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Are you punching above your weight?

Bambi985

I see this mentioned a lot about/to guys about their girlfriends and it's something I've experienced myself in relationships. I always thought it was quite rude. Imagine saying the same to a woman and implying that her fella is way hotter than her? There'd be blue murder!

What I've observed that it's not actually factual or true in most cases either. John Krasinski mentioned it recently about being married to Emily Blunt. She is undeniably gorgeous. But he is also a big ride. He is nowhere near 'average' and I'd say 99.99% of women would be staring him out of it in most rooms he'd walk into. Similarly, Laura Whitmore and her Scottish comedian fella. He's a bit of a ride too. And also far more charismatic and full of personality than her.

I've so many real-life examples with couples I know too, where she's pretty in a girl-next-door kinda way and he's quite attractive too, yet he gets the "way out of your league" comments. It's weird.

Anyone else got experiences with this? Are you told it about your OH? Does someone tell you your fella is "dating up"?

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banie01

Yep, both my LTR's are considerably out of my league

Not that I'm ugly....
Just they really are considerably hotter than me.
It is mentioned fairly regularly too.

I dont take any offence as it segues nicely into my sexual prowess and well proportioned genitals!

Bambi985

banie01 wrote: »

Yep, both my LTR's are considerably out of my league
Not that I'm ugly....
Just they really are considerably hotter than me.
It is mentioned fairly regularly too.

I dont take any offence as it segues nicely into my sexual prowess and well proportioned genitals!

According to who though? Do women generally find you attractive?

GypsyByName

banie01 wrote: »

Yep, both my LTR's are considerably out of my league
Not that I'm ugly....
Just they really are considerably hotter than me.
It is mentioned fairly regularly too.

I dont take any offence as it segues nicely into my sexual prowess and well proportioned genitals!

What is an LTR?

Jim Bob Scratcher

Hang on, I'll just ask my hand

jimgoose

I can't say I've ever encountered it, no. Because I am a near-perfect physical specimen, tall and ruggedly handsome, and with a schlong on me like a tower-crane operator's Thermos.

jimgoose

GypsyByName wrote: »

What is an LTR?

Long-Term Ride.

AllForIt

Is this a fairly well veiled 'culture' thread.

banie01

Bambi985 wrote: »

According to who though? Do women generally find you attractive?

According to my peer group most often and random strangers on occasion.
I don't know how attractive women find me to be honest?
I suppose that if/when I was chasing company I was generally successful but I put that down to a combination of persistance and rohypnol....
I mean charm!

James Bond Junior

Outta my league? I am the league baby!!

banie01

jimgoose wrote: »

Long-Term Ride.

Best Backronym ever! :pac:

wakka12

Yeh I see that a lot. Usually in a jokey way..lots of guys when they meet their mates new girlfriend theyre like what are you doin with him! Kind of making fun of him, even if hes just as attracitve as her
I do see it a lot but its pretty light hearted I think, dont genuinely mean shes way better looking than him, kind of more meant as a way of saying shes pretty than anything else.

Ive never heard anyone say the same to a woman. It would come across badly and not in the same light hearted way I would imagine

Mickeroo

GypsyByName wrote: »

What is an LTR?

Google tells me it either means Long Terminal Repeats or Loan against Trust Receipt. Their post makes total sense now I'm sure.

[Deleted User]

If it were acceptable in society for men to wear make-up, and it was a desirable look (think Korean Pop and TV), the comments would be a lot more even between the sexes.

DaeryssaOne

As a woman I have been upset in the past by more than one person (men and women) remarking on the handsomeness of my husband and how I must have been a looker when we first met to say he was still with me. In fairness I do consider him to be a ride but to be told I was punching was really hurtful to me.

He assured me it was not the case but his good looks were commented on a lot by different people and instead of being proud of my partner I actually got a complex that everyone was wondering what the hell he was doing with the likes of me.

I've gotten over that in recent years, not sure if I've improved in my own mind or if he's gone downhill but I consider us to be a lot more equal now :pac:

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

facehugger99

Men are judged on whether they can attract and retain a good mating partner, far more than women are.

