I will try to keep emotion out of my post but feel free to express any heart ache you may be feeling on this issue as it is a very contentious one.
Basically, we seperated and were getting on fine. We agreed shared access and guardianship. The Judge didn't do anything formal about the access he said as we were amenable to see how it goes, any difficulties to return to court.
There was some unpleasantness afterward but we got sorted out. The baby was spending mon and wed afternoons with his dad, having great fun. If we were in town, I would send a text and get invited over with the baby for coffee and a chat. So most weeks, he would see him probably 5 days out of 7. And I like that.
Then the day arrived 10 weeks ago when I picked up the baby and was told he (Dad) would be away for a couple of weeks from the next day. I thought it was funny he hadn't mentioned it, inconvenient too as I had to notify the childminder and, well, inconsiderate. Fumed a bit, but no harm done really. Except the two weeks came and went and there was no word. A month went by, still nothing. Christmas came and went, still no word.
Until two weeks ago when he told me he was moving house, did I want the baby's stuff? And then he sent me a long email saying that as he can never be a 'proper' Dad, he shouldn't see the baby at all.
At this point, I'm thinking 'fair enough, you are clearly unstable perhaps you staying away would not be a bad idea' - given that he had gone so long without contact when I had never ever obstructed him from seeing that lovely little boy. If he had mentioned his insecurities BEFORE going missing I would have tried to talk him down. But he didn't and now here we are.
Should I ask to be granted sole custody legally or what do people feel is the correct way to handle this?