How to Lie like a Lenihan

How to Lie like a Lenihan


Even if it’s a howler of a lie – you must deliver it with great gravitas and solemnity. That way people will believe you more.

Feign shock and indigence at the interviewer’s question – pull a face of utter shock that the interviewer had the audacity to ask such a ridiculous question in the first place.

Be sure to make grandiose promises, like you were on the side of the people and not the banks. Say you will “go to the ends-of-the-earth” to get bankers loans repaid and then just hope the idiots that are the Irish people will forget about it. Even though you don’t have a “strategy for growth” drop this term into every interview you do, it just sounds optimistic and good.


Use third parties as references to back up your actions and plans. (But as no credible third parties have actually supported your ideas and plans in the first place) you have to quote them selectively and then kind of contort and twist the facts as to make it seem like they support you.


If really stuck, bring on one of the faceless mandarins from the Department of Finance to quote some facts and figures. But, in hindsight, the last time a mandarin that was wheeled out, he f~”ked up big time when he could not even be bothered to remember key figures such as interest rates on Irish government loans. Therefore, remember not to wheel out Kevin Cardiff again.


And if really really stuck during and interview blame Lehman Brothers bank for the collapse of the Irish economy. If that does not work just blame Greece and if that does not work just talk about how exports are going up or how government expenditure exceeds government receipts.


Always dodge live television interviews, especially with the likes of Vincent Brown who Rothweiler-with-a-Rabbit like will not let you off easily, unlike the folks over in RTE. Instead, send a back bencher or a junior minister over to Uncle Vinnie and let them get a mauling instead.





Feel free to add you own.