That's why it would generally be considered a complement for a man to be told he's punching above his weight.

Plus, it sounds less creepy than saying " wow, your wife's really hot".

B.A._Baracus

Anyone who says it is just a jealous bastard.

ReReginald Perrin

It's nonsense really. People tend to end up with people they are similar to in looks. Money or status can get you a better looking partner but generally speaking, for those of us that aren't rich and famous, yes, you end up with someone in your own league.

dr.fuzzenstein

I have the most awesome woman in the world who I am absolutely not worthy of.
I don't know what I have done to deserve such a fantastic person, she is just the best.
She completes my life and me as a person. And she feels the same about me.
We're not Brad and Angelina and we couldn't give a sh*te.
Would I rather have a woman that is rated to be 10/10 lookswise? Would she rather be with Channing Tatum?
Not in a million years. My now-wife, before we met (long story, 30 years long and longer in fact), told me she is not some painted up dolly-bird.
And it's true, she's a jeans and tshirt woman and if she wears makeup it's for a special occasion. And I love it.
Going out with someone for their looks, well, it's a clichee, but book and cover is a clichee for a reason.
I need to be with someone who understands my crazyness and my nerdiness and I couldn't live with someone who just embodies perfection, it would drive me nuts. To quote Deadpool, her crazy matches my crazy perfectly.
Yes I would crawl over any amount of naked women for her.

ReReginald Perrin

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

This woman we've never even heard a smidgen about before sounds amazing!

ReReginald Perrin

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

I have the most awesome woman in the world who I am absolutely not worthy of.

that mindset is very unhealthy

razorblunt

100%

I'm unreal in the sack though so it balances out ...

I can eat crisps with no spillage

gmisk

razorblunt wrote: »

100%

I'm unreal in the sack though so it balances out ...

Me too! I won the sack race pretty much every year in school!

TBH id say my other half is a lot hotter than me but hey beauty is in the eye of the beholder etc.

dr.fuzzenstein

ReReginald Perrin wrote: »

that mindset is very unhealthy

Hey, I'm the doctor here! :P

gmisk

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Hey, I'm the doctor here! :P

And how does that make you feel?

I see hmmmmm interesting #scribbles on pad#

[Deleted User]

I was without a doubt punching in my last relationship. She was a high fashion model. My friends were more impressed with the situation than I was. She's just a normal person like everyone else. It was very annoying when we broke up because she did a job with Dunnes around the same time so there was enormous posters of her all over the place. Not ideal when your trying to move on :pac:

GypsyByName

Deleted User wrote: »

I was without a doubt punching in my last relationship. She was a high fashion model. My friends were more impressed with the situation than I was. She's just a normal person like everyone else. It was very annoying when we broke up because she did a job with Dunnes around the same time so there was enormous posters of her all over the place. Not ideal when your trying to move on :pac:

Not exactly high fashion is it? Still impressive nonetheless!

_Dara_

My poor husband is definitely not, lumbered as he is with a terminally-ill wife whose treatment, reduced movement (out of necessity) and lack of motivation (no worrying about future health) has meant she is a lot less attractive than she was when we met seven years ago. The guilt is significant on top of everything else.

The Backwards Man

I used to have a girlfriend, but I guess she couldn't compete with all the love-starved women who keep clamouring at my feet.

banie01

_Dara_ wrote: »

My poor husband is definitely not, lumbered as he is with a terminally-ill wife whose treatment, reduced movement (out of necessity) and lack of motivation (no worrying about future health) has meant she is a lot less attractive than she was when we met seven years ago. The guilt is significant on top of everything else.

As long as you can still take the time to be together and make memories.
AH is usually the place for a witty answer

But.
I lost my 1st wife 11yrs ago next week.
I spent a long long time angry at the world for taking her from me, for robbing me of our future....
It took me a long time to appreciate how lucky I was to have had 11yrs with a wonderful woman in the 1st place.
I hope that you both can build a treasury of memories together.
A treasury that will help more than you know on the dark days still to come.
Both for you, and for him.

AH answer!
Paaaaaah Buzzkill!!!!