends. did i have the right to be pissed? should i still be pissed? and what would you guys do/react now??

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Xterminator

what do you want to hear Rob?

i dont know how long you are together, if you two are exclusive, if you are intimate, what age you both are, nor how much expereince you have.

Its never going to feel good that she gives her phone number to another guy, but if she is upfront with you, and just wants to be mates, then perhaps no harm was meant. I can see why you might feel threatened, and i think a lot of it comes down to trust.

Do you trust her? Has she even done anything to make you not trust her?

If she wants to be friends with guys, i think that's okay. But are you okay with that?

Passenger

Yes, just "friends" with a random good looking bloke whom she probably doesn't find attractive anyway. Major red flag imo.

woodchuck

OP is this the same girl you posted about recently?

Honestly, it doesn't sound like she's committed to a relationship with you. I think you just need to let her go, otherwise you'll continue pulling our your hair over her.

rob15

yea its the same girl. but we are official now 1 month

Ursus Horribilis

Rob, how many ways does she have to tell you that's she's not into you?

zapper55

Oh Rob. It's not that official if she's giving her number to someone else.

If I was with a bloke that gave his number to a random hottie then used a bs excuse to explain it then I wouldn't want to be with him any more.

This is not ok Rob.

Ursus Horribilis

Rob, you are setting yourself up for heartache and headmelt if you stay with her. Where is your self respect?

rob15

Ursus Horribilis wrote: »

Rob, you are setting yourself up for heartache and headmelt if you stay with her. Where is your self respect?

really? but shes always telling me how much she is in love with me and misses me when im not around. she even talks about marrying me someday and moving in together. she only moved to this country last year and has no friends

Ursus Horribilis

OK. I'm out.

rob15

Ursus Horribilis wrote: »

OK. I'm out.

Why??

MEGA BRO WOLF 5000

rob15 wrote: »

really? but shes always telling me how much she is in love with me and misses me when im not around. she even talks about marrying me someday and moving in together. she only moved to this country last year and has no friends

After a month?

Run. Run as far away as possible.

road_high

rob15 wrote: »

really? but shes always telling me how much she is in love with me and misses me when im not around. she even talks about marrying me someday and moving in together. she only moved to this country last year and has no friends

Surely this is another pisstake thread? It couldn't be an actual scenario....

woodchuck

So within the space of a few weeks, she's gone from not even wanting to be officially in a relationship with you, to talking about marriage?!

OP this whole situation is completely messed up.

rob15

i promise you this is real. i also think its ****ed up. she said she didn't want to be official because shes afraid of being hurt and has anxiety issues

LegacyUser

rob15 wrote: »

i promise you this is real. i also think its ****ed up. she said she didn't want to be official because shes afraid of being hurt and has anxiety issues

Then leave her to have her issues with Mr Hottie. No women at this event that she could have befriended?

If your thread is not trolling then really take in what is being said to you and dump her. She is playing you for a fool.

Passenger

rob15 wrote: »

i promise you this is real. i also think its ****ed up. she said she didn't want to be official because shes afraid of being hurt and has anxiety issues

Don't be so naïve, man. Come on. All the signs are there from what you're telling us. Cut your losses and move on.

KrustyUCC

Run away and fast. This will not end well for you the longer you keep seeing her
First after four months she withdrew the BF label
Now after 1 month of officially being back as a BF and "shes always telling me how much she is in love with you and misses you when im not around. she even talks about marrying me someday and moving in together.”
Strange that she wouold then give a random guy her number. Very disrespectful to you
Plenty of other ways of making friends bar giving some randomer her number

bottlebrush

rob15 wrote: »

really? but shes always telling me how much she is in love with me and misses me when im not around. she even talks about marrying me someday and moving in together. she only moved to this country last year and has no friends

Many people say things all the time but do things completely differently.

it's the things they DO that you need to pay heed to. . .

rob15

she only moved here and has no friends and she said its to make friends the same culture as her (because he was) and that maybe he'd have family or sisters she could befriend. she says she misses her culture.

honestly though i havent heard anyone back her up. i already forgave her but said ill never be ok with it as it still bothers me. should i bring it back up with her? or let this on slide and keep an eye??

