JohnnyFlash wrote: » You kind of do though. And you have to give 150 as a gift if you’re single, or 300 if you’re a couple. They are nearly always a complete waste of a day. As I said, the only positive is that there’s a decent chance you’ll chat up a bird later on in the evenings, and retire to the massively overpriced room for a bit of the beast with two backs.
knucklehead6 wrote: » Ahhh We get to the point of the thread... Johnny Flash is wealthy and needed to show it
qwerty ui op wrote: » Simply not true. My OH was been in the same job for the last 5 years during that time she has obviously made work friends, 4 or 5 of those have been very good to her over that time. One of those friends(really sound girl) is to get married in 2 months, all she can talk about for the last few months is the wedding. If my OH doesn't go to the wedding it will certainly mean the end of the friendship. If we don't go as a couple it will also cause problems. This is how weddings work. How is the problem solved by simply not going?
LirW wrote: » I always get the cringe when people give out about what they "have" to give. If you only can afford to give a box of biscuits, then give that. If you wanna get them a Tipperary crystal vase, do that. Sure, cash makes sense because they can do whatever, but the couple can't act like ar5ehole royalty when they get some picture frame or so.
Spanish Eyes wrote: » A colleague had an "old fashioned" wedding breakfast/lunch thing last year. It was a small affair of about 25 people. (family only, so I wasn't one of them!) Registry office around midday, off to long lunch somewhere can't remember think it was Schoolhouse. B+G legged it at 6pm and left a tab at the bar. No band or music either. Now that sounds ideal to me! Retro weddings, please come back! But I reckon that type of wedding would really only suit small gatherings, but still.....
murpho999 wrote: » This gift thing does annoy me. You do not have to give €150. Why would you? I have gone to plenty of weddings and given €100 as a couple and not been an issue. How can people complain about a gift? I've heard other people justifying by saying well the couple are paying for your food etc but I think that's rubbish. You should be invited as you mean something to them and they want you to be part of their day and not just be a cash cow. Weddings should be viewed as one of those occasions in life that cost money.Years ago people just got household stuff as presents so where does this ridiculous idea of €150 a head come from?[/QUOTE] Since weddings got bigger and flashier and turned into three ring circuses. Expectations around the gift have also grown. Obviously we're all eejits to go along with it, but at the same time no one wants to be seen as the miser who only gave forty euro.
LirW wrote: » We're having that, casual gathering with 18 people, registry office and some fancy early dinner in a function room with a private bar. They'll kick us out at 11 latest, whoever wants to go can go, no obligations. It's kind of nice keeping the timeline open to see what happens. Wedding car is probably going to be a Dublin taxi :pac:
Malayalam wrote: » Hate them. Ran off and got married in secret abroad myself and saved everyone the bother. And the siblings and in laws had very quiet, lovely, low-key affairs. I cannot understand people shelling out that much money - you could have a fab holiday every year for a couple of decades with that amount of dosh! And probably love each other all the more because of it. The few I have been to seemed super stressful for at least the bride - plus the make-up, Jesus Christ, what's going on there!
marvin80 wrote: » Biggest load of sh*t ever: - People having a big church wedding even though they haven't been in the church in years and then expect you to do the same. - Then you have the hassle of driving to the church and to the hotel afterwards - couple of hours driving if you're not living in the same town as the church or hotel. - Cheap, miserable cu*ts having their wedding on a Thursday (Friday isn't as bad) and you've to take a few days off work for it. Have a friend tell me he was doing this on purpose, cheaper but they'll still make loads of money from gifts. - So much waiting around between the church, hotel, dinner etc.. - Speeches are usually sh*t - go on for ages and loads of in-jokes that no-one outside the immediate family get. - Music is usually sh*t. - Spending 30k on a piss-up - most people starting married life in debt because of it - idiots. - Spending stupid money on stuff like the engagement rings - even though their real value is only about a 10th of the actual price. - The traditions like asking the father of the bride for permission to marry his daughter or giving her away like she's a commodity.
qwerty ui op wrote: » Simply not true. My OH was been in the same job for the last 5 years during that time she has obviously made work friends, 4 or 5 of those have been very good to her over that time. One of those friends(really sound girl) is to get married in 2 months, all she can talk about for the last few months is the wedding. If my OH doesn't go to the wedding it will certainly mean the end of the friendship. If we don't go as a couple it will also cause problems. This is how weddings work...
Spanish Eyes wrote: » Congratulations and best of luck for your day. Sounds great!
Zebra3 wrote: » Couldn’t agree more with all that. The stench of hypocrisy of non-religious people getting married in a church and starting their life with vows intertwined with lies. And the stench of hypocrisy in the (usually) RC Church in staging the wedding of people who don’t give a toss about its’ “values”, but hey, it’s €300 tax-free payment for them. I mean, “voluntary donation”!!!!!! :rolleyes: And lest we forget the bride turning up late cause you know, “she’s important”. Was at one wedding where she was over 40 minutes late. Very close to walking out on that one. And as for the wedding on a Thursday.... I have actually heard people say they plan to get married on a Thursday because they expect people to take two days holidays for their gig.
Meadow Freezing Newsman wrote: » I know people involved in the Church and believe me, they would far prefer if couples to whom the sacrament is meaningless didn't partake in it, just using the Church as a pretty and traditional back drop for their 'big day'. The donation goes towards the upkeep of the church, cleaning it, maintaining the organ and the red carpet, heating the church if it's Winter and so on. It's not a profit making exercise.
Zebra3 wrote: » LOL. Of course not.
LirW wrote: » Thanks! I don't really see why I should play the game, I wouldn't feel comfortable. I rather have a fancy dinner with my closest because I love food and want to spoil them too. It's sad that a lot of women especially are lured into the whole thing and everything has to be an experience. The make-up trial, the hair trial, the dress shopping experience where people spend morbid money on dresses they wear for a few hours. Perfume experiences, wedding fairs, wedding magazines, fancy car for the trip, wedding stylist for the latest trend look to score a few pins on Instagram. Honeymoon for crazy money right after it. It's just completely missing the point somehow.
iamwhoiam wrote: » How was it worded as a matter of interest ?
murpho999 wrote: » Mmm. I had that too, wonder was it the same wedding? Bank holiday weekend in Gorey?
erica74 wrote: » Why don't the churches just refuse to marry these people then?
iamwhoiam wrote: » You dont have to play any game at all .No one is forcing you but why criticise others for doing what they feel is what they would like ? You enjoy your way and let others enjoy their way
