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A little help from the ladies with the frillies

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  • 01-10-2007 10:32pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hey Folks, not sure if this is the correct forum for this, but AH will probably take the piss. The upshot is, I'm looking for a surprise present for my lady friend, we've been seeing each other for a few months.
    I've decided to buy her some nice lingery, and here's were the problems start. I'm not going to go into a shop, as I'll end up panic buying. I'm not up to that; I'm too shy, so I'm going to buy on-line.
    Now I'm not a total amature, so I stole a glance at her bra size, and I have that. I don't however have her "brief" size, or her "stocking", or her "corset" sizes and I've NO idea what these are. I've picked out a little something on agent provocateur, it's nice, but it's expensive, and I don't want to spend a lot on something that doesn't fit.
    She's around a size 10? (I think) And about 5ft 6/8? But I'm not sure. She's thin.

    So...
    how do i find these sizes out with out asking her?
    can you recommend any other sites of nice lingery i should also look at?

    Also, one corset I saw doesn't come in her cup size, one a size smaller - would it be ok to buy for her (I have a pleasant image of super clevage here) or would it be too uncomfortable??

    Thanks for you help.


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    #2
    star-pants
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,429 ✭✭✭✭star-pants


    As regards 'briefs' ... you might want to see if you can get her size because if shes a 10 and you get 8 they might be bet on.. and if you get 10 shes an 8 they might be all big.

    Stockings usually go with your height. I'm only 5'3 so i get small cuz i've only wee legs. If she's tall you'd need probably a medium.

    Corsets -- interesting, I'd be an 8 BUT I dont have tiny boobs so an size 8 corset won't close around me. so I'd to go for a size 10. As it might be uncomfortable. Smaller cup sizes dont alway equal supercleavage.. can be squashed 4 boobs cleavage..

    not sure if any of this is helpful. Ann summers have stuff online maybe?
    and honestly -- if you went into a store---they'd be really helpful -- they're used to guys coming in and won't make you feel embarrassed. I helped a guy pick out a whole outfit & underwear for his wife one christmas. He was so cute he'd all her measurements on a bit of paper.


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    #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    star-pants wrote:
    As regards 'briefs' ... you might want to see if you can get her size because if shes a 10 and you get 8 they might be bet on.. and if you get 10 shes an 8 they might be all big.
    I take it I'll infd this on the lable of her pants?
    Stockings usually go with your height. I'm only 5'3 so i get small cuz i've only wee legs. If she's tall you'd need probably a medium.
    She's about 5 foot 6 - small as well?
    Corsets -- interesting, I'd be an 8 BUT I dont have tiny boobs so an size 8 corset won't close around me. so I'd to go for a size 10. As it might be uncomfortable. Smaller cup sizes dont alway equal supercleavage.. can be squashed 4 boobs cleavage..
    Ok, but
    not sure if any of this is helpful. Ann summers have stuff online maybe?
    No, thanks a million - I really need all the help I can get. I'll try Ann Summers - but is that a little tacky? I don't want to get this wrong!
    and honestly -- if you went into a store---they'd be really helpful -- they're used to guys coming in and won't make you feel embarrassed.
    Yea I know - but I also know, I'll get really reall embarrassed, I'll start sweating, I won't be able to pick something I like cause I'll be rushing to get out of there, and I'll end up buying the very first thing that recommended... I know myself well, and it's not going to wash. I tried once with a girlfriend and just got really embarrassed.


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    #4
    dudara
    Registered Users Posts: 33,519 ✭✭✭✭dudara


    ShyMan wrote:
    I take it I'll infd this on the lable of her pants?
    Most likely place.
    ShyMan wrote:
    She's about 5 foot 6 - small as well?
    That's tall-ish for a lady so I'd say medium
    ShyMan wrote:
    I'll try Ann Summers - but is that a little tacky? I don't want to get this wrong!
    Start looking in Ann Summers in order to get ideas, but it is a little tacky. Agent Provacateur is classy stuff as is Myla.
    ShyMan wrote:
    Yea I know - but I also know, I'll get really reall embarrassed, I'll start sweating, I won't be able to pick something I like cause I'll be rushing to get out of there, and I'll end up buying the very first thing that recommended... I know myself well, and it's not going to wash. I tried once with a girlfriend and just got really embarrassed.
    Just imagine how much she'll appreciate the gift.


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    #5
    Talliesin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,314 ✭✭✭Talliesin


    It's not the end of the world to have to bring it back to get it changed for a different size, so don't worry too much.

