my morning Terminator shower routine

magick · 02-11-2007 1:41pm #1

I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it "the terminator". First I crouch down in the shower in the classic "naked terminator traveling through time" pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.

WindSock · 02-11-2007 1:45pm

Do you have a warm liquid goo phase too?

Hellm0 · 02-11-2007 1:45pm

Pic or it never happened.

zuutroy · 02-11-2007 1:45pm

magick wrote: »

With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one )

So basically you're telling us you think about Robert Patrick while you're naked in the shower as opposed to a sweet lay-day?

Cheeky_gal · 02-11-2007 1:46pm

magick wrote: »

I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it "the terminator". First I crouch down in the shower in the classic "naked terminator traveling through time" pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.

You're really weird...

ScumLord · 02-11-2007 1:52pm

I didn't know they had internet access in the ceile house these days.

Dave! · 02-11-2007 1:53pm

Sweet, so I'm not the only one who does that!

biko · 02-11-2007 1:53pm

Hey, at least it's not another poo thread.

star-pants · 02-11-2007 1:57pm

magick wrote: »

The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg.

I hate when that happens

_blank_ · 02-11-2007 2:02pm

While I don't partake of this shower activity, I do sometimes go around in "cyborg mode". You know when you see the outlook from the eyes of the Terminator, with all the info coming up on the screen.

Human Female.
Hair : Blonde
Height : 5' 6"
Weight : Skinny

Dog
Coat : Brown
Teeth : Sharp
Bark : Loud

Cat
Coat : Orange
Claws : Sharp
Eats : Mice

dum-di-dum

Rhyme · 02-11-2007 2:04pm

I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it "the Psycho" a lá the famous movie. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotional woma-

...wait.

whiskeyman · 02-11-2007 2:05pm

I wonder if you'd try that in the showers after a game of footie with the lads...

emeraldstar · 02-11-2007 2:51pm

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

weird.

Sizzler · 02-11-2007 2:55pm

In before lock due to sheer weirdness :eek:

connundrum · 02-11-2007 2:55pm

magick wrote: »

The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.

You need to invest in a shower glass unit thingy. Example.

Learn from my mistakes padwan.

Earthhorse · 02-11-2007 2:57pm

What day is it? The date!

CountingCrows · 02-11-2007 3:11pm

Earthhorse wrote: »

What day is it? The date!

JUDGMENT DAY!

Earthhorse · 02-11-2007 3:19pm

CountingCrows wrote: »

JUDGMENT DAY!

WHAT YEAR?

CountingCrows · 02-11-2007 3:32pm

Post-apocalyptic year 2029 - obviously!:D

beans · 02-11-2007 3:33pm

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

BrianTheMessiah · 02-11-2007 3:35pm

CountingCrows wrote: »

JUDGMENT DAY!

JUDGEMENT DAY

We're not in doodle land, y'know!

CountingCrows · 02-11-2007 3:36pm

beans wrote: »

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

Whats it like getting up at 4am?

Earthhorse · 02-11-2007 3:37pm

CountingCrows wrote: »

Post-apocalyptic year 2029 - obviously!

Man, I'm really late for work.

Stark · 02-11-2007 3:39pm

For it to be a Terminator shower, you'd need to walk out naked onto the street and steal someone's clothes on the way to work.

Try it, saves loads of time in the morning.

5starpool · 02-11-2007 3:40pm

beans wrote: »

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

Despite the fact that this has to be a psstake, the fact that you know all these terms as a man disturbs me. At least I hope this is a joke.

hardCopy · 02-11-2007 3:40pm

beans wrote: »

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

In a weird coincidence, I am getting my first set of business cards today.

Stark · 02-11-2007 3:41pm

5starpool wrote: »

Despite the fact that this has to be a psstake, the fact that you know all these terms as a man disturbs me. At least I hope this is a joke.

Men have been known to share bathrooms with women.

deadprez · 02-11-2007 3:41pm

magick wrote: »

I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it "the terminator". First I crouch down in the shower in the classic "naked terminator traveling through time" pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.

hahaha your a genius dude!

_blank_ · 02-11-2007 3:42pm

5starpool wrote: »

Despite the fact that this has to be a psstake, the fact that you know all these terms as a man disturbs me. At least I hope this is a joke.

