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My alcohol free life is crap ..................

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  • 11-04-2011 7:33am
    #1
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭


    When I ditched the booze....
    I thought.....................
    My life would change....

    I would become happier, more confident, everything would slot into place, my troubles would be over, I would be on easy street, Nothing would worry me or upset me, life would be a piece of cake, my brain would work differently, I would be happy all the time, I would no longer have depression or sad thoughts, I would have a wonderful life, people would applaud me, fanfares would sound and angels would sing..

    NOTHING prepared me for the brutal reality that this wasn't the case.
    I felt cheated and disappointed and somewhat angry that I had put in all the work to kick booze and I didn't feel any different, my life was NOT any better, and yes I wondered why I even bothered...what was the bloody point..you were meant to feel better..right?? It was meant to get better? Life was meant to change.....

    It didn't except for...

    My clear head in the mornings and the feel of clarity on waking...

    No hangovers, headaches and sick tummy..

    No flashbacks of things said and done and no cringe factor upon remembering.

    The bedtime stories now told lovingly to my grandchildren instead of the excuses as to why I couldnt read them as I had to go and relax with first drink of the evening or the pub.

    The money I have saved by not buying alcohol and smokes.

    The compliments I have received telling me how well I look.

    The feeling of freedom knowing that alcohol has no hold over me, I have broken free of its power and I am living independant of it.

    The problems that are there are now being dealt with and not swept under the carpet in a drunken haze.

    The little pieces of me that emerge day to day...new pieces of my personality that have been stifled by alcohol.

    The feeling of LIVING and not just drifting along from day to day doing the same old thing and expecting different results.

    The feeling of acomplishment, and getting to like myself again ( I am not at the loving myself bit yet but still working on it, we are all a work in progress)

    The knowledge that, although I felt like a fish out of water the first few times I went out socially, it is slowly but surely getting much better and easier to handle and when I look around and see some of the antics going on , I feel blessed that I have made the decision not to be the ringleader any more.

    The chance to FEEL........I mean really feel...all my emotions...without the crippling distorted illusion of alcohol..I can identify my feelings and deal with them accordingly.

    And finally the realisation that my problems are still there, money worries still present, sadness, fear and confusion are with me on a regular basis...BUT I can deal with them now...feel them, understand them and know why I am feeling this way..instead of burying them or intensifying them with the help of alcohol.

    In conclusion....life is not all sweetness and light, not the perfect world I did expect it to be..but it is a Utopia in comparison to the one I was existing in and for that I will be eternally grateful.:)


«1

Comments

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    #2
    finnigan
    Registered Users Posts: 58 ✭✭finnigan


    thanks mate, life aint great all the time but reading your post reminded me why i stopped drinking in the first place.
    thanks again and aint mondays great?? :D


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    #3
    NecroSteve
    Registered Users Posts: 165 ✭✭NecroSteve


    Ooooh sh1t buzz! ;)

    Nah, great post! I especially like the method of drawing in the you-can't-have-fun-sober eejits with that beginning.


  • Options
    #4
    hubba
    Registered Users Posts: 376 ✭✭hubba


    Wonderful post. Sounds so good I might join you there soon.


  • Options
    #5
    K.C
    Registered Users Posts: 572 ✭✭✭K.C


    Great post, thanks


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    #6
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Great post, brother! I think the first part of your post is where people fall down the most. We all want miracle fixes when the reality is that things take time.

    How long have you been off the booze?


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    #7
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    I am 2 years 4 months or 825 alcohol free days but who is counting and feeling great :-)


  • Options
    #8
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    realies wrote: »
    I am 2 years 4 months or 825 alcohol free days but who is counting and feeling great :-)

    That's what it's all about brother!


  • Options
    #9
    cleanslate
    Registered Users Posts: 95 ✭✭cleanslate


    Well done on 2 years and 4 months!... nice post... it's what motivates us to keep it up :)


  • Options
    #10
    Forest Fire
    Registered Users Posts: 115 ✭✭Forest Fire


    Well done and thanks for what may lie ahead.:)


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    #11
    bluefinger
    Registered Users Posts: 1,800 ✭✭✭bluefinger


    brilliant post and a good reminder too that it's not all sweetness and light giving up the sauce. coming up to two years off it myself in September and I have to say there was a serious amount of adjustment, especially living in such a drink dominated culture. :( It is worth it though.


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    #12
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    A reminder of why I haven't had a drink in nearly four years ;-)


  • Options
    #13
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    hubba wrote: »
    Wonderful post. Sounds so good I might join you there soon.


    And you did Hubba ;) great work.


  • Options
    #14
    Forest Fire
    Registered Users Posts: 115 ✭✭Forest Fire


    realies wrote: »
    When I ditched the booze....
    I thought.....................
    My life would change....

    I would become happier, more confident, everything would slot into place, my troubles would be over, I would be on easy street, Nothing would worry me or upset me, life would be a piece of cake, my brain would work differently, I would be happy all the time, I would no longer have depression or sad thoughts, I would have a wonderful life, people would applaud me, fanfares would sound and angels would sing..