KrustyUCC

You're all over the place info wise OP

You're other thread was made on 12-04 yet apparently now ye are official a month

You have gone from “did i have the right to be pissed? should i still be pissed? and what would you guys do/react now??” to already forgiving her less than four hours later despite the majority of people saying run away

Up to you what you do

MissShihTzu

There's none so blind as those who cannot see...

Just how could so many people be wrong about what you've posted OP? Unless you're trolling us???

[Deleted User]

Well, if they are from the same place/culture, maybe she did just want to be friends..

cannotlogin

Why on earth are you chasing someone who treats you like ****?

You've posted lots about her and it's all the same behaviour.

No one here can help you if you keep ignoring everything being said.

People tell you who they are by their actions - her actions say she has no interest in you and no respect for you. End of. Accept this and move on.

babi-hrse

You sound like your 15.
Honestly she just wants to be wanted
Hang about she'll be looking over her shoulder to find mr next. Leave her she'll come running and start writing she misses you, come back the former will happen. Your an anchor but she'll probably leave if something perfect comes along.
It's entirely up to you if you want to keep going along with her expect more of the same but no point asking should you be pissed take it for what it is and don't be surprised if she ends up with someone on the side or telling you she's moving on.
I guess at the end of the day can you put up with that?

woodchuck

Mod note

A reminder to all posters:

It is not the done thing on the PI or RI forums to ask an OP to pm/msn/skype/email you. This is done for two reasons:

1. To protect those from trolls and other possible unsavory people posting on the internet when they may be in a vulnerable state. Threads on PI/RI are monitored by the mods so that bad and dangerous advice is not permitted and deemed unhelpful.

2. To protect posters from trolls and unsavory people posting on the internet who pose as a person needing help and advice and so that posters do not end up locked in to a pm exchange with someone they can not help.

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OP, please only ask for advice on thread.

lawred2

rob15 wrote: »

yea its the same girl. but we are official now 1 month

Official what?

Move on. You're being made to look a fool.

leggo

I once had a housemate who used to say the same things about wanting to make friends, she wasn’t from this country and didn’t have a core friend group, every now and then she’d go on Tinder ‘just to meet people’ and bring lads back to try get free drugs (she admitted this to us, “I won’t have sex with them unless I have to” was one quote). Whatever, fine. I remember one night the three of us who lived there got ridiculously drunk and all ended up messing around with each other.

The next day we met her boyfriend.

I obviously asked, gently, what the story was. Her excuse was that she got lonely and didn’t have close friends, he ticked that box, and what he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. She didn’t want to hurt him but also didn’t see any problem in what she was doing. A textbook narcissist totally incapable of caring for, considering or staying loyal to a person, messing this guy around just because she could and not even blinking. He’d give her money and buy regular trips for them to go on. She’d call him when we were in the room saying she was just going to bed when we could see her getting ready to go out, when she’d inevitably either not come home or bring another lad back. She didn’t give a single **** about this guy. Eventually he copped on, got rid and I was delighted for him.

Are you sure you’re not dating the same person? Because, even if you’re not, this is probably the reality of the person you’re going out with or at least soon will be. Don’t be the guy, like her boyfriend, who was the only person who knew her that didn’t know what she was because he didn’t want to see it. There are other women OP. You might be blown away by this probably gorgeous, exotic girl and think you mightn’t do better. But you’re not doing better than anyone, you’re doing worse. All you’ve done is found a gorgeous girl who doesn’t give a **** about you but is willing to use you when necessary. Have higher standards for yourself and find someone who actually cares and who’s actions support that.

Yellow pack crisps

So much trouble, such a short space of time.

ManOfMystery

People in happy, committed and stable relationships don't hand out their numbers to attractive members of the opposite sex 3 mins after meeting them at a festival.

Open your eyes OP. She doesn't know what she wants. It doesn't really matter what she says or what she tells you because her actions tell a different story.

Hedgelayer

The exact same thing happened with me at body and soul, the ultimate sht test see what I would put up with.

That was only the tip of the iceberg she was also on to me about a walking trip she was planning alone, ALONE
Sure wasn't she meet up with her exe from India, and they spent the weekend together.
Her friends inadvertently let the cat out of the bag the following weekend...

By the way is your girlfriend 6"2 and has long red hair by any chance.....