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How much is acceptable for a Hen Weekend?

CheerLouth

Hi Guys,

As the title says, how much is the average cost of a hen weekend? My sister is getting married next year & wants to go somewhere down the country & generally be made a fuss of. She would like a spa day or a treasure hunt.

I've had a quick look & one option in Kilkenny for two nights for roughly ten people was working out at over 250 a head plus a 300deposit in the hotel (obviously to make sure we don't wreck the place). I'm flabbergasted at the price! I really hate the thoughts of having to ask people to spend a lot of money when they still have the wedding to go to!

I've also never been on a hen weekend before so don't know what is the average is for this sort of thing!

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scarepanda

I wouldn't pay that much for a hen tbh.

How many would be going? Could you look into hiring out self catering houses? I was at a hen a few years ago in Kilkenny and we stayed just outside the city in holiday apartments and for two nights it was a lot cheaper than that.

GalwayGrrrrrl

The last hen I went on was around 100 for one night B and B and one activity (boat trip). I wouldn't pay more for a hen, given the wedding is a huge expense too.

lazygal

I wouldn't go away for a hen full stop. I think it's utterly pointless, you're already getting married which is celebration enough IMO. What's wrong with a dinner and a few drinks?!

stargazer 68

Take a look at the hillgrove in monaghan. Around 150 for 2 nights b and b and 1 dinner. You can add in extras from a huge list- spa treatments, afternoon tea etc . We have been twice and its lovely.

Was at a hen in Galway and some girls did 2 nights and some came just for the Sat

Pistachios & cream

The max i would pay for a 2 night hen is €200 and it would have to be a very good friend. Ideally i prefer a one night hen, my weekends are precious and having the whole weeknd gone for a hen is too much.

The last 2 nighter i did was for a very close friend and cost €165 for 2 nights b&b and an evening meal. The hotel was very basic for this.
I'd be happy to spend about €150 - 165 for 1 night B&B and meal in a nicer place. Thats about the norm in my group.

GingerLily

Could you do a Spa night on Friday for family and bridal party and then have the rest of the group come down on Saturday for a big night out in Kilkenny.

It would keep costs down for the other few girls and would mean the bride still gets her spa day?

Under 200 for accommodation meals and activities for 2 nights would be limit for a CLOSE friend.

Thoie

€50 a head, early bird dinner locally with a bottle of wine.

maisiedaisy

I think that depends a lot on your friend group to be honest. I found similar prices to what you mentioned when I was looking into my own hen party.

I’m one of the first of my friend group to get married, and everyone is excited and it’s all a bit of a novelty. I can see in 3 or 4 years time none of us would be happy to be paying that. I’m giving everyone the option of coming for one or two nights, and taking part in whichever activities they want to. So if cost is an issue, it’s up to them how much they spend. Maybe that’s something you could do, or let people choose their own spa treatments so if they like they can choose a cheaper one? On top of that, I think that an invite to a hen is just that; an invite, and not a summons. People can decide to not attend if they feel it’s not something they want to spend money on.

Another thing, and I realise this is a bit specific, is that I’d happily spend more on what I’d consider a nicer weekend. At my cousin’s hen, we stayed in a very dodgy hotel. No locks on the bedroom doors, lights not working, toilets not flushing...and it was still €200 for 2 nights and activity, so not exactly cheap. I just felt it was a real waste of money because where we were staying was so bad. If I knew it was going to be a great weekend, good accommodation and activities I’d enjoy, I’d happily pay more.

CheerLouth

Thanks everyone for the replies! As I said, I've only just started looking. Kilkenny had struck me as not too far for everyone to travel to.

I'd agree with staying local if it was my hen...but it's not. I'll shop around & see what other options are out there.

Malari

2 nights would be too much for me, regardless of the cost!

Last one of these I did was a night in beautiful old country house, including afternoon tea, some sort of sparkly wine reception, 4 course dinner and breakfast the next morning, for only €110.

scarke1

We did a night in our home in Dublin and a night in Kilkenny in Lyrath Spa Resort. Worked out at 200 per person (15 people in total)...highly recommend it. also inc in the price was the Cube in Kilkenny and a dinner in Lyrath...

[Deleted User]

I do a bit of weekend breaks with my wife. The average price for a 4 star hotel is 400 for both of us inc breakfast.

lazygal

If your sister wants all this, why isn't she paying for it? Not being funny, but she'll be expecting people to attend a wedding in a few months, having already asked them to spend money on a weekend away. I don't like hen parties anyway, but the weekends away because a bride wants a fuss made aren't how I want to spend my money and time.

