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Is there some truth to the perception that gay men are promiscuous?

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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 197 ✭✭daithi84


    The one night stand culture exists in both gay and straight social scenes. Gay men are more open and direct when it comes to sex, but i wouldnt say that gay men as a whole are more or less 'promiscuous' than straight men.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 370 ✭✭Stepping Stone


    I am not a gay man, so I cannot offer any insight into the perceived promiscuity, however I am curious about how it started.

    Is it possible that it was because for hundreds of years, homosexuality was by varying degrees illegal/ taboo that it either forced men to think that instead of finding love and happiness and living good quality (emotionally) lives that the best that they could hope for was a fleeting encounter with another person, and that loneliness and desire would increase the likelihood of these encounters, leading to a perception of promiscuity or perhaps, actual promiscuity in the case of individuals?

    I would like to think that anyone growing up now can hope, regardless of sexuality that they have as much hope of finding the right person and living the life they want as the next person.

    As for casual sex now, there is just an acceptance of it socially. I do wonder if it is actually easier for two people of the same gender to communicate desire (leading to higher success rates) than it is for two people of the opposite sex, based purely on communication and understanding.


  • Registered Users Posts: 197 ✭✭daithi84


    I am not a gay man, so I cannot offer any insight into the perceived promiscuity, however I am curious about how it started.

    Is it possible that it was because for hundreds of years, homosexuality was by varying degrees illegal/ taboo that it either forced men to think that instead of finding love and happiness and living good quality (emotionally) lives that the best that they could hope for was a fleeting encounter with another person, and that loneliness and desire would increase the likelihood of these encounters, leading to a perception of promiscuity or perhaps, actual promiscuity in the case of individuals?

    I would like to think that anyone growing up now can hope, regardless of sexuality that they have as much hope of finding the right person and living the life they want as the next person.

    As for casual sex now, there is just an acceptance of it socially. I do wonder if it is actually easier for two people of the same gender to communicate desire (leading to higher success rates) than it is for two people of the opposite sex, based purely on communication and understanding.

    I would agree with that. Gay people were forced underground and the only chance of an encounter with the same sex was quick encounters. These could not lead to relationships per se as if you were suspected of being gay you would have been arrested and sent to prison.

    i would also agree that if you are looking for casual sex it is easier to communicate that with the same sex than the opposite sex.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 370 ✭✭Stepping Stone


    daithi84 wrote: »
    Gay people were forced underground and the only chance of an encounter with the same sex was quick encounters. These could not lead to relationships per se as if you were suspected of being gay you would have been arrested and sent to prison.

    It is actually heartbreaking to think of people spending their lives alone, unhappy and living a lie for something as trivial as sexuality. I know it isn't trivial to the individual but on the grand scale of things, it should rank up there with the state of your toenails on how it impacts the way you live your life. :(


  • Registered Users Posts: 80 ✭✭MiloDublin


    Gore Vidal: men are squirters, woman are squatters
    For men its a quick climax but woman have to deal with the result and sit on the nest.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,734 ✭✭✭J_E


    MiloDublin wrote: »
    Gore Vidal: men are squirters, woman are squatters
    For men its a quick climax but woman have to deal with the result and sit on the nest.

    Not sure what that means...women can have a quick climax too (and then more!) without any consequences.

    Found the quote;

    "Men are squirters, they can squirt here, squirt there, it doesn't take much & can happen again & again. Women on the other hand are more methodical, they have much more at risk & they only become 'activated' once a month. Whereas a man is activate AT LEAST once a week."

    I don't know if this is really fair though. If anything it's women who can climax over and over, not men! I think maybe he was referring more to fertility.


  • Registered Users Posts: 197 ✭✭daithi84


    Here is an extract from wikipedia on the history of homosexuality during the 1950's and 1960's which summarises the persecution gay people experienced in America around that time, this attitude was also rampant in Europe after WW2.

    "Throughout the 1950s and 1960s, the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) and police departments kept lists of known homosexuals, their favored establishments, and friends; the U.S. Post Office kept track of addresses where material pertaining to homosexuality was mailed.[12] State and local governments followed suit: bars catering to homosexuals were shut down, and their customers were arrested and exposed in newspapers. Cities performed "sweeps" to rid neighborhoods, parks, bars, and beaches of gay people. They outlawed the wearing of opposite gender clothes, and universities expelled instructors suspected of being homosexual.[13] Thousands of gay men and women were publicly humiliated, physically harassed, fired, jailed, or institutionalized in mental hospitals. Many lived double lives, keeping their private lives secret from their professional ones.

    In 1952, the American Psychiatric Association listed homosexuality in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) as a mental disorder. A large-scale study of homosexuality in 1962 was used to justify inclusion of the disorder as a supposed pathological hidden fear of the opposite sex caused by traumatic parent–child relationships. This view was widely influential in the medical profession.[14] In 1956, however, the psychologist Evelyn Hooker performed a study that compared the happiness and well-adjusted nature of self-identified homosexual men with heterosexual men and found no difference.[15] Her study stunned the medical community and made her a hero to many gay men and lesbians,[16] but homosexuality remained in the DSM until 1973."


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,824 ✭✭✭floggg


    Cydoniac wrote: »
    Not sure what that means...women can have a quick climax too (and then more!) without any consequences.

    Found the quote;

    "Men are squirters, they can squirt here, squirt there, it doesn't take much & can happen again & again. Women on the other hand are more methodical, they have much more at risk & they only become 'activated' once a month. Whereas a man is activate AT LEAST once a week."

    I don't know if this is really fair though. If anything it's women who can climax over and over, not men! I think maybe he was referring more to fertility.

    It's outdated BS.

    I "activate" a lot more than once a week I can assure you.

    Women are also capable of activating a lot more often. It says more about the prevailing attitudes to sex at that time than about actual human sexuality.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,512 ✭✭✭baby and crumble


    In all honesty, if I could have sex every single day I would. I'm female. This whole sex drives rubbish is exactly that. Rubbish. Everyone is different. Nobody is wrong either- if your natural drive is once a month good luck to you I say. Mine seems to be every 5 or 6 minutes sometimes!!! As the great Rachel Berry once said "Do you want to know a secret none of them tell you? Girls want sex just as much as guys do!"


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