    The staff in good Lingerie shops will be very helpful (though have a price limit in your head, some of the better salespeople in Agent Provocateur and Anne Summers can be a bit too helpful and you could end up leaving with a lot more than you planned on).

    If she normally wears a corset then you'll have to find what size she's wearing because you won't know how much she's going down from the size of her other clothes. If she doesn't then go four inches down from her waist size (jeans are handy, they have the waist size written on them nice and clear and it doesn't wear off the leather tab with washing). Really though, corset's are best avoided unless she's at least said she wants one. Just go for a basque or something instead.


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    #6
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Talliesin wrote:
    It's not the end of the world to have to bring it back to get it changed for a different size, so don't worry too much.
    Well as I said I'll be buying online, so it'd be messy.
    If she normally wears a corset then you'll have to find what size she's wearing because you won't know how much she's going down from the size of her other clothes. If she doesn't then go four inches down from her waist size (jeans are handy, they have the waist size written on them nice and clear and it doesn't wear off the leather tab with washing). Really though, corset's are best avoided unless she's at least said she wants one. Just go for a basque or something instead.
    Sorry a basque was what I had in mind tbh. - I take it I'd use the above for sizing?


    I just had a look at the ann summers web site, it's not really what I'm after (and besides it's not very clear what the clothes look like) - the AP site is way better. But I'll check Myla now - cheers. Can you recommend any other nice lingery lines? (along the AP lines) cheers


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    #7
    tattoo
    Registered Users Posts: 139 ✭✭tattoo


    Be very careful buying lingerie for her indoors. I went through this a while ago. I went to agent provocateur, had all her sizes, chatted with the lovely assistant, picked out something similar to what my gf had looked at before and left thinking i was the dogs bxxxxxks.

    Gave them to the love of my life and she couldn't do enough for me:cool: .

    However i have never actually seen them outside the box but it is a lovely box. Never again. 150 euro wasted


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    #8
    tattoo
    Registered Users Posts: 139 ✭✭tattoo


    star-pants wrote:
    cuz i've only wee legs.

    wee and legs together is a no no:D


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    #9
    star-pants
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,429 ✭✭✭✭star-pants


    tattoo wrote:
    star-pants wrote:
    cuz i've only wee legs.

    wee and legs together is a no no:D

    you know I meant little legs! :D

    Yeh sorry about that OP -- I couldn't think of a shop. Although I must say I got some nice stuff in another place and got a good reception ;)
    HAHA went to see if I could recall the name of a good one I'd seen online.. work access doesn't like the word 'lingerie' ... guess that's fair enough!

    and yes if she's 5'6 I'd go medium on the stockings too. (her underwear size will be on the tag on her underwear btw)

    Good luck & that's a very nice present!


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    #10
    Beruthiel
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,362 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    tattoo wrote:
    wee and legs together is a no no:D

    Read this forums charter before you get yourself banned from here.


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    #11
    fits
    Registered Users Posts: 13,270 ✭✭✭✭fits


    I'd advise against Ann Summers... just dont like their stuff.
    www.figleaves.com is a huge website with a large selection of stuff.


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    #12
    The Sweeper
    Registered Users Posts: 10,658 ✭✭✭✭The Sweeper


    ShyMan wrote:
    The upshot is, I'm looking for a surprise present for my lady friend, we've been seeing each other for a few months.
    I've decided to buy her some nice lingery, and here's were the problems start.

    Majd's five point plan on buying lingerie for your missus.

    One: What does your missus wear at the moment?

    If your missus wears plain cotton bras with the sort of multicoloured pants you buy in bulk-packs from Dunnes for a tenner, she might not be comfortable with your choice in 'sexy' underwear. A black balconette plunge bra with purple trim and a matching barely-there black g-string with a purple fluff pouffe on the crotch may not be her cup of tea. There are also a number of bra camps: Team Underwire, Team No Underwire, Team Padding, Team No Padding, Team Seamless, Team Lace Trim, Team That's Itchy and Team I'm Wearing Something That Would Look Appropriate On A Pre-Teen. Which team is your missus on?

    Two: The Clown Factor

    Never underestimate the potential for your missus to feel ridiculous in what you have bought for her. That, and nobody I know gets up in the morning and says to themselves "Oh I think I'll put a basque and stockings on to go to the supermarket". A basque is a very specific item of underwear. And incidentally, they're nearly never bloody comfortable. And if you're one of those fumble-fingereds who can't take a bra off, you'll have fuck all chance at a basque.

