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Work crush and Christmas party.

Red Lightning

I work in a secondary school and have a crush on one of my colleagues. I'm 25 and she's 22.

Ive gotten to speak to get a lot recently and would like to ask her out.

We have our Christmas party tomorrow evening and am wondering should I try and turn things a little flirtier than things have been or make any moves?

I don't drink so I will have my wit's about me but it also means I may not be three most confident.

Any suggestions on how to approach this? Thanks

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colm_mcm

Have a proper conversation with her, see what happens. You’re overthinking this, don’t bother making a game plan. Forget the dance thing anyway - that went out before you were born.

[Deleted User]

Lets pretend for a second OP that you had to rely on your own instinct here, what would you do?

ligerdub

"Don't mix business with pleasure"
"Don't **** on your own doorstep"

Bollox! While I don't advocate reckless behaviour in terms of romantic (for want of a better word in some cases) relationships with work colleagues, these standard cliches just don't wash. Chances are most of us on here know of many couples which began while people were working together and continued to do so for the long-term. Some of those relationships go sour, but then again so do most jobs. You can make a move on somebody, and whether or not it goes well or not, there's no reason why you can't both continue in your work without significant problems.

"Don't mix business with pleasure" is the statement of somebody who doesn't have a potential 22 year old love interest. That won't last forever.

As you say yourself you're finishing up next week, you're effectively done there are far as you're both concerned. Don't let it be the focus of your night but it has to be viewed as a fairly decent opportunity to find out. Which is more likely to be a better time, the pre-Christmas period where people are in good form and looking forward to the Christmas break, or January where you'll be becoming a distant memory more and more and everyone is broke, cold and miserable?**

Ideally though you're going to have to at least pick up on indication of interest in some form. Is there any sign that she might be interested in you in more than a standard "we're friends" way? If there's absolutely none then you pretty much already know the answer.

Whatever happens I wish you all the best, but know this, if this doesn't work out in your favour you'll be letting us all down.

**Really depends on the form of the party. If it's just a dinner among a handful of fellow staff members then chances are subtly and a lack of awkwardness might be hard to avoid. If it's a large gathering and there's a chance for 1:1 conversation then that's a whole different ballgame.

brinty

Red Lightning wrote:

Just want to clarify a few things. I don't plan on making a move on her this evening. No trying time shift her or get in her pants cos it's not my style. I meant more along the lines of, do I try and sit beside her at the meal, ask her to dance, maybe make it a little obvious that I may be interested in her.

Ok dude,relax and breath for a moment,sit beside her if you get a chance and strike up a bit of conversation,have something in mind you're comfortable chatting about (music,TV programs,sport) be confident in yourself and how you talk,that'll come across well to her. You'll be able to gauge the mood and if there's anything in it from her reaction.Maintain eye contact with her and if she's not avoiding it and if she laughs,jokes,touches your arm etc it's game on. But if you'll be blown out you'll know quickly.

Just be yourself,you're building it up on n your head too much. Be natural

DEFTLEFTHAND

This is so sweet.

Go for it OP, you've only another week there anyway so you have nothing to lose in asking.

Best of luck.

worded

To break the ice the old classic ...... “does this rag smell lke it has cloroforn on it”

vargoo

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

This is so sweet.

Go for it OP, you've only another week there anyway so you have nothing to lose in asking.

Best of luck.

This^^

If she says no, no loss.

You tried.

People don't try.

jmayo

munsterlegend wrote: »

Given all the grammatical errors I am more worried about the students.

Why does the line
"eats shoots and leaves"
come to mind ?;)

OP once you are sober and she isn't blotto chat her up.
Ya never know.
BTW it can make you look like a bit of a vulture if you are hitting on her drunk as a skunk and you are sober.

If she flatly make sit clear that there is nothing on then you could resort to plan B.
Idle up to one of the older single teachers and bob's your uncle so to speak.

wakka12

Just be fun and interesting and chatty with her and if she wants it to go that way then shell make it obvious

KevinCavan

Have you gotten any indication that she likes you as a person/love interest? Just be careful as any attraction you perceive she has towards you, could be all in your head.

brinty

No news is good news
He's on there.. well done lad

skooterblue2

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

Wait until Don't Stop Believin' by Journey comes on. It's a real dance floor filler. Then break out your best moves and shuffle over towards her during the guitar solo part.

