The least stressful job...

saabsaab · 16-04-2015 6:55pm

Not public sector nowdays anyway..

Dog walker?
Library Assistant in small town/village

Capt'n Midnight · 19-04-2015 1:05am

Mesrine65 wrote: »

Beer taster

Think of the consequences.

you wouldn't be able to have a nice quite drink in a pub ever again

you'd know instantly what was wrong with each pint you got, too gassy, head 1mm too short, wrong temperature, keg left out in the sun too long, lines not cleaned

handy money, but you'd only be able to drink spirits on a night out

Dozer Dave · 19-04-2015 1:09am

The Rodgers wrote: »

That sounds grim. Long shifts, intensively repetitive and probably cold.

They would have central heating installed in 2013.

FueledbyCoffee · 19-04-2015 1:34am

Travel reporter, get to go to the nicest hotels in all different locations all expenses paid - yes please

NachoBusiness · 19-04-2015 1:58am

Invent something, go on Dragon's Den and cause a bidding war, retire to the car-rib-ian.

Diabhal Beag · 19-04-2015 1:59am

Dozer Dave wrote: »

They would have central heating installed in 2013.

I'm reading this like the rolling text on Reeling in the Years

dubscottie · 19-04-2015 2:07am

Call Me Jimmy wrote: »

Grass-Cutter: Forrest Gump style, this is the most appealling at the moment.

(No.)

Greenkeeper by trade.. Have to get the grass to grow before you can cut it.

Getting very hot hydraulic oil on a green when a hose bursts,

Trying not to get hit by golf balls..

Add to that pricks in the pub on a Friday asking what the course is like for the weekend..

Did it with the local council too..

Having to watch for dog **** or needles when using a strimmer (and a box of shotgun cartridges!!!)
Its our fault golf course was closed as it was under 4ft of snow..

Then you have private gardens.. They expect you to cut every blade of grass with nail clippers.. "oh you missed a bit".. Feck off

kjl · 19-04-2015 4:06am

My job is pretty stress free.

I am a software consultant, which means I write custom software for businesses. My company sources all my projects so no stress there, we bill by the day but have certain drop phases. At the start of most project I have very little to do, a business consultant will talk the clients thought the project and I will get maybe 4 emails about with questions if x is possible. The business consultant have a basic understanding of what's possible and writes a full spec for the developers (me). Then we go into build phase. Non technical people don't have a clue how long it takes to write something, So a good day would be maybe 100 lines of code, a lot of libraries can be reused so it's not like you are writing from scratch, you are basically writing the flow of which libraries moves to which library.

I work from home on mondays and fridays when I mainly do admin work which is like expenses and maybe 5 lines of what I did this week and filling out a time card.

The project last about 2 years and to be honest, I think if I did a solid 2 months I could get a project done in that time. The problem is the people you are building the system for are basically idiots, they never have their sh!t in gear and always wasting time on frivolous issues because it's something they understand. They almost need to see something done wrong before listening to how to do it correctly. I cost about €2000 a day but they don't seem to realise that my time is expensive to the company.

Plus sometime when there is an upcoming project, but they haven't finalised the deal, they keep consultants on hold, this is what's know as the bench. This is basically fully paid time at home "refining" your skills. You never get a call from work asking what your doing and all you have to do is fill in 5 lines about what you did this week which you can blag a bit and a time card, you might be asked to help out with a small problem, but you get praised for weeks about it if you do. One time I was asked to fix something, I changed 5 characters in the code and it was fixed, I was getting emails from everyone in the company thanking me. I was on the bench for 4 months one time, and 2 months another time.

The only down side to my job is traveling, but on the plus side, I get all my meals expensed, earn enough air miles and hotel points to take a 2 week vacation anywhere in the world every year, get my phone paid for which has unlimited data, calls and text anywhere in the world, get my internet at home paid for because I need a reliable connection at home and the cherry on top of all this is I get paid very well, get great bonuses and I barely spend any money and end up saving about 20-30 grand a year.

19-04-2015 6:54am

KJL Do you need an apprentice?

mikemac1 · 19-04-2015 7:16am

kjl wrote: »

I cost about €2000 a day

Surely you have an extra zero there Chief!

