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proverbs.

decky1

Anyone know any? When you meet a man with one leg it's very hard not to talk about shoes.:):)

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Birneybau

Walk a mile in someone else's shoes. That way, you have their shoes and you're a mile away from them.

[Deleted User]

en mangeant une banane, on se sait jamais oú regarder

Pinch Flat

Better up and tasted than down and wasted

Jim Bob Scratcher

Proverbs 9:10

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.

:pac:

Arghus

The higher the monkey climbs, the more you see of it's batty hole.

iirishsham40

Here's one I like about how being nice opens doors for you:

"You'll catch more butterflies with honey than you will with vinegar."

Are Am Eye

He who hesitates is lost.
Look before you leap.

Poor Uncle Tom

decky1 wrote: »

Anyone know any? When you meet a man with one leg it's very hard not to talk about shoes.:):)

A man with one very hard leg... Ooh er missus....

iirishsham40

decky1 wrote: »

Anyone know any? When you meet a man with one leg it's very hard not to talk about shoes.:):)

Do you mean:

He only has one leg?

You only have one leg?

He has two of his own legs but is carrying a leg as luggage?

You have two of your own legs but are carrying a leg as luggage?

Your Face

No, I'm antiverbs.

Mookie Blaylock

A stitch in time...gathers no moss

Fann Linn

He who goes to bed with itchy bum, wakes up next morning with smelly finger.

Day Lewin

Problem with the rat-race is, that even if you win it, you're still a rat.

snipey

Fann Linn wrote: »

He who goes to bed with itchy bum, wakes up next morning with smelly finger.

jesus

Hector Bellend

never stick a banger up your arse at halloween

Hector Bellend

Fann Linn wrote: »

He who goes to bed with itchy bum, wakes up next morning with smelly finger.

stop picking your hole then

mickrock

People who live in glasshouses shouldn't.

harry Bailey esq

Choose a family. Choose a ****ing big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed- interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suite on hire purchase in a range of ****ing fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing sprit- crushing game shows, stuffing ****ing junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing you last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, ****ed-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that?

I chose not to choose life: I chose something else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who need reasons when you've got heroin?

People think it's all about misery and desperation and death and all that ****e, which is not to be ignored, but what they forget is the pleasure of it. Otherwise we wouldn't do it. After all, we're not ****ing stupid. At least, we're not that ****ing stupid. Take the best orgasm you ever had, multiply it by a thousand and you're still nowhere near it. When you're on junk you have only one worry: scoring. When you're off it you are suddenly obliged to worry about all sorts of other ****e. Got no money: can't get pished. Got money: drinking too much. Can't get a bird: no chance of a ride. Got a bird: too much hassle. You have to worry about bills, about food, about some football team that never ****ing wins, about human relationships and all the things that really don't matter when you've got a sincere and truthful junk habit.

Relinquishing junk. Stage One: preparation. For this you will need: one room which you will not leave; one mattress; tomato soup, ten tins of; mushroom soup, eight tins of, for consumption cold; ice cream, vanilla, one large tub of; Magnesia, Milk of, one bottle; paracetamol; mouth wash; vitamins; mineral water; Lucozade; pornography; one bucket for urine, one for feces, and one for vomitus; one television; and one bottle of Valium, which I have already procured, from my mother, who is, in her own domestic and socially acceptable way, also a drug addict.
The down side of coming off junk was that I knew I would need to mix with my friends again in a state of full consciousness. It was awful: they reminded me so much of myself I could hardly bear to look at them. Take Sick Boy, for instance, he came off junk at the same time as me, not because he wanted too, you understand, but just to annoy me, just to show me how easily he could do it, thereby downgrading my own struggle. Sneaky ****er, don't you think? And when all I wanted to do was lie along and feel sorry for myself, he insisted on telling me once again about his unifying theory of life.
CHOOSE LIFE! LUST FOR IT!

sligojoek

After letting go a ripper of a fart in company: "An empty house is better than a bad lodger."

Victor

iirishsham40 wrote: »

He has two of his own legs but is carrying a leg as luggage?

And who used to own this leg?

snipey

wise men create proverbs and fools repeat them

Hector Bellend

sligojoek wrote: »

After letting go a ripper of a fart in company: "An empty house is better than a bad lodger."

Once you dont shart Then you'll actually have an empty house while youre cleaning your arse and kex.

ahnowbrowncow

sligojoek wrote: »

After letting go a ripper of a fart in company: "An empty house is better than a bad lodger."

You mustn't have read the Frederick St protest thread.

foxy farmer

He who dipeth his wick must payeth for the oil.

Thepillowman

Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.

decky1

iirishsham40 wrote: »

Do you mean:

He only has one leg?

You only have one leg?

He has two of his own legs but is carrying a leg as luggage?

You have two of your own legs but are carrying a leg as luggage?

you may be over thinking this one.;);)

Hector Savage

Virginity like balloon, one prick - all gone

valoren

I like "Never up, Never in" from Golf where you are putting but the ball never actually reaches the hole itself.

Statistically 100% of putts left short don't go in.

So the meaning for me is that while there is no actual guarantee of success (putts that reach the hole may not drop), you must make the best possible effort to succeed by ensuring you go past (the 110% effort) but at the same time, should you miss (i.e. fail) you can have no regrets because you gave it the best chance you could give to succeed. If you do anything half arsed, then you will always fail to realize your potential.

[Deleted User]

Some of my favorites:

A Friend's eye is a good mirror

It takes a wise man to play the fool

Beware the temper of the patient man

A winner never quits, a quitter never wins

Deebles McBeebles

Man with hand in pocket not necessarily looking for change