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Sexual Assault ?

Heckler

I saw a vlog yesterday about a 17 year old at the time (now 18/19 or) and her experience.

She went to a party, got wasted drunk and ended up blowing a guy. This was caught on camera and passed around.

She reckons this was sexual assault and has a devastating effect a year later.

She blacked out and has no memory of about a 6 hour span.

Her only evidence of assault is her performing oral sex.

Is A drunk woman willing to perform sex acts on me a crime ? If so guilty. Vice versa !

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wakka12

...And Justice wrote: »

Not really, they don't talk that much anymore... do I report her for sexual assault, c'mon 3 pages ? Well...?

I dont get your point ..?
The majority of women will encounter mild sexual assault like what happened you multiple times on the average night out for instance. Many of my female friends will have their ass pinched or slapped a dozen times in a nightclub

anewme

...And Justice wrote: »

Not really, they don't talk that much anymore... do I report her for sexual assault, c'mon 3 pages ? Well...?

anewme wrote: »

The only person who can answer the question is yourself. No one else is privy to your life.

You do what you need to do and what you feel is right to do and what you feel comfortable with.

That applies to anyone, in any circumstances, in any situation.

...And Justice wrote: »

Mtly point is all you liberal lefties have been "sexually assaulted" under new rules, I must admit I sexually assault me wife a few times a week, she wants it. But under fcuking feminist terms.. I've raped her....

Sorry please explain from what I said have you deduced I am a liberal leftie.

I advised you the same as I would advise a man or woman and your response is aggressive.

There's no need for that.

368100

So the poster's sister in law should have the same happen.

anewme

...And Justice wrote: »

Not really, they don't talk that much anymore... do I report her for sexual assault, c'mon 3 pages ? Well...?

anewme wrote: »

The only person who can answer the question is yourself. No one else is privy to your life.

You do what you need to do and what you feel is right to do and what you feel comfortable with.

That applies to anyone, in any circumstances, in any situation.

...And Justice wrote: »

Mtly point is all you liberal lefties have been "sexually assaulted" under new rules, I must admit I sexually assault me wife a few times a week, she wants it. But under fcuking feminist terms.. I've raped her....

368100 wrote: »

So the poster's sister in law should have the same happen.

The poster is very aggressive and hostile.

A kind response of do what is best for yourself was met with " all you liberal lefties have been sexually assaulted " ( which I have never referred to) and "I sexually assault me wife"

This poster has a worrying obsession with "sexual assault"

He clearly has bigger issues than his sister in law.

wakka12

Happens lots in Dublin too, on crowded club nights. BUt yeh its a lot worse in canada and spain compared to here. But still, this happens girls in pretty much every country

B.A._Baracus

The words sexual assault and drunken mistake get mixed too easily these days.
As another said if a persons drink is spiked then absolutely yes it's sexual assault. But getting drunk and doing something you later regret when sober is just life.

arayess

lazybones32 wrote: »

Men don't have to be awake to have an erection or ejaculate. Stimulating the penis will increase bloodflow, which causes an erection. Morning boners are common and wet dreams happen when men don't have sex or masturbate.

In TGC, there is an article posted about a number of men who were raped by women.

There is nothing wrong with your comment but I was asking in terms of drunken women , as a direct follow on from the OP.
Also the idea of drunken consent/non-consent is only ever discuss in terms of women being taken advantaged of.

While you are correct....realistically a drunken man , drunk to the point of being unable to consent isn't getting an erection.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

...And Justice wrote: »

anewme wrote: »

The only person who can answer the question is yourself. No one else is privy to your life.

You do what you need to do and what you feel is right to do and what you feel comfortable with.

That applies to anyone, in any circumstances, in any situation.

Mtly point is all you liberal lefties have been "sexually assaulted" under new rules, I must admit I sexually assault me wife a few times a week, she wants it. But under fcuking feminist terms.. I've raped her....

Easy distinction - rape requires penetration, sexual assault does not. At least, legally.

If she's withdrawn consent and you've gone ahead anyway, it is by definition assault.

If it's a rape fantasy - which people do have - then consent to the scenario is (presumeably) agreed beforehand.

If it's surprise touching, I'd assume consent is also agreed on beforehand, but if she says no, not now or tells you to **** off, this lefty liberal is going to asse that you respect that, so no assault has is about to take place.