Thoie

Something else to note depends on the age/willingness of the invitees. A lot of these hen weekends are "sold" on the basis of "oh, it's only €150/€200" - but that's generally based on sharing a room, and doesn't include drinking/dining/other activities. Some people may be happy to share a room with an acquaintance, but don't assume that everyone is.

Last time I was invited to something like that I was told it would be €170 each. When I started looking at prices, it was going to come out around €600 when I factored in:
Single room supplement
Travel to the location
Taxis over the weekend
Lunches
Dinners (with the inevitable "the bride shouldn't pay for dinner")
Activities
Coffee here or there
Drinks

I had done the maths myself in advance, but a few people had taken the €170 at face value, and were taken aback over the weekend when they realised how much money they were going through. Depending on where the wedding is, people could easily be spending another €500+ in a few months time on the wedding itself, so you're coming close to asking your friends to spend €1,000+ on "your special day".

baby and crumble

Whoa that’s mad. I actually have no idea how much people spent on my hen, but I gave strict instructions that it wasn’t to be expensive. I didn’t pay for anything, which was so lovely. It does sound like my gang did a ace job, though. I believe they transferred cash into my best mans account and he then paid for everything on card, including food. We rented 2 holiday homes for the weekend and mostly ate there, big breakfast cooked etc. we only went out for one meal and that was included in the prepaid costs from each person. Most folks commented at the dinner that they’d need to pay separate and we’re quite shocked that everything was included in the budget they’d been told.

Then again we also didn’t go out to a nightclub or anything, we did some fun activities during the day that wouldn’t break the bank anyway, and nothing too “Henny”.

I’ve only ever attended 2 hen parties other than mine in my life though. Both were low key so I don’t think I was out more than €150 for each. Definitely less than that for one anyway.

Joe Exotic

CheerLouth wrote: »

Thanks everyone for the replies! As I said, I've only just started looking. Kilkenny had struck me as not too far for everyone to travel to.

I'd agree with staying local if it was my hen...but it's not. I'll shop around & see what other options are out there.

Try this place

http://www.nultyscottages.com/
Stayed there for the cats Laughs years ago with a group, its a bit outside the city so will require Taxi (Ten mins i think) but if i remember fairly reasonable price

mcgiggles

I had mine recently and I think it was just over 200 a head but that included 2 nights accommodation, 2 dinners, 2 breakfasts, for lunch on the Saturday we made sambos from the leftover breakfast, so paid for no food all weekend.. brought our own drinks for night in on Friday night. The price included an activity Saturday. So only thing had to pay for was a few drinks out on Saturday night! Feck all tho cos we drank our own drinks most of Saturday and wine was included in the dinner too.

miamee

I organised my sisters hen last year along with her best friend. We stayed 2 nights in a hotel in Galway on a bank holiday weekend, the package included one dinner, two breakfasts and we also included price of a private minibus there and back (from Dublin) and it worked out at €250 per person staying for two nights. People staying one night paid a good bit less and made their own way down on the second night. I did think €250 was a bit much for friends to be paying whereas for my sister I didn't mind.

A tip - if it's a big gang, don't give the option of two nights or one night to people. If the hen wants to go for 2 nights and the bridesmaids etc are going for two nights, it's a two night break. If anyone wants to go for one night let them organise it themselves. We wish we'd done this. Honestly, the amount of people dropping down to one night in the few weeks coming up to the weekend was a complete pain, you have to update the hotel every time. Stressful.

CheerLouth

Thanks again for all the tips and replies! I just wanted to get a feeling of how much these things normally are! I personally hate the idea of having to ask anyone to spend more than 100euro but I also want my sister to have a great time & everyone else to enjoy it too!

Ideally I'd like to get as much into the overall cost - dinners etc so that people don't have to put their hand in their pocket too much during the trip!

jlm29

Kilkenny is very central, but it’s very popular for hens, so accommodation is always pricey there. I’d look elsewhere for better value for a start! Avoid towns/cities that are very popular for hens/stags- Kilkenny, Killarney etc. As someone else has suggested- first night for bridal party and night two for everyone can work well. Two nights is a lot, and it will complicate things, because there will always be a percentage of people who won’t go for two nights, so it makes the maths more tricky if you book a package. Also be wary of packages- the worst hen party I was ever at was booked through a hen party company- it was desperate!

lalababa

Everyone down my way goes to st. Trope for a month dressed as a ****ing eejit and YOU PAY! Absolutely NOBODY does any different 'coz of soooo many reasons.
Funny I came across a special hen themed dildo lately and this post reminded me of it.

baby and crumble

lalababa wrote: »

Funny I came across a special hen themed dildo lately

Phrasing.