    NOTHING prepared me for the brutal reality that this wasn't the case.
    I felt cheated and disappointed and somewhat angry that I had put in all the work to kick booze and I didn't feel any different, my life was NOT any better, and yes I wondered why I even bothered...what was the bloody point..you were meant to feel better..right?? It was meant to get better? Life was meant to change.....

    It didn't except for...

    My clear head in the mornings and the feel of clarity on waking...

    No hangovers, headaches and sick tummy..

    No flashbacks of things said and done and no cringe factor upon remembering.

    The bedtime stories now told lovingly to my grandchildren instead of the excuses as to why I couldnt read them as I had to go and relax with first drink of the evening or the pub.

    The money I have saved by not buying alcohol and smokes.

    The compliments I have received telling me how well I look.

    The feeling of freedom knowing that alcohol has no hold over me, I have broken free of its power and I am living independant of it.

    The problems that are there are now being dealt with and not swept under the carpet in a drunken haze.

    The little pieces of me that emerge day to day...new pieces of my personality that have been stifled by alcohol.

    The feeling of LIVING and not just drifting along from day to day doing the same old thing and expecting different results.

    The feeling of acomplishment, and getting to like myself again ( I am not at the loving myself bit yet but still working on it, we are all a work in progress)

    The knowledge that, although I felt like a fish out of water the first few times I went out socially, it is slowly but surely getting much better and easier to handle and when I look around and see some of the antics going on , I feel blessed that I have made the decision not to be the ringleader any more.

    The chance to FEEL........I mean really feel...all my emotions...without the crippling distorted illusion of alcohol..I can identify my feelings and deal with them accordingly.

    And finally the realisation that my problems are still there, money worries still present, sadness, fear and confusion are with me on a regular basis...BUT I can deal with them now...feel them, understand them and know why I am feeling this way..instead of burying them or intensifying them with the help of alcohol.

    In conclusion....life is not all sweetness and light, not the perfect world I did expect it to be..but it is a Utopia in comparison to the one I was existing in and for that I will be eternally grateful.:)

    After reading your article, it dragged up a lot of emotion in me and its hard to stop crying. I still drink but follow this thread to help control it. i realize I cannot i need to stop. i then sent a mail to my wife which goes...


    'Just read this article below.
    I feel I need to do something about myself.
    I feel I am becoming sneaky and dishonest with you and myself about my drinking.
    I do spend quite a bit of time in the evenings thinking about when I'm going to have a drink, sometimes more than about you and the kids.
    I don't want to feel this way as I love you and the kids and I resent my draw to alcohol.
    I'm kind of scared about what giving up the booze would mean for my life.
    I feel like a coward in a lot of ways.
    Maybe i am in a bad place at the moment but i know even when I'm feeling good about things I need a drink.
    I know I need to make this call myself but it is difficult.
    I'ld say you are sick of hearing me say all this and do nothing.'

    I need to quit. This thread has helped me realize this. I hope I can.


  • Options
    #15
    hubba
    Registered Users Posts: 376 ✭✭hubba


    realies wrote: »
    And you did Hubba ;) great work.

    Well spotted, Realies! Yes, indeed I did join you. Day 500 this Monday and I am so happy I took the plunge. And thanks to you and everyone in here for the support, it really is helpful. :)


  • Options
    #16
    derealbadger
    Registered Users Posts: 1,101 ✭✭✭derealbadger


    Forest Fire wrote: »
    After reading your article, it dragged up a lot of emotion in me and its hard to stop crying. I still drink but follow this thread to help control it. i realize I cannot i need to stop. i then sent a mail to my wife which goes...


    'Just read this article below.
    I feel I need to do something about myself.
    I feel I am becoming sneaky and dishonest with you and myself about my drinking.
    I do spend quite a bit of time in the evenings thinking about when I'm going to have a drink, sometimes more than about you and the kids.
    I don't want to feel this way as I love you and the kids and I resent my draw to alcohol.
    I'm kind of scared about what giving up the booze would mean for my life.
    I feel like a coward in a lot of ways.
    Maybe i am in a bad place at the moment but i know even when I'm feeling good about things I need a drink.
    I know I need to make this call myself but it is difficult.
    I'ld say you are sick of hearing me say all this and do nothing.'

    I need to quit. This thread has helped me realize this. I hope I can.

    Best of luck realising you have a problem is the greatest share of sorting it out this will be my 4th Christmass sober and it is just so different I really wish you well and your family


  • Options
    #17
    baileatha
    Registered Users Posts: 15 ✭baileatha


    realies wrote: »
    When I ditched the booze....
    I thought.....................
    My life would change....

    I would become happier, more confident, everything would slot into place, my troubles would be over, I would be on easy street, Nothing would worry me or upset me, life would be a piece of cake, my brain would work differently, I would be happy all the time, I would no longer have depression or sad thoughts, I would have a wonderful life, people would applaud me, fanfares would sound and angels would sing..

