My gay hair...

DeVore · 31-01-2003 10:37am #1

I thought this was funny so I wrote my weekly article-thing about it. I thought I'd post it here for a laugh. (http://devore.boards.ie).

I was floored by it actually because its not the first time its been mentioned to me (to be fair the person who said it recently was partly joking!).

Its amazing what happens when you steadfastly refuse to comment on something personal one way or the other...

DeV.

DeVore · 31-01-2003 10:41am

Oh and my point was that I dont think you can identify someones sexuality from physical attributes but it seems a lot of people DO think that!

Opinions?

DeV.

Bard · 31-01-2003 10:53am

Unrelated to the subject matter I know, but the page says that you posted that to the blog on Feb 2nd...?

hussey · 31-01-2003 11:16am

Originally posted by DeVore
Oh and my point was that I dont think you can identify someones sexuality from physical attributes but it seems a lot of people DO think that!

Opinions?

DeV.

I'd personally judge people on how they talk, walk/dance and dress sense .. well so do most people I assume

I died my got blonde highlights 2 years ago and they really suited my hair, I had girls coming up to me saying .. your hair is really nice etc.

But what I didn't realise is loads of people thought I was gay!
I remember Dancing with a girl I liked (call her racheal) and her friend was there(call her monica), a girl I once meet came up to me to say hi (phoebe), and phoebe said to rach when she was going something like 'Your lucky he is really nice!' rach just smiled.
Monica later asked me a few harmless questions and her last question is 'I have to know, are you gay or what?? I mean you can dance, dress well, look at your hair? and you've been flirting with rach for ages now?' I was shocked and told her no,
we had a good laugh about it afters.

I asked rach did she think i was gay, she thought I was like David beckham, a bit femine. I was a gay straight man she said, as I often talk to her about soaps and fashion etc.

I later snogged her!
But i never dyed my hair again .. mainly cause I was a poor student, I was going to do it, but one of the guys in work dyed his hair so I can't now

DeVore · 31-01-2003 11:24am

yeah I was up at 6:30 am this morning for no reason (stupid brain!) so I decided to finish off the article I had started during the week and wanted to pre-publish it (as Spin's CMS would have allowed me too... plug plug)... but it doesnt work like that. Boooo!

Anyway, I left it there as I have this thing about "blogs" which I dont like. Personally I *dont* find the drip-drip daily diary of uninteresting trivia particularly appealing... the stream of inane sh|t gets to me eventually.... Thats not to say that a "blog" cant revolve around less-then-world-shattering events, but I think time and effort and some sort of skill should be involved. You can craft a throw-away-blog.

I actually write for myself and have been enjoying this so far as I dont get to write much of this sort of stuff on Boards and it gives me a bit more freedom and lets me express some humour too (at least *I* think its funneh!

)

Anyway, I wanted to sort of set up a predictable publishing schedule whereby on Monday morning its updated...
I wanted to publish it on Sunday but I finished it this morning...

So there you go!

DeV.

Mercury_Tilt · 31-01-2003 11:47am

This post has been deleted.

Victor · 31-01-2003 1:06pm

Yes, you get hints from body language, mannerisms, hair / clothes / style whatever, but none of these create a verdict of "innocent" or "guilty", merely suspicions, which need not necessarily be investigated.

Originally posted by hussey
Monica later asked me a few harmless questions and her last question is 'I have to know, are you gay or what?? I mean you can dance, dress well, look at your hair? and you've been flirting with rach for ages now?' I was shocked and told her no,
we had a good laugh about it afters.

I later snogged her!

And all along I thought Hussey was a woman! And but for her saying you were a "gay straight man", I wouldn't have known any better from this post.

swiss · 31-01-2003 1:12pm

Yes DeV, your hair is clearly clearly gay.... but I thought it was your overtly camp mannerisms that caused more suspicion than anything else

Anyway, I wouldn't worry about it - lot's of people get false readings on their Gaydar. I'm very concious about how I act, and the mannerisms I exhibit, and whether they could be construed as gay, camp or even at the other end - butch, excessively masculine etc.

Some people are very obviously gay, in a big Gay Al kind of way. Others are rather more subtle, and it takes either a very finely tuned gaydar, or an outright admission to find out whether they are gay or not, and I *think* I fit into this category.

But yes, in relation to the point about tight tops, yes that is an indicator that a guy *may* be gay (don't know about women, i'm not that interested in finding that out for some reason :-D). Also some gay men have a tendency to wear very white clothes (for whatever reason

).

So frankly I don't look closely at a persons hair when trying to judge their sexuality. Most gay men have short hair, just like the general population, so to make a stereotype about it seems to be a logical incongruity.

Anyway, short of stomping up to a person asking to know what their sexuality is, physical attributes is all we have to go on

. That's why people judge based on these limited benchmarks.

Talliesin · 31-01-2003 1:28pm

C'mon, floppy hair hasn't been a gay subculture thing since Oscar Wilde got sent to Reading Gaol.

Victor · 31-01-2003 1:34pm

Originally posted by swiss
So frankly I don't look closely at a persons hair when trying to judge their sexuality. Most gay men have short hair, just like the general population, so to make a stereotype about it seems to be a logical incongruity.

I haven't gone counting or measuring, but one of my indicators for "gayness" (:rolleyes:) would be very tight (but stylish!) hair or a shaved head (and other bits sometimes

).

