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Child Item

House is too big

Roger Mellie Man on the Telly

We bought a house. We've converted it from a 6 bed to a 3 bed, but the area and volume are unchanged.

It's too big.

I'm finding it hard to locate Mrs Mellie to give her her daily tasks and instructions.

What should we do?

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aaronjumper

Put in a swimming pool or a go karting track.

SimpleDimples

Allow the lady with the 6 kids living in a car to move in!

They'd fill the space no problem.

Barry Badrinath

Roger Mellie Man on the Telly wrote: »

We bought a house. We've converted it from a 6 bed to a 3 bed, but the area and volume are unchanged.

It's too big.

I'm finding it hard to locate Mrs Mellie to give her her daily tasks and instructions.

What should we do?

Tracker and intercom so you can still issue her tasks

punisher5112

SimpleDimples wrote: »

Allow the lady with the 6 kids living in a car to move in!

They'd fill the space no problem.

But they only have 3 bedrooms. They would needs to be extending to at least 12 to house her.

RayM

I was in a friend's house recently and couldn't help but notice the height of his sitting room ceiling. It must have been at least 16ft high.

Apparently they knocked two rooms into one...

Tangatagamadda Chaddabinga Bonga Bungo

Have you tried blasting the walls with piss?

That almost always helps.

Or option 2 is always there, lots of fire can fix things (just make sure all the piss has dried up first).

prinzeugen

Build a big model railway or knock a bit off the back of the house?

prinzeugen

Or..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VM4KBOv-O-g

LirW

Get yourself a Filipino to keep it clean and take the deliveries while you're having lunch out.

Charles Babbage

Snooker table.
Bowling alley
Holodeck.

NickNickleby

RayM wrote: »

I was in a friend's house recently and couldn't help but notice the height of his sitting room ceiling. It must have been at least 16ft high.

Apparently they knocked two rooms into one...

An oldie but goldie , from Roy Walker if I remember correctly.

As for Mr Mellie's problem, why not move the kitchen into the corner of the master bedroom. Then you'd always know her whereabouts.

(thank God Mrs Nickleby doesn't read these).

jamesbere

Open a brothel, plenty of room for it.

Yourself isit

Roger Mellie Man on the Telly wrote: »

We bought a house. We've converted it from a 6 bed to a 3 bed, but the area and volume are unchanged.

It's too big.

I'm finding it hard to locate Mrs Mellie to give her her daily tasks and instructions.

What should we do?

Thinly veiled I have a big house which I converted from 6 to 3 rooms and is now too big thread.

Persephone kindness

Yourself isit wrote: »

Thinly veiled I have a big house which I converted from 6 to 3 rooms and is now too big thread.

Congrats on house OP. I suggest you shag your wife.

If size is still an issue in morning I would be surprised...so in that case either downsize..to a lovely smaller house .....or add kids.

And dogs

Babies take up a LOT of space.

Outlaw Pete

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4RNv4qbRajw

DivingDuck

Roger Mellie Man on the Telly wrote: »

What should we do?

Sell it to me at a discount.

Totofan99

Burn half of it down

munster87

punisher5112 wrote: »

But they only have 3 bedrooms. They would needs to be extending to at least 12 to house her.

Or just move the car into the house.

dmc17

SimpleDimples wrote: »

Allow the lady with the 6 kids living in a car to move in!

They'd fill the space no problem.

She might not like the area the house is located though

[Deleted User]

Go retro and get a CB radio

RobbingBandit

S&M temple of doom ride, you'll get a few dyslexic marks and spencers shoppers too they can serve as your gimps.