Proposal Ring

Redsox Rover · 25-09-2014 10:11am #1

Hi All,

Hoping someone can help me with some advice. I am planning on proposing to my girlfriend very soon. I have made the preperations as to how I am going to propose and I already know that I will be proposing with a "proposal" ring and then purchasing the engagement ring with my Girlfriend.

This is where the problem arises. She has always dreamed of going to Tiffanys in New York and buying the ring and I am determined to make this happen for her. However due to our circumstances with work we are unable to take any time off between now and January so she will in effect be wearing the proposal ring for approx 3-4 months. We are also moving country in the next couple of months and it is important to me that I ask her before we leave as Ireland is so important to us and our families are here. I also see the proposal ring as being quite important as it is the ring I am asking her to spend the rest of her life with me with.

I have a medium sized budget and I have decded the proposal ring will be different to a diamond engagement ring as i would like for her to want to wear it on her other hand when we do purchase the engagement ring. I am thinking Sapphire on white gold and maybe a surround of smaller diamonds. I have seen a ring I like.

The questions I have are:

1) Is 3-4 months too long to wait to go buy the actual engagement ring?

2) I know price is relaive to your sistuation and taste but what would be a reasonable amount to spend on the proposal ring?

Thanks for all your help.

jameshayes · 25-09-2014 10:14am

I know you didn't ask this - but regarding the tiffany thing, I would suggest you go to Tiffanys for a browse and enjoy the experience - then go elsewhere for the actual purchase. There would be no point buying something in 1 shop for twice the price as the one next door when both are identical quality..

1. I dont think 3-4 months is long, but the only concern I'd have is if after 3-4 months of considering the price of rings, she wont want to get one and will end up keeping the proposal ring
2. If its a gift for life I don't think cost will matter really... spend what you think you can..

Redsox Rover · 25-09-2014 10:23am

Thanks jameshayes.

That is good advice. I should have said in my original post that the Tiffanys she has dreamt of is New York. We will browse jewellers here and in the city we move to but ultimately I do want to give her her dream.

Pistachios & cream · 25-09-2014 10:27am

Is there any other ring your girlfriend has shown an interest in? My fiancee got me an infinity ring as the proposal ring as i had mentioned i would like one of these and he knew i would wear it. Only place he could find it was tiffanys and going by their website it's about €500.

I don't think 3-4 months is too long especially as you say you are leaving the country, Therefore people won't be asking about the ring. It does tend to be the first question everybody asks

Redsox Rover · 25-09-2014 10:40am

Hi ahayes84,

Thanks for your message.

She has shown an interest in a Blue Sapphire ring which is in and around the price you mentioned. She does not wear much jewellery either so i don't want to go too big or sparkly as it just is not her.

She is very into experiences and I am putting alot of time and effort into the actual proposal. The ring is important aswell obviously as it really is a symbol of my love and our committment together. I just want to make sure I get it right.

I also don't want to put her in the situation where she has to explain to people that this is'nt her engagement ring etc.

nosietoes · 25-09-2014 11:05am

I agree with james Hayes, Tiffany's in NY is a great experience but you are paying for the name as well as the diamond and metal. It would make more sense in a value for money way to go to the diamond district in NY after trying on Tiffany rings and see the comparison.

jameshayes · 25-09-2014 11:17am

nosietoes wrote: »

I agree with james Hayes, Tiffany's in NY is a great experience but you are paying for the name as well as the diamond and metal. It would make more sense in a value for money way to go to the diamond district in NY after trying on Tiffany rings and see the comparison.

Yip... here are the 2 scenarios:

1. Tiffany ring: its a pity the stone is half the size of one you could have gotten from another shop - but omg its tiffany's!!
2. Ring from normal jeweler: wow - thank god I got a bigger diamond, its a pity it doesn't have tiffany written on the inside of the band that no one will ever see though...

amdublin · 25-09-2014 9:53pm

Why spend a lot of money on a proposal ring when instead you can put it towards the engagement ring.

Instead I'd suggest you look at dress rings in Marks and Spencers and Oasis etc.

They look like engagement rings and cost about €15.

Nb. Golden rule of proposal ring - do not buy a stone that is bigger than what you can afford when you go to buy the real thing!!!

fits · 26-09-2014 9:47am

Why bother with a proposal ring at all? Don't think it would be for me anyway.

pooch90 · 26-09-2014 10:20am

Proposal rings don't need to be over elaborate, think this is all a bit OTT.
A sapphire as a token?? Are you made of money?
The Tiffany thing is way over the top too.

Redsox Rover · 26-09-2014 2:48pm

I appreciate all of the responses and I understand and accept everyones point of view. I also understand how many people would see this a sbeing over the top however what is over the top for 1 person is not for another.

Everyone has different ideas of what they want from their relationship, engagement, wedding. For example some people like great big extravagant events and others like to have something a bit more low key.