    Three: Where the Hell am I Supposed to Wear This Then?

    What do your missus's outer clothes look like? As another poster has already said, he spent €150 on his missus and the underwear's never been out of the box. If you're buying underwear for the bedroom, while Ann Summers is tacky, it'll be less of a waste of money than something she can't physically wear under her day clothes. Plus she won't give a monkey's if you tear if off with your teeth.

    Four: The Rapidly Accelerating Arse

    Ah, pantalooons... Again as a guide, what does your missus wear already? Full briefs, shorties, thongs, bikini briefs, control pants, Bridget Jones granny pants, low rise knickers, high rise knickers, things like look like cycling shorts or sports knickers? Whatever she wears, she picks them for a reason. Chances are it's comfort. I know the fact that women wear high heels is misleading, but much as they'll take blisters they won't spend the day surreptitiously backing up against walls to unobtrusively pick an uncomfortable pair of knickers out of their arse. Not more than once anyway. Or at least not with the same pair.

    Five: How Would You Feel...

    How would you feel if your missus came home one day with a bunch of clothes that weren't like the stuff you normally wear and told you she'd like to see you in them? Buying underwear for your missus is a minefield of emotional subtext - "Does he want me to look like a whore", "Does he think I should wear this stuff all the time", "Am I not sexy enough already", "I feel really uncomfortable in this", "Why does he want me to change", "Who the hell does he think he's kidding expecting me to trot about in this get up like McGuire's fucking pony on show day" etc. etc.

    Your taste is almost guaranteed not to be her taste if you let your inner caveman do the choosing. (You know, him who's all about the tits and the lapdancing.)

    The upshot

    Unless you are 100% sure you have an idea of the sort of taste your missus has in underwear, don't buy her some. It's virtually always a bloody disaster.

    If you really want to buy her something, an alternative could be a single, classic item in a nice fabric, or an item of nightwear. Three words for you: 100% silk chemise.

    Alternatively, if you're not looking to buy her the sort of underwear you'd be happy for her to trot off to work every day wearing, buy her a pair of silk panties. And make sure you call them panties. That's underwear language for 'I didn't buy you these because I thought they'd be comfortable'.


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    #13
    Talliesin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,314 ✭✭✭Talliesin


    ShyMan wrote:
    Well as I said I'll be buying online, so it'd be messy.
    S-Commerce has it's advantages, especially in a good shop where you get proper advice. Also Anne-Summers has some prettier stuff offline since the concession in the shop has different stock than their online stuff (to my mind the online stuff falls between too stools - not pretty enough if you're going for pretty and too tame if you're going for kinky, so it's just tacky).
    ShyMan wrote:
    Sorry a basque was what I had in mind tbh. - I take it I'd use the above for sizing?
    Then there'll be no reduction in waist size. You might find you need to go up one dress size with a basque, and the combination of differences in dress size and cup size make them pretty tricky to buy. You might be better off getting a teddy or something where being a bit off on size doesn't make that much difference. If I'm getting anything that's going to cover both breasts and torso (like a corset or basque) I don't surprise my girl with it, because it's just so much handier in that case to have her pick it.


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    #14
    fits
    Registered Users Posts: 13,270 ✭✭✭✭fits


    Lol @ MAJD

    Very good advice and so true :D Go for the silk chemise...

    OH bought me some stuff once, it didnt even nearly fit and I've never worn it (although the material was nice).

    Shop didnt allow him to return it as they had a 30 day exchange policy and he bought it early :(

    You could bring your girlfriend to a shop such as BT and buy her some stuff that *she* chooses. Now that is something I'd appreciate.


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    #15
    CathyMoran
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 7,458 Mod ✭✭✭✭CathyMoran


    I agree with bringing her into a shop to get them, plus you get to see her in a few different outfits as she tries them on :D


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    #16
    cuckoo
    Registered Users Posts: 1,945 ✭✭✭cuckoo


    If you want to keep it a surprise, maybe a really lovely silk dressing gown? If it is good quality fabric she'll be happy to wear it against her bare skin, and there's no danger of falling into the size trap. And, it is a nice thing to have - the usual 'warm and cozy' dressing gowns that i know a lot of us have are not exactly seductive.

    And, if it works out and she's happy maybe then suggest you go shopping together for basques, etc?


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    #17
    dudara
    Registered Users Posts: 33,519 ✭✭✭✭dudara


    OP, I've requested that this thread be moved to Fashion & Appearance.

    dudara


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