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How to prevent social media sharing of our wedding pics

dinnyhw

Getting married next year and would prefer if pictures of our wedding were not shared on social media. I have social media accounts, but don't post personal stuff. My other half is not on social media at all and really dislikes it.
We have been at two weddings in the last year where the couples asked for photos not to be shared, but their request was ignored. One couple had it on the invitation the others had a sign at the entrance to the church.

Anyone any tips on how to manage this? I know it's not something we can have total control over and some may just go ahead and post them anyway, but would like to keep it to a minimum if possible!

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meeeeh

eviltwin wrote: »

Unless you are tagging yourself as being at a particular wedding I can't see the problem. It's totally unreasonable to tell guests they can't post photos of themselves to their own account.

They can post photos of themselves I'm not bothered by it but for example I have friends who wouldn't want drunken photos of them to surface on social media. It could affect their business and as such I would much rather see less photos from the wedding on social media so everyone can relax.

What photos people take before or after is their own business.

Bacchus

eviltwin wrote: »

Unless you are tagging yourself as being at a particular wedding I can't see the problem. It's totally unreasonable to tell guests they can't post photos of themselves to their own account.

I also agree that that would be a step too far. Requesting no photos of the B&G/G&G/B&B or of the ceremony is a reasonable and fair request. I don't think you can go dictating that no photos at all can be posted though... unless you're some rockstar celeb with an OK magazine contract and your guests have to sign an NDA

dinnyhw

Thanks for all your replies.

It's certainly not something I am obsessing about and has nothing to do with being precious about approving pictures etc. I have no problem with guests posting pictures of themselves on the day.

This is my second time round. My first marriage break up was extremely painful and bitter. So like a previous poster mentioned, I don't want to attract the attention of ghosts of the past.

DaeryssaOne

meeeeh wrote: »

You are entitled to it, it would be just a bit self centred if you did it despite request. The couple might not want to advertise where their wedding was especially if it was more pricey venue or something similar.

As I said earlier, I have never been at a wedding where the guests were asked not to upload any pictures at all. If asked to specifically not include details of the venue etc

I wouldn't but would consider that to be the self-centred thing, like how important do you think you are that my friends would look at where I had been for a wedding and immediately jump to the expense of the venue?

wexie

dinnyhw wrote: »

Thanks for all your replies.

It's certainly not something I am obsessing about and has nothing to do with being precious about approving pictures etc. I have no problem with guests posting pictures of themselves on the day.

This is my second time round. My first marriage break up was extremely painful and bitter. So like a previous poster mentioned, I don't want to attract the attention of ghosts of the past.

Have a look through your SM account(s), at the very least you should be able to stop people tagging you in pictures (should the need arise) which will help with them gaining visibility.

verycool

wexie wrote: »

Have a look through your SM account(s), at the very least you should be able to stop people tagging you in pictures (should the need arise) which will help with them gaining visibility.

I think you can also approve of tags..? Is that still a thing?

Take 20 / 30 minutes to lock down your accounts privacy settings. Only thing you can do to look after yourself.

Hope you have a lovely day!

Bacchus

DaeryssaOne wrote: »

As I said earlier, I have never been at a wedding where the guests were asked not to upload any pictures at all. If asked to specifically not include details of the venue etc I wouldn't but would consider that to be the self-centred thing, like how important do you think you are that my friends would look at where I had been for a wedding and immediately jump to the expense of the venue?

People are complex beings. Their lives, their families, and their relationship are complex in ways you don't know about. Something trivial to you that appears self-centered, could be a real pressure point for them that is causing actual distress.

theyoungchap

jimmycrackcorm wrote: »

99 percent of the time it's because of bridezillaism.

No it isn't. Probably 1% of the time it is bridezillaism (bearing in mind it is a small percentage who don't want photos shared). 99% of the time it is a couple deciding they don't want your 1k friends, 990 of which they don't know, seeing photos of their wedding - if they wanted them to see their wedding day, they would have invited them themselves.

We didn't want photos shared and added a line to the wedding information sheet "We kindly request that people refrain from posting photographs of our wedding to Facebook/Twitter/etc".

Everybody respected it and not 1 picture was shared.