What about three Dog night?

skooterblue2

brinty wrote: »

No news is good news
He's on there.. well done lad

I hope he furtled her proper before she turned into a pumpkin!! Its after midnight

He could also be arrested and down at the cop shop.

skooterblue2

I would start working my way from the bottom of the pile (separated 50's, no kids and loads of cats, Irish teacher) to the top of the pile (married 30, yummy mummy, science teacher) and starting shifting my way from the bottom to the top. She will be dead flattered when you ask her at the end!!!

Andrew00

Plough her ass for us OP, do us proud

orourkeda1977

Red Lightning wrote: »

I work in a secondary school and have a crush on one of my colleagues. I'm 25 and she's 22.

Ive gotten to speak to get a lot recently and would like to ask her out.

We have our Christmas party tomorrow evening and am wondering should I try and turn things a little flirtier than things have been or make any moves?

I don't drink so I will have my wit's about me but it also means I may not be three most confident.

Any suggestions on how to approach this? Thanks

Bring her home and lash her out of it

orourkeda1977

Andrew00 wrote: »

Plough her ass for us OP, do us proud

right deep in the plumbing

Andrew00

orourkeda1977 wrote: »

Bring her home and lash her out of it

Sure that’s not romantic enough for the liberal clowns on here, they’ll get you prison time for that

skooterblue2

One day you will be old, bitter, divorced, borderline alcoholic, on your third week of penecillin for an STI. You will eat christmas dinner alone with a sausage dog called Moses. It will be days like this you wished you ploughed her like a John Deere in the 1994 Ploughing Championships.

Red Lightning

Game over ball burst. One of the girls was asking if I fancied anyone and I said that I liked X and two days ago X was telling a few of the ladies that she was chatting a fella that she fancied. X also hasn't shown much interest in trying to get close to me over the night so she's probably not interested in me. Thanks for the advice anyway folks. Much appreciated.

Vita nova

I feel a lot of the advice here is motivated by vicariousness:D

skooterblue2

Its nights like this, where out on the moors I hear strange noises ...... I bring down a solitary glass, some of the finest Teachers whiskey and put on the VHS Tape "Fanny Adams" the directors cut.

skooterblue2

Red Lightning wrote: »

Game over ball burst. One of the girls was asking if I fancied anyone and I said that I liked X and two days ago X was telling a few of the ladies that she was chatting a fella that she fancied. X also hasn't shown much interest in trying to get close to me over the night so she's probably not interested in me. Thanks for the advice anyway folks. Much appreciated.

She is getting her beef else where back to pulling the pudding. Someone is a gettin' into her treacle pot tonight. Such a waste of two young fit bodies, flailing away with nothing between them but a thin coat of sweat. Makes me want to break out the ball gag, the thigh high boots and red lacy under wear and she could wear what ever she wanted.

worded

OP is the cop in hot persuit

Amazing chase this

https://www.facebook.com/uniaodocortee/videos/688903884781120/

Anyway at least you know it wasn’t to be rather than wondering forever

Edgware

Cockford Ollie wrote: »

This is an easy one. You will be sober and she will be drunk. Buy her lots of drinks over the course of the night. When the party comes to an end, make sure you keep in close proximity. When she is separated from the group, put her in a taxi, to your address. You get a second taxi and follow. The main thing to remember is that when she says no, she really means yes.

That's how I get all my women.

Where do you buy your cable ties and chloroform?

Edgware

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

This is so sweet.

Go for it OP, you've only another week there anyway so you have nothing to lose in asking.

Best of luck.

Maybe have a little gift for her.
A voucher for a "facial" snigger snigger

irishguitarlad

Op you should have tried anyways, sweet talked her out if it.

Edgware

irishguitarlad wrote: »

Op you should have tried anyways, sweet talked her out if it.

Maybe she wouldn't like to be labelled cradle snatcher

Red Lightning

irishguitarlad wrote:

Op you should have tried anyways, sweet talked her out if it.

She was hammered so wouldn't have went well I'm guessing.

irishguitarlad

Red Lightning wrote: »

She was hammered so wouldn't have went well I'm guessing.