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Advice re cheater

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  • 24-11-2014 8:49pm
    #1
    uncertain2014
    Registered Users Posts: 2 ✭


    Hi,
    looking for some advice. Started texting a guy I met online, we met up pretty quick and had like a really really great time, all above board. Met him again very soon after, got on really well again. I've been on ****ty dates and this definitely wasn't one of them.
    he has gone back to the UK, he works between here and there. He is home in a few weeks and want to meet me again. I'm delighted naturally. We have been talking on Whatsapp most days since he went back.
    Found him on Facebook pretty easily and well he has a girlfriend over there.
    Pretty ****ty, he seemed really genuine and I'd consider myself a pretty good judge of character and thought we really hit it off.

    Anyway, just looking for advice of my next step, I'm thinking just stop contact completely?


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    #2
    beertons
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 23,065 ✭✭✭✭beertons


    Don't look at his profile again, delete his number, and move on. Lousey thing to do by him.


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    #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I'd call him out on it. Be upfront, say you searched him in FB& found out he had a girlfriend. *then* say goodbye & good luck.
    If you just disappear with no explanation, you end up looking like the flakey one.
    Also, in case there's any chance you're mistaken, it allows him the chance to explain himself.


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    #4
    Dellnum
    Registered Users Posts: 262 ✭✭Dellnum


    I agree to ask him out straight has he got a g/f. He could have, but that doesn't mean that he doesn't find you attractive and maybe he is falling for you. All you can do is ask him. He might be just trying to have someone in both countries for company, so you need to be aware of that too.


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    #5
    Paco Rodriguez
    Closed Accounts Posts: 701 ✭✭✭Paco Rodriguez


    OP facebook isn't the be all and end all for everyone. Perhaps he doesn't use it very often and forgot to change his status after a recent break up?

    Maybe send an obvious post to him saying you enjoyed the date. If it gets deleted maybe he is trying to hide things.


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    #6
    nadey
    Registered Users Posts: 367 ✭✭nadey


    Block him off everything before you get too deep and develop feeling for him, he will probably give you the usual excuses it's difficult to her, I don't love her, we're not happy ect I wouldn't even waste another thought on the snake


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    #7
    CaraMay
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,652 ✭✭✭CaraMay


    Leave a message on his timeline saying you can't wait for that date he promised you. What a snake.


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    #8
    B.A._Baracus
    Registered Users Posts: 11,179 ✭✭✭✭B.A._Baracus


    uncertain2014 wrote: »
    Anyway, just looking for advice of my next step, I'm thinking just stop contact completely?

    Let's look at the logic. He is in a relationship with someone else while he had dates with you. Alot can be said about him but reality (and again logically) is that he is trying to pull the wool over your eyes and thinks you are none the wiser. Of course you since you found him on Facebook.

    A, Tell him you know whats up. If he accepts that you know the score and moves on. So be it and you move on.
    B, If he tries to feed you a line of BS? send his girlfriend a message.
    uncertain2014 wrote: »
    Hi,
    Pretty ****ty, he seemed really genuine and I'd consider myself a pretty good judge of character and thought we really hit it off.

    Don't be hard on yourself. Takes months to get to know someone. Let alone a person who can hide his actual life by travelling with his job.


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    #9
    skallywag
    Registered Users Posts: 2,987 ✭✭✭skallywag


    I would not think FB the be-all-end-all of defining who is doing what. Is it just because he is listed as 'being in a relationship' etc? I know both men and women who have such a status still listed, but who to all intents and purposes are really single in reality.


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    #10
    Crets
    Registered Users Posts: 12 ✭Crets


    He may have just forgot to change his status so if you talk to him and he does change it and put you it's a good thing right?

    BUT have both eyes open cause he may not have forgotten.


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    #11
    B.A._Baracus
    Registered Users Posts: 11,179 ✭✭✭✭B.A._Baracus


    Interesting point by the two posters above...
    Op, is it just "in relationship" that is displayed? or does it say "in relationship with... jane smith" (etc) and from photos it's clear there is a relationship?


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