In trouble with the guards

johnoshea1 · 14-11-2011 6:56pm #1

Hi all,

I had bouts of diarhea on Saturday. I thought everything ok so went out on the lash with some friends and had a few beers. Bout 2 hours into the nite at 11 the cramps came back. I tried to get to the bog in the pub but it was busy so ran outside the pub down a side street and exploded.

Unfortunately, a garda foot patrol was walking past. They took my name and address and said I will be goin to court because of public order and drunk. What shud I do?

AnonoBoy · 14-11-2011 6:57pm

Hi Flutterin - didn't take you long to come back.

14-11-2011 6:58pm

You should have asked one of them for their hat.

Dotrel · 14-11-2011 6:59pm

johnoshea1 wrote: »

Hi all,

I had bouts of diarhea on Saturday. I thought everything ok so went out on the lash with some friends and had a few beers. Bout 2 hours into the nite at 11 the cramps came back. I tried to get to the bog in the pub but it was busy so ran outside the pub down a side street and exploded.

Unfortunately, a garda foot patrol was walking past. They took my name and address and said I will be goin to court because of public order and drunk. What shud I do?

Make a big stink.

The King of Moo · 14-11-2011 6:59pm

Will you be ok to play in the match tomorrow?

John Doe1 · 14-11-2011 7:03pm

Thats rotten:eek:

BBDBB · 14-11-2011 7:04pm

wash your hands ya filthy devil

castletownman · 14-11-2011 7:04pm

Stop talking scutter!

pbowenroe · 14-11-2011 7:04pm

get Trap to put in a word for you

Nailz · 14-11-2011 7:05pm

This should be good...

Wertz · 14-11-2011 7:05pm

No law about public defecation AFAIK... they have you on the drunk/public order thing though... merely a catchall for the stuff they can't do you for... go to court and plead your case, pay your fine. Tough sh*t.

stovelid · 14-11-2011 7:06pm

Don't worry about it.

If you do get a summons In the next six months, get a brief and go to court and explain.

Do not turn up at the court without a brief!

If all you did is what you described, and you haven't been if trouble before, you will have to put a few hundred in the poor box but are very unlikely to get a conviction.

Hate to be you describing your bowel movement to a narky judge, but.

Fromthetrees · 14-11-2011 7:25pm

When you gotta go;)

pragmatic1 · 14-11-2011 7:41pm

We're here for you champ. Diarrhea is a terrible affliction.

hondasam · 14-11-2011 7:49pm

Court fine will completely clean you out

ejmaztec · 14-11-2011 7:51pm

In before the re-reg permaban.

kincsem · 14-11-2011 7:53pm

johnoshea1 wrote: »

Unfortunately, a garda foot patrol was walking past.

I believed your post until I read that.

Hank_Jones · 14-11-2011 7:56pm

Say that you were pregnant, the judge will love that one.

Kidchameleon · 14-11-2011 7:59pm

You can get done for p*ssing on the street but you cant get done for sh*ting. It has something to do the medical side of things, dangerous to hold a poo in / not dangerous to hold wee in. Oh and the guards are obliged to hand over their hat for such an occasion, not a word of a lie.

CardBordWindow · 14-11-2011 7:59pm

Re-enact the whole thing in court!

Mint Sauce · 14-11-2011 8:12pm

Not as funny as the 'Wife feeds hubbys dinner to the dog and makes him sleep on the couch' thread last night.

Sunnyisland · 14-11-2011 8:14pm

Crap thread.

UglyBolloxFace · 14-11-2011 8:27pm

Kidchameleon wrote: »

You can get done for p*ssing on the street but you cant get done for sh*ting....Oh and the guards are obliged to hand over their hat for such an occasion, not a word of a lie.

No way, you have to be ripping the piss shít?

Can you point me in the direction of links and evidence for this please? Thank you.

Trevor451 · 14-11-2011 8:29pm

Sh*t thread, OP

Mr.Crinklewood · 14-11-2011 8:34pm

If you get jailed, "Big Geoff" will poke the poo right back were it came from.

AudreyHepburn · 14-11-2011 8:36pm

johnoshea1 wrote: »

Hi all,

I had bouts of diarhea on Saturday. I thought everything ok so went out on the lash with some friends and had a few beers. Bout 2 hours into the nite at 11 the cramps came back. I tried to get to the bog in the pub but it was busy so ran outside the pub down a side street and exploded.

Unfortunately, a garda foot patrol was walking past. They took my name and address and said I will be goin to court because of public order and drunk. What shud I do?

I do feel sorry for you but all honesty you defecated in public, you didn't honestly expect them to turn a blind eye did you? Especially if you were drunk at the time.

Was there nowhere nearby you could have gone?

Next time have some sense and don't go on the lash when you,re in that kind of state.

RMD · 14-11-2011 8:39pm

Kidchameleon wrote: »

You can get done for p*ssing on the street but you cant get done for sh*ting. It has something to do the medical side of things, dangerous to hold a poo in / not dangerous to hold wee in. Oh and the guards are obliged to hand over their hat for such an occasion, not a word of a lie.

There's no way on earth that's true. Please find me the legislation that states that.

Son Of A Vidic · 14-11-2011 8:42pm

Shít happens.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 14-11-2011 8:42pm

At least you managed to make it outside before the explosion. If it happened inside the pub you could be facing civil suits for emotional and post-traumatic stress.

source · 14-11-2011 8:46pm

Kidchameleon wrote: »

You can get done for p*ssing on the street but you cant get done for sh*ting. It has something to do the medical side of things, dangerous to hold a poo in / not dangerous to hold wee in. Oh and the guards are obliged to hand over their hat for such an occasion, not a word of a lie.

All urban legend.

KeithM89_old · 14-11-2011 8:50pm

ejmaztec wrote: »

In before the re-reg permaban.

Yup.

In trouble with the guards

Comments