Whoosh.

alienhead · 02-11-2007 3:42pm

i have to drop back some video tapes!

deadprez · 02-11-2007 3:43pm

5starpool wrote: »

Despite the fact that this has to be a psstake, the fact that you know all these terms as a man disturbs me. At least I hope this is a joke.

haha it's from American Psycho dude! No worries! He can't even do a sit up!

ClarenceOveur · 02-11-2007 3:45pm

DesF wrote: »

Whoosh.

He has mistaken me for this d!ckhead Marcus Halberstram. It seems logical because Marcus also works at P&P and in fact does the same exact thing you do and he also has a penchant for Valentino suits and Oliver Peoples glasses. Marcus and you even go to the same barber, although you have a slightly better haircut.

Aard · 02-11-2007 3:46pm

BrianTheMessiah wrote: »

JUDGEMENT DAY

You're doing it wrong.

BrianTheMessiah · 02-11-2007 4:00pm

How so?

Terry · 02-11-2007 4:10pm

Aard wrote: »

You're doing it wrong.

Heh.
It went right over his head.

knird evol · 02-11-2007 4:24pm

beans wrote: »

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

Did you catch patty winters this morning, about weirdos who think they are the Terminator

ScumLord · 02-11-2007 4:41pm

deadprez wrote: »

haha it's from American Psycho dude! No worries! He can't even do a sit up!

I was going to say, is that before or after you go on a murderous rampage.

MOH · 02-11-2007 4:49pm

Just as long as you don't try popping out your eyeball in the bathroom mirror ..

seaner · 02-11-2007 4:50pm

lol

MagicMarker · 02-11-2007 4:55pm

alienhead wrote: »

i have to drop back some video tapes!

Nice..

Kess73 · 02-11-2007 5:05pm

beans wrote: »

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

Love that book and Film. Bateman rules.

ScumLord · 02-11-2007 5:10pm

Great book, decent film. I couldn't read he's daily routines or reviews, just had to skip to the end of the chapter. Some of them where over 10 pages long!!

tech77 · 02-11-2007 5:37pm

Kess73 wrote: »

Bateman rules.

I'm guessing you mean that in an ironic sense.

Also funniest AH thread in a long while.

beans · 02-11-2007 6:25pm

Time to crack out the old furry orange, over-head earphones. It's hip to be square and all that

Krieg · 02-11-2007 6:45pm

DesF wrote: »

While I don't partake of this shower activity, I do sometimes go around in "cyborg mode". You know when you see the outlook from the eyes of the Terminator, with all the info coming up on the screen.

Human Female.
Hair : Blonde
Height : 5' 6"
Weight : Skinny

Dog
Coat : Brown
Teeth : Sharp
Bark : Loud

Cat
Coat : Orange
Claws : Sharp
Eats : Mice

dum-di-dum

I managed to stop doing that

However, Jean luc picard and the enterprise are still flying around my empty brain (space) and controlling me... actually Im going to save this for the PI forum some day.

beans wrote: »

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

I am genuinely interested to know if you played that from memory
Great movie

Antamojo · 02-11-2007 6:59pm

beans wrote: »

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

lol

At night I like to throw chainsaws down a few flights of stairs at prostitutes too

emeraldstar · 02-11-2007 7:01pm

beans wrote: »

In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

Well you know you really shouldn't put on the ice pack before using the deep pore cleansing lotion, as it would be more effective if your pores were open rather than closed before doing this. Perhaps a good steaming before cleansing would be more beneficial.

yawnstretch · 02-11-2007 7:06pm

magick wrote: »

I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it "the terminator". First I crouch down in the shower in the classic "naked terminator traveling through time" pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.

bwahaahahaAaaaaaaAAA!

-EXCELLENT

Heisenberg. · 02-11-2007 7:17pm

This post has been deleted.

Jesus Wept · 02-11-2007 7:40pm

Kess73 wrote: »

Love that book and Film. Bateman rules.

woah

Bateman is only one letter off Batman, cosmic.

Binomate · 02-11-2007 7:48pm

I pee in the shower.

my morning Terminator shower routine

Comments