Geniass · 19-04-2015 7:34am

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=

mikemac1 wrote: »

Surely you have an extra zero there Chief!

Or the only saving 20/30 k pa doesn't make sense.

Window cleaning ftw.

mikeymouse · 19-04-2015 7:46am

jester77 wrote: »

Surely the OP has a job by now?? How is the stress?

From his recent posts on other threads here, it look like it has not
turned out too good for Jimmy.
I really hope he can get it together.

Mister Vain · 19-04-2015 7:50am

You could try this. http://tinyurl.com/mvuos7x

ardmacha · 19-04-2015 8:15am

Mattress tester.

Phil Mitchell · 19-04-2015 8:19am

A barman for one of those poolside bars. Preferably in the carribbean

Kopparberg Strawberry and Lime · 19-04-2015 8:22am

Garda

can't get stressed strolling around most of the day

amdublin · 19-04-2015 8:24am

Call Me Jimmy wrote: »

Psychologist: Requires another 4 years at least at college but once ye start getting clients, ye just have to try help them, again nobody really puttin pressure on you for deadlines etc.
(No.)

I could be wrong but I think there absolutely is a pressure to manage your case load to try help someone in a reasonable period and move on to helping your next clients. People do not (and should not I think) stay in therapy forever.

Unless you are self employed I guess but I think at some point you will run out of things to say to clients, and them to you, if you don't move them on.

Darkglasses · 19-04-2015 8:29am

College librarian. No emergencies in a library.

harry Bailey esq · 19-04-2015 8:55am

The pub spy in the Sunday world has a pretty cushy gig...

mikemac1 · 19-04-2015 8:57am

Director of the lotto

Brainstorming up ideas to sell tickets and sipping champagne with winners

Saralee4 · 19-04-2015 9:03am

A fixer?

looksee · 19-04-2015 9:04am

amdublin wrote: »

I could be wrong but I think there absolutely is a pressure to manage your case load to try help someone in a reasonable period and move on to helping your next clients. People do not (and should not I think) stay in therapy forever.

Unless you are self employed I guess but I think at some point you will run out of things to say to clients, and them to you, if you don't move them on.

Amdublin, you are not doing this right

amdublin · 19-04-2015 9:07am

looksee wrote: »

Amdublin, you are not doing this right

oceanman · 19-04-2015 9:46am

stick with the grass cutting, out in the fresh air in the summer. I do it for about seven months of the year and put my feet up for the rest...happy days

amdublin · 19-04-2015 10:15am

Think it was Don't tell the Bride tv show or something and this fella worked in a company with his brother and his dad. They go out in a team and wash house windows. Three of them, job done in 10 minutes and on to the next house. cushty number!

Dirty Dingus McGee · 19-04-2015 10:15am

I worked at a weighbridge for a summer.There were at most 10 or 12 trucks that had to be weighed each day and the rest of the days was spent reading the paper and listening to the radio.

Best job I ever had and it paid quite well also and I was based in a nice open area where I could always go for a walk during the day.

Capt'n Midnight · 19-04-2015 10:21am

dubscottie wrote: »

Greenkeeper by trade.. Have to get the grass to grow before you can cut it.

*The furrow left by the fleeing gargoyles caused the University's head gardener to bite through his rake and let to the famous quotation: 'You mows it and you rolls it for five hundred years and then a bunch of bastards walks across it'

UCDVet · 19-04-2015 10:26am

Honestly, it's not the job. It's how you approach it.

Flipping burgers *can* be very stressful. First, you're dealing with high temperatures, you'll be tired, rushed, busy, and not only will you make a mistake, you'll get burned. Literally. Ask anyone who works in a kitchen and they'll show you their scars.

Be a cashier at McDonald's and you end up with a line going out the door....people in line are already annoyed, then you've got four orders you need to bag, drinks to fill, and then the woman ordering wants something from the menu you didn't even realize McDonald's sold, and she wants it special order - and you have no idea how to punch it into the damn register....stressful?

Only if you let it be.

Odds are you're a perfectly average person. That means you'll be a perfectly average fry cook or burger flipper or cashier. How fast you can do those things will be a simple function of how much training and practice you have. As soon as you accept that, that you're just a cog in the machine of business.....the stress disappears.