TheDavester

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

The words sexual assault and drunken mistake get mixed too easily these days.
As another said if a persons drink is spiked then absolutely yes it's sexual assault. But getting drunk and doing something you later regret when sober is just life.

Tell that to RMC, who tried to change her story from a regret encounter to maybe was I assaulted

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

The words sexual assault and drunken mistake get mixed too easily these days.
As another said if a persons drink is spiked then absolutely yes it's sexual assault. But getting drunk and doing something you later regret when sober is just life.

While I agree with you say, there's a difference between doing something you regret and having something done to you against your will that you regret.

lazybones32

arayess wrote: »

There is nothing wrong with your comment but I was asking in terms of drunken women , as a direct follow on from the OP.
Also the idea of drunken consent/non-consent is only ever discuss in terms of women being taken advantaged of.

While you are correct....realistically a drunken man , drunk to the point of being unable to consent isn't getting an erection.

Oh, you didn't point out the Q was directed to females only.

A Little Pony

sbsquarepants wrote: »

Deleted User wrote: »

I don't know, but whoever recorded it and passed it around is an absolute c*nt.

Though - if you get drunk and you willingly do something, then it is hard to tell if it is sexual assault. Are the people in the room as drunk as her? If so, are they taking advantage then?

Jaysus, surely it is common sense to say if you go out and get hammered and then blow some fella in front of a room full of people - you kind of are the architect of your own misery. It's not like this was some hidden camera thing.

You got drunk, you done something you now regret, we've all been there - it's just unfortunate now, with the technology available to every tom, dick and harry, that you can't scratch your arse without some fúcker uploading it to the internet.

Whatever this was - it certainly is not sexual assault. Whatever you do in public, you can't really complain about the public seeing.

If you don't want a video of you sucking cock appearing on the internet, don't suck cock in front a room full of strangers with cameras in their hands. Do we really need to tell people this shít!

Spot on. Nothing wrong with acting like a slut, just own up to it and be the best slut you can be. The only question needing answered on this issue is if it was any good, I certainly don't see any sexual assault here.

arayess

lazybones32 wrote: »

Oh, you didn't point out the Q was directed to females only.

cool no hassle , it was related to OP
I kinda wasn't thinking beyond that scenario

[Deleted User]

sbsquarepants wrote: »

Either do I - but is a house party a private place? You could argue it is I suppose, but I personally wouldn't class it as such.

If an event in someone's house can not be classified as a private place then I am not sure what else in the world meaningfully can. As far as listing things I would call "personal space" goes I would have one's own house at the top of the list. If that is not on the list then what on earth actually is?? What is more of a private place than one's own home?

sbsquarepants wrote: »

Would you be surprised if a dinner guest took a picture / video and uploaded it at some stage, especially after the drink had been flowing?

Not _surprised_ no - but at the same time I would _ideally_ think they should in a private setting of that sort ask first. Both before taking a picture and before uploading it.

But as with many things in life - there is a continuum of content - and we generally take short cuts around the "ideal" - and we often take some of that content as a given. So we do not ask. We simply assume. And we end up quite surprised when someone is upset about it.

A barely connected analogy but consider people getting together in a romantic relationship. "Ideally" they should sit down and list what they are ok with and not ok with in that relationship. But some things are so taken for granted that we rarely speak about them. How often do people say "ok so we are in a relationship now - does that mean I can shag other people or not?". I think most of us take it for granted.

Similarly I think ideally people should - in a private dinner house situation - ask before simply photoing all and sundry. But so many of us are ok with it it - the consensus has therefore become something of the default to assume "why not".

But while there are things on that continuum that are taken for granted by many people to be ok to photo and upload or distribute publicly without express permission - there is an opposite end to that continuum too where I feel it should be taken equally for absolute granted you _should_ ask.

And certainly acts of a sexual nature seem to qualify for that for me. Especially given in isolated contexts taking sexual media of another person is itself something you would generally seek consent for.

But why should the argument "Well you decided to have oral sex in front of all the people at a house party so it is on you if someone photos it and distributes" be any less offensive to us than the same argument being used at a wake in a house were I to go to one and start photographing the widow balling her eyes out - mascara messed all over the place - over the body and sending it to all my friends in a "look at yer wan" kinda way?

In both cases the person may have invited all the people over - and in both cases they have put themselves in a compromised position in front of those people - so surely by the reasoning I am seeing on the thread in both cases it is "on them" if someone whips out their phone without consent - and distributes the photos for a larf again without consent?