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English Composition

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    #2
    ray2012
    Registered Users Posts: 893 ✭✭✭ray2012


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Hi guys, I've been told that my personal essays/speeches are much stronger than my short story. However, I'm always drawn to this option and would like to keep my options open for the day of the exam.
    Could any English heads read this and give any criticism/feedback?
    Much appreciated :)

    http://ilessthanthreewords.tumblr.com/post/51226907629/after-the-war

    I never answer the short stories as they are not for me, but I still read the story! It's interesting, I must say! But I felt it was lacking any sort of plot. Like nothing drastic really happened in it, in my view. I didn't feel any sort of suspense or thoughts of "what's going to happen next?" in the story.

    Saying all this, I'm not one to criticise as I never attempt the short stories and I'm fairly bad at them!


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    #3
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    ray2012 wrote: »
    I never answer the short stories as they are not for me, but I still read the story! It's interesting, I must say! But I felt it was lacking any sort of plot. Like nothing drastic really happened in it, in my view. I didn't feel any sort of suspense or thoughts of "what's going to happen next?" in the story.

    Saying all this, I'm not one to criticise as I never attempt the short stories and I'm fairly bad at them!

    I feared that as I was writing it. And it seems to be a constant worry when I come up with an idea for a short story. I do think it is very constricting to make any plot development in our allocated time without it reading as the plot is rushed.


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    #4
    Canard
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 8,572 Mod ✭✭✭✭Canard


    It kind of reads a little more like a descriptive essay than a short story at parts, but it's definitely good quality. The thing is, though, it seems a bit...drawn out maybe? To me, it reads more like a chapter of a book than a self-contained short story. This is a thread we had last year where some people posted stories which were quite good if you want to have a look.

    I'd also ask if it's worth the stress. I never did anything but the short story, ever, because I always had the choice in homework, but every time I had to do it in an exam setting I lost a few marks because I'd be panicking. Though the huge advantage to doing the short story is that you can learn off really nice descriptive sentences to use in a tight spot. ;)

    I found on the day I got quite nervous with the story because, I guess with English being so subjective, it's impossible to know how rigidly they'll mark it on purpose marks (and therefore the rest of the marks could be gone if you mess that up). On the other hand, the reason I was never too drawn to personal essays and speeches was because I felt much more creative than opinionated. By the sounds of it you're the same. I think if you were to cut out some of the description (it's nice, but might be hard to fit it all in on the day) and add in some more definite events (so as to have a clear beginning, middle and end) then you could do quite well with it. :) And if you don't like the story titles, you have the other options well-prepared, so it's all good.

    (Oh, and if you want this moved to the Creative Writing forum just ask, they're helpful over there too.)


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    #5
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Canard wrote: »
    It kind of reads a little more like a descriptive essay than a short story at parts, but it's definitely good quality. The thing is, though, it seems a bit...drawn out maybe? To me, it reads more like a chapter of a book than a self-contained short story. This is a thread we had last year where some people posted stories which were quite good if you want to have a look.

    I'd also ask if it's worth the stress. I never did anything but the short story, ever, because I always had the choice in homework, but every time I had to do it in an exam setting I lost a few marks because I'd be panicking. Though the huge advantage to doing the short story is that you can learn off really nice descriptive sentences to use in a tight spot. ;)

    I found on the day I got quite nervous with the story because, I guess with English being so subjective, it's impossible to know how rigidly they'll mark it on purpose marks (and therefore the rest of the marks could be gone if you mess that up). On the other hand, the reason I was never too drawn to personal essays and speeches was because I felt much more creative than opinionated. By the sounds of it you're the same. I think if you were to cut out some of the description (it's nice, but might be hard to fit it all in on the day) and add in some more definite events (so as to have a clear beginning, middle and end) then you could do quite well with it. :) And if you don't like the story titles, you have the other options well-prepared, so it's all good.

    (Oh, and if you want this moved to the Creative Writing forum just ask, they're helpful over there too.)

    Yes that's all I'm trying to do is keep my options open. I do feel that I'm opinionated, given the right topic. But I vaguely remember seeing a personal essay about "Hope" one year and thought to myself that I couldn't get 8-10 well developed paragraphs on it. I have endeavoured to improve my short story skills ever since as they can be a little more lenient with regards to where you can take them.
    Would you be able to move this thread there please? I reckon they could help immensely. And you all picked up on the things I thought while writing... Ooops. Thank you for saying it is of good quality though. :D


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    #6
    aimzLc2
    Registered Users Posts: 662 ✭✭✭aimzLc2


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Hi guys, I've been told that my personal essays/speeches are much stronger than my short story. However, I'm always drawn to this option and would like to keep my options open for the day of the exam.
    Could any English heads read this and give any criticism/feedback?
    Much appreciated :)

    http://ilessthanthreewords.tumblr.com/post/51226907629/after-the-war

    Hey i'm no expert just hoping i can help! I really think if they tell you personal essay/speeches are stronger go for that! I read your short story and it is not weak but your essay may be better? I always pick the short story and mine are actually quite similar to the way you write here , i usually get a B in mine. Importantly they are really strict on structure , i think you need some sort of tension/ climax and resolution in your story that is the structure they look for :)


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    #7
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I usually get a B with my stories too, which I worked up from nearly failing one back in 5th year! And I have every intention of doing a different option as I am the Debate captain so could walk a speech with the right topic.