DeVore · 31-01-2003 2:01pm

Yes DeV, your hair is clearly clearly gay.... but I thought it was your overtly camp mannerisms that caused more suspicion than anything else

What? LoL... um... I've never thought that anything I've ever done could be construed as "camp" let alone overtly camp!

What camp mannerisms are these?!

God, between you and Yellum (in the comments) I'm getting all self-conscious...

I think I'll take to my bed, with vapours... (minces away tapping chest swiftly with his hand)...

DeV.

DeVore · 31-01-2003 2:05pm

btw... I thought the humour of it was coming from the (wilfully misconstrued) idea that *part* of my body could have its own independant sexuality... "gay hair" "straight elbows" etc

That lead to a mental imagination of my hair (alone, bodyless) going out clubbing, cruising for other floppy haircuts, going on Gay Pride marches... unbeknowst to me.

Perhaps I should take less class C.

DeV.

hussey · 31-01-2003 2:09pm

Originally posted by Victor
Yes, you get hints from body language, mannerisms, hair / clothes / style whatever, but none of these create a verdict of "innocent" or "guilty", merely suspicions, which need not necessarily be investigated.

And all along I thought Hussey was a woman! And but for her saying you were a "gay straight man", I wouldn't have known any better from this post.

Hussey is my 2nd name!!
it was though growing up with that name .. but not as though as it would have been for my sister

Mercury_Tilt · 31-01-2003 2:32pm

This post has been deleted.

Talliesin · 31-01-2003 2:56pm

In case anyone who hasn't met DeVore is wondering, his hair looks like this:

Dr_Teeth · 31-01-2003 3:05pm

Maybe you're just a male lesbian Dev.

Teeth.

BuffyBot · 31-01-2003 4:15pm

Straight elbows? Ouch!

..and what are they doing on this board if they are so straight, huh?

yellum · 31-01-2003 4:24pm

I'm having far too much fun on DeVores blog to reply here really.

I think you should ask Dr Kraw about the gay hair, he'd know what best to do.

meglome · 31-01-2003 4:31pm

Tom I've always thought of your hair as having a life of it's own. Sort of like in the Simpsons when Snakes hair is possessed albeit a gay version.

Actually I just agreed that you have big poofy hair, well there you go.

DeVore · 31-01-2003 4:58pm

My hair totally has a life of its own... which is kinda why the thought struck me about its secret life being a gay one when the comment was made. I gave up years ago trying to control it.

Perhaps I need WELLA or something *mutter* *mutter*...

DeV.

BuffyBot · 31-01-2003 7:59pm

Originally posted by DeVore
Perhaps I need WELLA or something *mutter* *mutter*...

DeV.

<uploads cement>

...that should keep it in it's place...damned militant gay hairs!

DeVore · 03-02-2003 2:54pm

Will my hair become militant?!?

Will it out other hair? Carry banners that read "Just cos I'm straight, dont presume I'm straight?"
Will it chant slogans like "Hey! I'm Gay! I look like so much hay!"

I'm deeply concerned that my hair will recruit other parts of me to its campaign. Apparently my hands are coming OUT in sympathy.
(http://www.boards.ie/blog/devore/archives/000020.html#000020)

DeV.

Talliesin · 03-02-2003 5:30pm

Will my hair become militant?!?

When I did that photo of your hair my original plan was to somehow place it in the middle of the Battle of Christopher Street, but alas no appropriate photos could be found.

yellum · 03-02-2003 6:18pm

You and your hair have had their 15 minutes of fame in the GLB Issues forum. Move along now, nothing funny to see here any more.

DeVore · 03-02-2003 8:09pm

Ok, I'll make honest comment...

Its regularly amused me how people jump to conclusions about this topic. It attracts comment and rumour more then any other.

I've never commented on my sexuality (and I can make this short for you, I wont here either). I dont because it GREATLY amuses me to lead people on "merry chases" and the best way to start them is to let them jump to a conclusion.

The idea that hair, eyebrows, hands, whatever... can identify a persons sexuality seems so funny to me that I thought my column would be funny if I exagerated it and gave my hair some lease of life. (obviously people who WANT to express their sexuality can do it through hair, hands, whatever... thats not the same thing).

What kills me is that any (and I mean ANY) contact/discussion/observation with/about Gay people or homosexuality immediately puts "doubts" in other peoples minds.

You cant comment on it without the "why do you care, are you one of them?" attitude. If you dont strongly deny it then obviously you are in the closet. If you discuss it twice, its paramount to a public declaration...

No smoke without fire... eh! EH? Know what I mean?

DeV.

BuffyBot · 03-02-2003 8:13pm

Originally posted by DeVore
Will my hair become militant?!?

Yes. It'll be just a phase though, so need to worry

Some people call them bad hair days

Now, where is that "I'm Coming Out" Diana Ross mp3..I think you might be needing it

DeVore · 03-02-2003 8:17pm

That would imply the existance of days when my hair was good

DeV.

Shinji · 03-02-2003 9:13pm

No smoke without fire... eh! EH? Know what I mean?

Yes that's all very well Tom, but at the end of the day, you DO have sex with burly men so I'm not sure what you're complaining about...

BuffyBot · 03-02-2003 10:45pm

Originally posted by DeVore
That would imply the existance of days when my hair was good

DeV.

Well, I'm sure there was at least 1 day. Accidents happen to the best of us

swiss · 04-02-2003 3:48pm

http://www.ironworks.com/comedy/python/spam.wav

My gay hair...

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