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How would you feel if your partner turned out to be transgender?

wakka12

I seem to be in the minority of people who wouldn't mind. Im gay but if I had a boyfriend and found out he was born a girl, I can't say it'd bother me , so long as the had all their working parts.. And I don't particularly understand why it'd bother people if you like them and are attracted to them currently, but it does bother a lot of people clearly, so I am genuinely curious to hear people's reasons why.
Id be very interested to hear about their life before and how they used to look etc..but I can't imagine Id feel any disgust or lesser attraction just because of what they used to be or look like

And do you think a trans person should be obliged to tell you they are trans if you get into a relationship with somebody?
No need to for anything nasty to be said

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The Legend Of Kira

On a serious note I wouldn,t date someone if I knew they were transgender to begin with,, but to answer the hypothetical question posed by the OP "" How would you feel if your partner turned out to transgender ? "" Id prob feel deceived & pi**** off to be quite honest- it be end of relationship altogether for good- Id wonder if the person lied about 1 aspect of their past,, what other aspects of their past could they be lying about too also ?

Hitman3000

wakka12 wrote:

No need to for anything nasty to be said

Yet you posted in AH.........

eviltwin

I wouldn't like it if my husband did a Caitlyn Jenner. I'd support him and he'd still be my best mate but I would have to grieve for the man I lost if that makes sense. I don't know if I'd be as attracted to him as a woman

I wouldn't have an issue with a new partner being transgender though. I'd never see that as a reason to discount someone. It wouldn't bother me at all.

Pawwed Rig

It'd be a dealbreaker for me. I just wouldn't be attracted to them after finding out and would be fairly peeved that they entered the relationship under false pretenses.

The Backwards Man

I'd be like the Flintstones.

_Dara_

I’d mind. I’d very much mind. Good luck to transgender folk but I only want men who were always men. The relationship would be over.

Working class heroes

Wouldn’t bother me in the slightest. Not one bit.

JenovaProject

_Dara_ wrote: »

I’d mind. I’d very much mind. Good luck to transgender folk but I only want men who were always men. The relationship would be over.

Totally agree.
Except I only want women who were always women.

TheDavester

The Backwards Man wrote: »

I'd be like the Flintstones.

Yabba Dabba Doo?

The Backwards Man

TheDavester wrote: »

Yabba Dabba Doo?

Having a gay old time.

Sounds a lot better in my head than having to write it out though in fairness.

clairewithani

I thought I was very accepting and broad minded but it appears I am not. It would be a deal breaker for me. I wouldn't be able to get past that.

LadyMacBeth_

I'm bi-sexual so it wouldn't make any difference to me. I'd be annoyed if someone kept it from me for a long time though because that's deceitful. I do think it's best to be up front with a partner early on if you are transgender to avoid any confrontations later on.

_Kaiser_

wakka12 wrote: »

Fair enough.And how would you feel about a woman who had significant plastic surgery and wanted to change how she looked, for whatever reason, would you still like her if you found out she used to look very different. For the sake of argument pretend the extensive plastic surgery didn't make her look weird as in you wouldn't have known she had surgery when you met her

Not the same at all TBH, but no that wouldn't bother me.

If the idea is to get me to say that I'd be "discriminatory" against transgender partners - absolutely! Their life, their choice and that's fair enough, but it doesn't mean I have to personally be involved with them.

AttentionBebe

I'd wonder what paraphernalia "she" used to get me pregnant twice

wakka12

_Kaiser_ wrote: »

Not the same at all TBH, but no that wouldn't bother me.

If the idea is to get me to say that I'd be "discriminatory" against transgender partners - absolutely! Their life, their choice and that's fair enough, but it doesn't mean I have to personally be involved with them.

No i think its perfectly reasonable. I was just wondering what people's reasons were

jimmycrackcorm

I'd be bitterly disappointed if the result was that she didn't turn out to look like a Thai ladyboy at the end of the process...

DEFTLEFTHAND

AttentionBebe wrote: »

I'd wonder what paraphernalia "she" used to get me pregnant twice

Turkey baster?

greencap

The relationship would be off instantly.

There'd be a distinct possibility of violence.

I know thats not a fashionable thing to say but thats how I'd react.

Even moreso in the case of some kind of one night action/surprise. There'd be no feelings there so I'd most likely beat the bejesus out of them.

I'll probably be alone in that opinion on the forum, but I can assure you a high percentage of men would react the same. So be up front about it.

CarlosHarpic

Dump them.

Junkyard Tom

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x3BY72RF8vc

Ubbquittious

I'd think I was an awful eejit not to notice. Is it even feasible for a transgender person to cod a partner into believing they're not transgender?

O'Neill

What the hell is this websites obsession with gender recently, it's a bit odd

shamrock55

If my wife of 14 yrs told me she used to be a bloke id fcuk him straight out the door and then wonder how my kids were born

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

I’d lose the plot and it’d be the end of the relationship

Yer Da sells Avon

I think hiding something like that for a long time would require a lot of dishonesty, so I'd probably feel very upset and hurt, not just about the lying, but about the fact that she didn't trust me enough to tell me about a very significant part of her past. Maybe I'd get over it, I don't know.

However, if I was just dating someone, and was already attracted to her, and she told me that she was transgender, it wouldn't be a deal-breaker. I'm fairly sure I'd be ok with it.

Mellor

seenitall wrote: »

Tbh, I think it would be well nigh impossible to "surprise" me in that manner. Men have Adam's apples, women don't, men and women's bones structures (think shoulders) and where the fat lands on them are different, not to mention the muscle systems, hair growth patterns, or voice difference

None of those apply is people transition early in life.
Adams apple, lol. You are thinking of transvestites.

Just look at someone like Chaz Bono, if you are observant enough, there will be MANY giveaways. I really don't think that someone born as a woman could fool me for very long. Talking on average of course. Of course, there are exceptions to every rule, but I do think in this instance they would be rare.

Chaz Bono transitioned at 40 years or so.
I understood the OP to be asking about somebody who transitioned much younger. Say boy who transitioned to female pre-puberty.

[Deleted User]

Wouldn't care after seven years together.

suicide_circus

I'm attracted to the opposite sex so that would be a deal breaker.

TerrorFirmer

Ubbquittious wrote: »

I'd think I was an awful eejit not to notice. Is it even feasible for a transgender person to cod a partner into believing they're not transgender?

Not even remotely really when it comes to certain physical anatomy.

Pepefrogok

Love how the really progressive are signalling their virtue by saying it wouldn't bother them one bit haha, sure I can believe that some might learn to live with it but not to be bothered one bit about what you thought was a vagina actually being a inside out penis??