    NOTHING prepared me for the brutal reality that this wasn't the case.
    I felt cheated and disappointed and somewhat angry that I had put in all the work to kick booze and I didn't feel any different, my life was NOT any better, and yes I wondered why I even bothered...what was the bloody point..you were meant to feel better..right?? It was meant to get better? Life was meant to change.....

    It didn't except for...

    My clear head in the mornings and the feel of clarity on waking...

    No hangovers, headaches and sick tummy..

    No flashbacks of things said and done and no cringe factor upon remembering.

    The bedtime stories now told lovingly to my grandchildren instead of the excuses as to why I couldnt read them as I had to go and relax with first drink of the evening or the pub.

    The money I have saved by not buying alcohol and smokes.

    The compliments I have received telling me how well I look.

    The feeling of freedom knowing that alcohol has no hold over me, I have broken free of its power and I am living independant of it.

    The problems that are there are now being dealt with and not swept under the carpet in a drunken haze.

    The little pieces of me that emerge day to day...new pieces of my personality that have been stifled by alcohol.

    The feeling of LIVING and not just drifting along from day to day doing the same old thing and expecting different results.

    The feeling of acomplishment, and getting to like myself again ( I am not at the loving myself bit yet but still working on it, we are all a work in progress)

    The knowledge that, although I felt like a fish out of water the first few times I went out socially, it is slowly but surely getting much better and easier to handle and when I look around and see some of the antics going on , I feel blessed that I have made the decision not to be the ringleader any more.

    The chance to FEEL........I mean really feel...all my emotions...without the crippling distorted illusion of alcohol..I can identify my feelings and deal with them accordingly.

    And finally the realisation that my problems are still there, money worries still present, sadness, fear and confusion are with me on a regular basis...BUT I can deal with them now...feel them, understand them and know why I am feeling this way..instead of burying them or intensifying them with the help of alcohol.

    In conclusion....life is not all sweetness and light, not the perfect world I did expect it to be..but it is a Utopia in comparison to the one I was existing in and for that I will be eternally grateful.:)

    Thank you.


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    #18
    xim2
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 20 ✭xim2


    great post :)


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    #19
    albertxxx
    Registered Users Posts: 1 ✭albertxxx


    my first day today want so much to keep it up feeling good about my chances and feel this forum will help ty.


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    #20
    hubba
    Registered Users Posts: 376 ✭✭hubba


    Best wishes, albertxxx. You are doing the right thing.


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    #21
    supackofidiots
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 187 ✭✭supackofidiots


    Alcohol is a drug, shame so many people don't realise that. Socially conditioned to believe it is part of normal life. I genuinely don't know how they do it. I see friends putting their bodies through hell three times a week and I physically would not be able to do it. It's horrendous. I see my friends planning twelve pubs for the 23rd, and going to the pub also on christmas eve. I think that is a really sad state to be in. Two years ago I would probably have been the one organising the twelve pubs. Woke up in the drunk tank one christmas morning, me and another one of my mates were singing fairytale of new york with it snowing as we walked down the street on christmas morning pissed out of our minds. Rock bottom isn't the word. I'm going to enjoy my Christmas by getting up early, playing the new call of duty santy is bringing me, with a fresh head, a ferrero rocher and a cool glass of diet coke. :)


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    #22
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    Just thought I would bump this.


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    #23
    xzanti
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,436 Mod ✭✭✭✭xzanti


    I never get tired of reading that post! so inspiring :D


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    #24
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 8,016 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Never read that before Realies, brilliant post mate. People like you make this forum great


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    #25
    Carpet diem
    Registered Users Posts: 543 ✭✭✭Carpet diem


    Great post. And so true - the problems don't disappear.


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    #26
    beano345
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,105 ✭✭✭beano345


    good post my mates going through the "life is boring without booze thing" after been off it a month finding it hard to meet women aswell he says


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    #27
    BraziliaNZ
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,671 ✭✭✭BraziliaNZ


    I see what you did there!
    But no I was hoping you were saying life without drink is crap so I could justify my death defying regular binges.


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    #28
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    Always inspirational post for me. Least we forget.


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    #29
    Carpet diem
    Registered Users Posts: 543 ✭✭✭Carpet diem


    Not getting on great this week.

    I was thinking thou it's not due to not drinking more due to issues that I'm not sweeping under the carpet when I go drinking.

    Work and dealing with people in work bothering me but hopefully I get to the root of it over time and become bit happier.


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    #30
    cleanslate
    Registered Users Posts: 95 ✭✭cleanslate


    we're lucky that we have somewhere to go to let out frustration and rant about stuff that is bothering us, the normal everyday stuff that everyone has to put up with.... 'this too shall pass' and hopefully work has gotten a little better for you already :)


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    #31
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    Nice to read again as it means the same to me today as when it was first posted.


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