El Weirdo

lazygal wrote: »

... I don't like hen parties anyway, but the weekends away because a bride wants a fuss made aren't how I want to spend my money and time.

Yes. You said.

Electric Sheep

miamee wrote: »

A tip - if it's a big gang, don't give the option of two nights or one night to people. If the hen wants to go for 2 nights and the bridesmaids etc are going for two nights, it's a two night break. If anyone wants to go for one night let them organise it themselves. We wish we'd done this. Honestly, the amount of people dropping down to one night in the few weeks coming up to the weekend was a complete pain, you have to update the hotel every time. Stressful.

Attendance will almost certainly take a deep dive if one night is not an option. Most people I know would not want to attend a two night hen party, especially if they have kids themselves.

Faith

I attended two hens this summer. One I was a bridesmaid for. It was 2 nights in an expensive seaside town. I initially thought it was too expensive - it was €240 for two nights shared accommodation, 2x breakfast, 1x lunch, 1x dinner, activity and drinks through the day until the dinner the second night. In the end, though, it was worth it. The other bridesmaids (I had nothing to do with organisation!) bought SO MUCH booze. We were never left with an empty glass, the activities and props were great and overall it was such fun.

The second hen was similar in many ways. It cost about the same, and was 2 nights shared accommodation and a similar activity. For this one though, breakfast was so basic, the rooms were all double only so I had to share a BED and there was fûck all alcohol provided - like, 2 glasses of prosecco during the entire day. I enjoyed it, but I'm resentful of how much it cost me and I didn't feel like it was worth half what I paid.

I suppose my point is, if you're asking people to pay a lot of money, make sure it includes as much as possible and be honest about the costs. There's no point in saying "This will cost X but you also have to pay for a million other things".

CheerLouth

Thanks Faith! That's my plan - try to incorporate as much cost as possible (without it being too high) so that people don't have to put their hand in their pocket so much over the actual weekend!

I think it will prob only be a one nighter as most of the invitees have young families & no one really wants to be away for two nights I think.

I've gotten a couple of better prices - as I said I've only started. Thanks all!

baby and crumble

I'd also caution against saying you're looking for a hen party- prices get hiked immediately because all this extra crap is automatically included that you mightn't even want. It means more organisation for the bridesmaids etc but it might work out in the long run.

splinter65

Does no one else agree that these type of hen nights might have been relevant when the bride was almost always a 19 year old virgin leaving her mam and dads house to get married, but that now it’s just part of the cookie cutter style of the modern Irish wedding to be ticked of the checklist and endured rather than enjoyed by the already stressed bride and her friends?
Isn’t dinner and a show with drinks and a minibus/stretch limo there and back more enjoyable and appropriate, rather then penny pinching and sweating over a 2 night very inconvenient marathon only a few weeks before a 2 night wedding party?
Just me?

miamee

splinter65 wrote: »

Does no one else agree that these type of hen nights might have been relevant when the bride was almost always a 19 year old virgin leaving her mam and dads house to get married, but that now it’s just part of the cookie cutter style of the modern Irish wedding to be ticked of the checklist and endured rather than enjoyed by the already stressed bride and her friends?
Isn’t dinner and a show with drinks and a minibus/stretch limo there and back more enjoyable and appropriate, rather then penny pinching and sweating over a 2 night very inconvenient marathon only a few weeks before a 2 night wedding party?
Just me?

For some people dinner and a show or drinks would be preferable (maybe even formyself if and when I'm getting married) but taking the opportunity to spend more than a few hours out with your closest female friends and relatives is not something to be looking down your nose at, in my opinion. For some it might be the only time they get to have such a weekend away and they take the opportunity. I'm not one for the dressing up or the willie straws and L-plates, I dislike all that but for a girls weekend to make a close friend or relative feel special, have fun with their friends and look forward to her wedding, I'll put up with it and do my best to make sure they have a good time.

Malari

miamee wrote: »

For some people dinner and a show or drinks would be preferable (maybe even formyself if and when I'm getting married) but taking the opportunity to spend more than a few hours out with your closest female friends and relatives is not something to be looking down your nose at, in my opinion. For some it might be the only time they get to have such a weekend away and they take the opportunity. I'm not one for the dressing up or the willie straws and L-plates, I dislike all that but for a girls weekend to make a close friend or relative feel special, have fun with their friends and look forward to her wedding, I'll put up with it and do my best to make sure they have a good time.

I agree with this. If I was invited to a hen of a bride I didn't know very well, whatever she was doing, whether a dinner and drinks, or a night away, I would probably find it torturous and decline.

But the celebrations of my close friends have been fantastic. Again, the scale of the event was less important than the group of people having fun together.