JayRoc

meeeeh wrote: »

They can post photos of themselves I'm not bothered by it but for example I have friends who wouldn't want drunken photos of them to surface on social media. It could affect their business and as such I would much rather see less photos from the wedding on social media so everyone can relax.

What photos people take before or after is their own business.

At my stags, I think my best man (who warned everyone ahead of time) collected phones off everyone a few minutes into the night. A nice sober group picture was taken and then mobiles away.

We had a lot of people like teachers, youth coaches, a garda, etc there and it just meant everyone could relax and go a bit nuts without being afraid it would end up on facebook... and besides, it made for much better craic without people checking their fecking phones every two minutes.

splinter65

ARNOLD J RIMMER wrote: »

Is a wedding not a private event where guests are invited?

Weddings are public events by law.

ARNOLD J RIMMER

splinter65 wrote: »

Weddings are public events by law.

i didnt know that

splinter65

What seems to be popular is if the B&G set up a special closed Facebook group for wedding guests only and all the pics are posted there.
Details of the Facebook page are included on the invite.

woodchuck

splinter65 wrote: »

What seems to be popular is if the B&G set up a special closed Facebook group for wedding guests only and all the pics are posted there.
Details of the Facebook page are included on the invite.

I was just about to suggest this! I was at a wedding a couple of years ago and they did this. I can't know for sure obviously, but it seemed to work out well. People still got to share their pictures, but only in the private group/page where only other guests could see the photos.

It might be a good compromise OP?

dinnyhw

Yes, the closed group is certainly something I will consider. I know that some will probably still be posted, but would just like to minimise it.

Thanks for the suggestion.

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theyoungchap

dinnyhw wrote: »

Yes, the closed group is certainly something I will consider. I know that some will probably still be posted, but would just like to minimise it.

Thanks for the suggestion.

Don't even bother, just say you don't want photos shared and anybody who does, after such a warning, is a **** and is not much of a friend. If I had seen anybody posting pictures of my wedding I would not have thought for 1 second about calling them out and asking them to take them down.

Effects

Wabbit Ears wrote: »

You can ask but no-one is under any sort of obligation to respect those wishes.

If you ask someone to follow a simple request at your wedding then they shouldn't have to be under an obligation, it's just common courtesy.

Effects

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What if someone climbed over your back fence, took photos of you sunbathing and posted them to a forum where you didn't know they were posted. Is that ok as you don't know about it?

woodchuck

dinnyhw wrote: »

Yes, the closed group is certainly something I will consider. I know that some will probably still be posted, but would just like to minimise it.

Thanks for the suggestion.

And if anyone does still post photos publically, they would have done so anyway no matter what you had done. Unfortunately all you can do is make the request, but you can't enforce it. I think a closed group should help minimise public photos though!

Art McCarrick

Get the priest or celebrant or whoever just to make an announcement at the start before she walks down the aisle something along the lines of "there's professional photographers here to document today, you won't get a better picture on your iPhone so keep the phones away and enjoy the occasion." I've seen that done and it works very well. Means there isn't a sea of camera phones pointing at the bride when she enters either. You can get people to sign something or have it in the wedding booklet but it's hard to beat just having someone say it for imapact.

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[Deleted User]

I don't even want people posting any pictures of me on social media, ever.
I'm not interested in having pics of myself on the internet. The amount of people who seem to think that there is something wrong with that is shocking!

Ask your guests not to post pics of the bride & groom, tell them they can post all the pics of themselves they want!

lawred2

dinnyhw wrote: »

Getting married next year and would prefer if pictures of our wedding were not shared on social media. I have social media accounts, but don't post personal stuff. My other half is not on social media at all and really dislikes it.
We have been at two weddings in the last year where the couples asked for photos not to be shared, but their request was ignored. One couple had it on the invitation the others had a sign at the entrance to the church.

Anyone any tips on how to manage this? I know it's not something we can have total control over and some may just go ahead and post them anyway, but would like to keep it to a minimum if possible!

invite nobody to the wedding - that should do it

Effects

....... wrote: »

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It's about what someone would want at the end of the day.

Why can't someone just respect the wishes of the person whose wedding it is?

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theyoungchap

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That is not any more OK than his original example. People are entitled to privacy.

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theyoungchap

....... wrote: »

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There is no difference, they are still sharing photos of your wedding day which you'd rather they didn't.

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