You can only make X burgers at a time. So that's what you do. Relax. If there is a line of people waiting for burgers, realize it's not your fault. You're doing your job. It's the owner of the restaurant/the manager of the restaurants job to train you. It's their job to make sure there is enough staff. It's their job to make sure the ordering system is easy to understand. Don't stress yourself out for *their* shortcomings. Flip the burgers the same as always.

A lot of people are very rich because they let other people assume ownership of their problems. A lot of people, they get stressed, they get angry, but they work harder (or longer), and who does it benefit? Not them. You won't get a bonus for flipping 25% more burgers today. But the guy or gal running the chain of restaurants, they're going to see an awful lot of money if they can reduce employee costs by 25% just by having fewer staff working, so that they feel stressed and push themselves harder.

This applies for all jobs that are hourly or salaried.

The only time you should feel stressed is when you're running your own business or working on commission/tips.

Lux23 · 19-04-2015 12:07pm

TV reviewer.

swimming in a sea · 19-04-2015 1:10pm

Librarian

Mint Aero · 19-04-2015 3:48pm

Any makey uppy job like IT, web developer, software etc.

Dozer Dave · 19-04-2015 3:50pm

A funeral directer.

Joe prim · 19-04-2015 4:13pm

upstairs for coffee wrote: »

What was it like?

See the Night Porter with Dirk Bogarde, very hard job having the oul' sexytime with Charlotte Rampling, must be exhausting!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDG7Ytkj_a4

corner of hells · 19-04-2015 4:27pm

Lift engineer , it can be a bit up and down

Procasinator · 19-04-2015 4:56pm

mikemac1 wrote: »

Surely you have an extra zero there Chief!

Probably safe to assume that is how much the client company pays his employer, not his personal take-home salary.

kjl · 19-04-2015 9:28pm

mikemac1 wrote: »

Surely you have an extra zero there Chief!

I don't get €2000, I get about €300 a day, my company gets the rest.

swimming in a sea · 20-04-2015 11:47am

kjl wrote: »

My job is pretty stress free.

I am a software consultant, which means I write custom software for businesses. My company sources all my projects so no stress there, we bill by the day but have certain drop phases. At the start of most project I have very little to do, a business consultant will talk the clients thought the project and I will get maybe 4 emails about with questions if x is possible. The business consultant have a basic understanding of what's possible and writes a full spec for the developers (me). Then we go into build phase. Non technical people don't have a clue how long it takes to write something, So a good day would be maybe 100 lines of code, a lot of libraries can be reused so it's not like you are writing from scratch, you are basically writing the flow of which libraries moves to which library.

I work from home on mondays and fridays when I mainly do admin work which is like expenses and maybe 5 lines of what I did this week and filling out a time card.

The project last about 2 years and to be honest, I think if I did a solid 2 months I could get a project done in that time. The problem is the people you are building the system for are basically idiots, they never have their sh!t in gear and always wasting time on frivolous issues because it's something they understand. They almost need to see something done wrong before listening to how to do it correctly. I cost about €2000 a day but they don't seem to realise that my time is expensive to the company.

Plus sometime when there is an upcoming project, but they haven't finalised the deal, they keep consultants on hold, this is what's know as the bench. This is basically fully paid time at home "refining" your skills. You never get a call from work asking what your doing and all you have to do is fill in 5 lines about what you did this week which you can blag a bit and a time card, you might be asked to help out with a small problem, but you get praised for weeks about it if you do. One time I was asked to fix something, I changed 5 characters in the code and it was fixed, I was getting emails from everyone in the company thanking me. I was on the bench for 4 months one time, and 2 months another time.

The only down side to my job is traveling, but on the plus side, I get all my meals expensed, earn enough air miles and hotel points to take a 2 week vacation anywhere in the world every year, get my phone paid for which has unlimited data, calls and text anywhere in the world, get my internet at home paid for because I need a reliable connection at home and the cherry on top of all this is I get paid very well, get great bonuses and I barely spend any money and end up saving about 20-30 grand a year.

It sounds to me like you might be bored, a handy job is great for a while but it makes you lazy.
Hey but thanks for the tip on SW Developers, I'm going to really push the guy working on my project now:D

The least stressful job...

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