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    #8
    aimzLc2
    Registered Users Posts: 662 ✭✭✭aimzLc2


    Deleted User wrote: »
    I usually get a B with my stories too, which I worked up from nearly failing one back in 5th year! And I have every intention of doing a different option as I am the Debate captain so could walk a speech with the right topic.

    oh brilliant you are lucky then! i will just have to chance my arm with the short story :P


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    #9
    Leaving Cert Student
    Registered Users Posts: 1,026 ✭✭✭Leaving Cert Student


    Fairly reliant on a good light hearted article or personal essay.. just wondering how much i would be expected to write?


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    #10
    aimzLc2
    Registered Users Posts: 662 ✭✭✭aimzLc2


    Leaving Cert Student wrote: »
    Fairly reliant on a good light hearted article or personal essay.. just wondering how much i would be expected to write?

    my teachers have said about 4 pages to us for the composition.


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    #11
    Leaving Cert Student
    Registered Users Posts: 1,026 ✭✭✭Leaving Cert Student


    aimzLc2 wrote: »
    my teachers have said about 4 pages to us for the composition.

    Grand, I always feel the article merits a little less.. it is an article after all but hopefully the examiner thinks the same!


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    #12
    Kingkumar
    Registered Users Posts: 59 ✭✭Kingkumar


    I thought your essay was really good, lovely description. Its very descriptive but as the others said the story didn't go anywhere so maybe try give 1 or 2 paragraphs to move the story along and then return to the description? maybe a bit more about to what happened to her and her husband? or try link the story more to how its related to after the war?
    Personally, i'm just going to do the short story on the day as you can have essays prepared beforehand and just modify them slightly to suit the question on the day. That's why i love the short stories.
    And they can't really drop you loads on marks on the purpose marks can they? (as long as you stick with whatever u started with) It's creative writing... For example a picture could mean something completely different to 2 different people.

    oh also i only wrote like 2.5-3 pages whenever i did some article type questions and still got like B's. i find it really hard to write 4pages on stuff like that


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    #13
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Kingkumar wrote: »
    I thought your essay was really good, lovely description. Its very descriptive but as the others said the story didn't go anywhere so maybe try give 1 or 2 paragraphs to move the story along and then return to the description? maybe a bit more about to what happened to her and her husband? or try link the story more to how its related to after the war?
    Personally, i'm just going to do the short story on the day as you can have essays prepared beforehand and just modify them slightly to suit the question on the day. That's why i love the short stories.
    And they can't really drop you loads on marks on the purpose marks can they? (as long as you stick with whatever u started with) It's creative writing... For example a picture could mean something completely different to 2 different people.

    oh also i only wrote like 2.5-3 pages whenever i did some article type questions and still got like B's. i find it really hard to write 4pages on stuff like that

    Thank you very much :) Well my original concept was that her and her husband were in the war but I was afraid to spell it out explicitly as my teacher tells me I have a tendency to ramble.
    I'm just trying to improve my writing :) You never know how your story will change on the day. For example, last year was about an 18 year old character wanting to leave town and I wrote about a promiscuous girl who falls pregnant by the priest and leaves due to nobody believing her. So that had more plot whereas with this one, I dunno, I think "after the war" lends itself to a certain numbness and I tried to capture that in the story.


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    #14
    Canard
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 8,572 Mod ✭✭✭✭Canard


    Thread moved and I left a redirect so people from the LC forum can still drop in with advice, good luck with your writing! :)


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    #15
    Leaving Cert Student
    Registered Users Posts: 1,026 ✭✭✭Leaving Cert Student


    Is a light hearted article or popular magazine article a guarantee to come up? And is it easy to score well on the personal essay?


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    #16
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Leaving Cert Student wrote: »
    Is a light hearted article or popular magazine article a guarantee to come up? And is it easy to score well on the personal essay?

    I'm not too sure to be honest for the article as I have never paid much attention to them myself.
    You will score well in the personal essay if you do as the title suggests and make it personal. If you're making a point, give an anecdote, tell them what your friend said to you about the topic before. Try as much as you can to show your personality! If you're funny, be funny. If you're not, that's fine too! You just need to be honest in your essay with a good standard of English and you'll get marks.
    In the mocks, I wrote about the title "Things Important to Me" and it was very informal. I brought the examiner into my world and even addressed the fact that it snowed the morning of my Pre and that I was angry about it. It wasn't the best essay I ever wrote by apparently my personality shone (Jesus, is that a word?) through and I got 82 out of 100, not bad for only 3 pages.
    I can send you a sample if you like?


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    #17
    Leaving Cert Student
    Registered Users Posts: 1,026 ✭✭✭Leaving Cert Student


    Ya it might be nice to see a personal essay before the big day in the event a suitable article doesn't come up! Cheers


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