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Subtle ways to annoy someone

Feckoffcup

Looking to get back at a particularly nasty individual. I want it leave no suspicions it was me. Obviously nothing sinister just a way of fcking up their day.

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chopperbyrne

Get ketchup sachets from a fast food place, and smear it under their car door handles.

5rtytry56

Haters gonna hate.
OP, if any trick or treaters call to the door tomorrow, don't open it. Watch telly with the sound all the way up.

5rtytry56

jimmynokia wrote: »

The saying "The taste of your own medicine is never good" comes to mind,thats how i generally deal with stuff like this.

Take your own medicine first, OP.

maudgonner

Replace all their coffee & tea with decaf. Or if they already use decaf, replace with caffeinated. Full-fat milk with low-fat etc.

Get your phone/laptop to emit a low-pitched hum, or a high-pitched whine in their vicinity. When they ask what the noise is claim you can't hear a thing.

Every time they tell a story, tell one that's very similar but slightly better. They tell a story about someone they know who won the Lotto? You know someone who won the Euromillions. They have a friend who has malaria? You've got one who has leprosy. They met Martin O'Neill? That's gas - you met Roy Keane the same day. That kind of thing.

Lorelli!

Start pronouncing their name slightly but annoyingly different than the correct way.

Stare at their forehead, shoulder, side of their mouth etc whenever youre talking to them so they think they have something on them.

punisher5112

Keep making strange annoying sounds or wissle.

Tell them you think they look amazing and are a ride.

Put a banger in the letter box.

Superglue their car doors.

When they speak ask them to repeat everything you totally missed what they said.
In conversation just change halfway through and talk about absolute rubbish...

wakka12

put his number up on a porn site saying its a horny girl

Feckoffcup

Stapler in jelly
Second wireless mouse
Advertise something with their number

Vojera

Breathe through your mouth when they're around.

Eat your lunch near them and munch with your mouth open.

Slurp every sup of tea as loud as you can.

BBDBB

Grow a hedge that grows into their driveway so they have to cut it every year

or something

fineso.mom

Feckoffcup wrote: »

Not gonna say but it was a personal attack so revenge is justified in my eyes. Eye for an eye.

He took your EYE! !!! That's very serious OP, call the guards.

fryup

Radiant Cool Crazy Nightmare wrote: »

Every year or so I play a prank on my brother where I place an ad on done deal for face value tickets for the all ireland final and give his mobile number. It costs 3e I think but its well spent to see him go into meltdown when his phone doesnt stop going for days on end and he needs his phone so he cant switch it off. Ireland v Denmark is 2weeks away and thats also a sell out just saying

ah come on now, thats mean

Leilak

horses head in their bed

monkeysnapper

If the person has sky TV hang around outside house with another remote and every now and again turn channel to tits TV , works great when Mrs comes home .

Timing is essential tho

Lorelli!

monkeysnapper wrote: »

If the person has sky TV hang around outside house with another remote and every now and again turn channel to tits TV , works great when Mrs comes home .

Timing is essential tho

My mam gave me her old remote because I kept misplacing ours. My oh didn't know I had a second one and I kept messing with it when he was scrolling through the menu. Only got away it a few times before he realized

Hector Savage

jcd5971 wrote: »

Not true at the end there is one all powerful one eyed ****er left to rule.

Reminds me of a Dara O Bhrian sketch .... and until Mr Two f*cking eyes comes along!!

RayM

Continually mispronounce certain words in their presence (something simple, like adding an 's' onto the end of certain words, or placing emphasis on the wrong syllable). For some reason, people get wildly annoyed by that. For extra annoyance, double-down on it and insist that they're wrong when they inevitably correct you.

Malayalam

Sniff snots loudly up in the back of your nose whenever they are near.
Make spit-gathering hocking sounds in your mouth whenever they are near.
Clean your ear with the end of their pencil. Preferably the one they chew on while thinking.
Eat a tin of sardines with your fingers, sitting beside them. Slurp a lot. Lean over and use their keyboard in the middle of eating.
Open a can of corned beef beside them and then stick in a fork, yank the whole lot out smoothly and eat it like it's a big monster ice pop that just happens to smell like dog poo.
(All real life incidents, so perfectly feasible.)

ardinn

Switch the m and n keys on their keyboard - (they just pop out you wont break the KB)

http%3A%2F%2Fmashable.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F03%2Fhigh-schooler.jpg

http%3A%2F%2Fmashable.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F03%2Fballoon-office.jpg

http%3A%2F%2Fmashable.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F03%2Fairhorn-door.jpg

http%3A%2F%2Fmashable.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F03%2Fairhorn-chair.jpg

suicide_circus

Levi Ugly Ankle wrote: »

Grow up.

Slow hand clap for you sir

Robsweezie

go into boots and ask for male tampons. on being told there are none, you get outraged and remark '' i think its just disgusting that in 2017 there are no male tampons'' then demand to speak to a manager, really make as much of a scene as possible.

if manager comes out, give them more of the same, call him/her rude if they answer back, and tell them you'll be sending complaint to HR. Make your exit by grabbing a pack of tampons off the shelf and stuff two up your nose, make brief, intense eye contact with the staff/manager before storming out in a huff.

King George VI

I like to make very subtle spelling errors in all of my posts.

Avatar MIA

King George VI wrote: »

I like to make very subtle spelling errors in all of my posts.

You've failed, just like your attempt at ruling.

bazz26

Just introduce them to these guys:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OA-VLDQDDJ4

BrokenArrows

If you work with them in an office then the best thing you can do is adjust their office chair every day. People lose their **** when they come into the office and the chair is at a wrong angle or too low etc.

Lorelli!

Forgot about Cuffy. This could work op..although not very subtle :pac:

Tzardine

If you have access to their bedroom then I find the best way to annoy somebody is to crumble a digestive biscuit under their sheets.

Not enough to be obvious, but enough to annoy the bejaysus out of them.

Used to do it to my older brothers when I was younger and they were tormenting me. It was hilarious.

5rtytry56

When they have fallen asleep (so they will be asleep for the next number of hours)
get more 5 nicotine patches and put them on exposed areas of skin. Hide the unused patches, throw them away.

Buy a 3 or 4 packets of hi tar cigarettes like Silk Cut Red.

Put one in the bathroom, another in the kitchen, another in the living room.

Ask them casually when they get up out of bed tomorrow...."Do you need a morning cigarette?"

Hammer89

Invite him over for pork chops and eat the fat off his.

Hammer89

Show him Grace Dyas's blog.