I firmly believe the proposal and engagement is about the couple and what fits with their relationship. My better half would be happy with a cheap token ring from M&S however I know she would be over the moon with a moderately expensive ring to propose with. As i said this ring is the 1 I am proposing with and it needs to capture what we are. The Tiffanys thing is her dream and as her hopefully future husband I am going to do everything I can to make her dreams come true.

Whether we are made of money is of no relevance to the issues I wanted advice on and got great advice from everyone that has posted here.

Again thank you all for taking the time to respond and pass on your advice.

shopaholic86 · 26-09-2014 4:08pm

My fiance got me a Pandora ring as my proposal ring. We were travelling at the time and in NZ and we had another 4 months of travelling left. It was a great idea cos it has lasted really well rather than a really cheap one (which can tarnish) and I'll keep it forever. It cost about €90, so not too pricey.

Waiting a few months to buy a ring is no big deal, it should be about the moment and the commitment, the ring can wait. We're getting mine next month and I like that I've had time to look for what I want and that my OH has saved some money up. There of course have been some snobby - "where is your diamond" remarks, but those people are just idiots.

shopaholic86 · 26-09-2014 4:10pm

My fiance got me a Pandora ring as my proposal ring. We were travelling at the time and in NZ and we had another 4 months of travelling left. It was a great idea cos it has lasted really well rather than a really cheap one (which can tarnish) and I'll keep it forever. It cost about €90, so not too pricey.

Waiting a few months to buy a ring is no big deal, it should be about the moment and the commitment, the ring can wait. We're getting mine next month and I like that I've had time to look for what I want and that my OH has saved some money up. There of course have been some snobby - "where is your diamond" remarks, but those people are just idiots.

Enjoy it!

December2012 · 26-09-2014 10:25pm

I think you know her best and the sapphire ring sounds lovely!

lm01 · 26-09-2014 10:32pm

Propose in the time and place you want with the ring you want. Encourage her to wear it on her right hand from the outset so there's no confusion about it being her engagement ring. Do the Tiffany thing when time and money allow.

You will get a bigger diamond for the same money elsewhere, but if the experience is more important to her, that's what counts.

daelight · 01-10-2014 1:58am

Just to confirm.. This will be a 3 ring'er? Proposal ring -> Engagement ring -> Wedding ring ... ?

01-10-2014 2:17am

Its really lovely that you want to give your girlfriend her dream, however, buying a ring in Tiffany's, just because its famous is crazy!!
Go to Tiffany's, have a look around, then go to the diamond district in new York, can't rem the exact area, I think its around 42/45 th streets. A huge amount of jewellery shops, you can get whatever you like here for half the price.

Unless you're made of money, why spend more for the same thing somewhere else??

Hold the Cheez Whiz · 01-10-2014 2:21am

daelight wrote: »

Just to confirm.. This will be a 3 ring'er? Proposal ring -> Engagement ring -> Wedding ring ... ?

Yeah, I'm confused too. Does this mean that you propose with a ring that you pick out, and then you go together to pick out an engagement ring (which is worn with the wedding ring when you get married)?

Redsox Rover · 01-10-2014 8:43am

Ring bought and proposal will be this Saturday.

To answer the question about it being a 3 ringer. Yes it will be. The ring that I am proposing with will hopefully be kept and worn on the right hand. (Not a Diamond ring) the proposal ring was not expensive at all. Realised I needed to reign it in a bit. She will still love the ring.

The engagement ring will be bought in New York. Where we buy it will be her choice completely. She is not a greedy or materialistic person at all. She will pick the ring that is right for her.

There will also be a wedding ring this time next year so that will be the 3 rings. 2 on the left and 1 on the right.

Thank you to everyone for your advice! Bring on Saturday

December2012 · 01-10-2014 11:04am

I wear three rings myself. A family ring, engagement ring and a wedding ring. Some people also wear an eternity ring on the celebration of a specific event (like the birth if a child or 10 year anniversary).

So 3 rings is not unusual - like everything else it's a matter of personality and taste.

Enjoy the proposal and congratulations!

Broken Strings · 01-10-2014 11:25am

Best of luck Redsox Rover! The proposal is such an exciting time, I hope you both have a lovely day on Saturday!

Let us know how it goes

amdublin · 01-10-2014 5:39pm

Good luck and enjoy!

Redsox Rover · 09-10-2014 12:21pm

Quick update. Proposal went to plan and she said yes! Celebrations ongoing!

Broken Strings · 09-10-2014 12:25pm

Congratulations Redsox Rover, and to the future Mrs. Redsox Rover too

amdublin · 09-10-2014 5:26pm

Good job Redsox Rover!

Kevin the Kid · 29-10-2014 9:24pm

Congratulations
Where did you pop the question?
I'm thinking of doing the same myself.
The crowds are suggestion Rockefeller center.

Proposal Ring

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