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If you could be any animal

  • 28-05-2013 3:02pm
    #1
    lahalane
    Closed Accounts Posts: 954 ✭✭✭lahalane


    If you were told that you could no longer be a human being and that you were going to start life again but as an animal of your choosing, what would you choose?

    You can be any type of creature, bird, fish, insect, animal, etc as long as it is not extinct.

    You wouldn't remember being a human. If you picked a sparrow, you wouldn't be repulsed by eating worms. You would take on all instincts of that animal.

    I'd be a spider monkey. Those little dudes kick ass. I'm basing this assumption from films like Aladdin...


«1

Comments

  • #2
    --Kaiser--
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,461 ✭✭✭--Kaiser--


    Some apex predator or other, Bengal Tiger, Harpy Eagle, Arctic Wolf etc...


  • #3
    Gosub
    Closed Accounts Posts: 874 ✭✭✭Gosub


    Got to be a cat. It's the whole 'feed me and fuck off' attitude they get away with. :D


  • #4
    Ficheall
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,034 ✭✭✭Ficheall


    Bonobo.


  • #5
    The Backwards Man
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    I'd be a Great Tit.

    For obvious reasons.


  • #6
    Iano_128
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 412 ✭✭Iano_128


    Mantis Shrimp :)

    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/mantis_shrimp

    (SFW)


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  • #7
    Agricola
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,547 ✭✭✭Agricola


    Gosub wrote: »
    Got to be a cat. It's the whole 'feed me and fuck off' attitude they get away with. :D

    I agree. You'd get to pretend to be a wild predator during the day without having to worry about actually needing to kill to eat. Then just lounge around the house at night after a massive feed. No risk of going extinct either!


  • #8
    Mr Benevolent
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,456 ✭✭✭✭Mr Benevolent


    **** Eagle.


  • #9
    Shenshen
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,453 ✭✭✭Shenshen


    I would have said cat as well, but I've seen what hard and miserable lives some of them live in Ireland.... no.

    I think I'd be happy as a brown bear. Good variety of foods, beautiful habitats...
    And I like the notion of not only getting to sleep for half the year but losing half your body weight in the process. Win-win.


  • #10
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Elephant and my name would be heffalump and I could shower with my own truck


  • #11
    CardBordWindow
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,198 ✭✭✭CardBordWindow


    Iano_128 wrote: »
    Mantis Shrimp :)

    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/mantis_shrimp

    (SFW)
    I was going to say penguin, but now I wanna be a Mantis Shrimp too!


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  • #12
    frank reynolds
    Closed Accounts Posts: 404 ✭✭frank reynolds


    Definitely a Lion. they're such stoners!


  • #13
    iDave
    Registered Users Posts: 3,750 ✭✭✭iDave


    sloth


  • #14
    Tara Handsome Domino
    Posts: 0 CMod ✭✭✭✭ Tara Handsome Domino


    Definitely a bear


    No wait...


  • #15
    Zombienosh
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,911 ✭✭✭Zombienosh


    honey badger, cos i just dont give a ****.


  • #16
    biko
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 81,220 ✭✭✭✭biko


    Koala, hanging about being cuddly and eating leaves that makes me stoned.


  • #17
    The Princess Bride
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,608 ✭✭✭✭The Princess Bride


    A seahorse- I'd get to have all of the sex I'd want,and the male would have to endure labour and giving birth!
    :)


  • #18
    mojesius
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,362 ✭✭✭mojesius


    Probably a killer whale or a dolphin. But I'd have to live somewhere warm like the Caribbean or off the west coast of America. No arctic ocean/west coast of Ireland nonsense for me!


  • #19
    Franticfrank
    Registered Users Posts: 260 ✭✭Franticfrank


    Butterfly...because nobody suspects the butterfly


  • #20
    Ficheall
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,034 ✭✭✭Ficheall


    biko wrote: »
    Koala, hanging about being cuddly and eating leaves that makes me stoned.
    Chlamydia, though...


  • #21
    Duggy747
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,295 ✭✭✭✭Duggy747


    A Platypus.

    At least that way people will still say "What the fùck are you supposed to be!?!"


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  • #22
    IK09
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,055 ✭✭✭IK09


    ManBearPig


  • #23
    Mr.Prodston
    Registered Users Posts: 16,305 ✭✭✭✭Mr.Prodston


    It's gotta be a Tortoise. Chilling by a tropical beach for like 100 years and no worries about where you'll live. And the turtleneck look will always be fashionable!


  • #24
    WoollyRedHat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,462 ✭✭✭✭WoollyRedHat


    Either some kind of bird, because I'd be able to fly most likely far away distances, or a shark so I can take the piss and have the beach all for myself, while having a rockin bod.


  • #25
    stretchdoe
    Registered Users Posts: 546 ✭✭✭stretchdoe


    http://zankrank.com/u/112751eb-a09a-4be2-afbb-985ccf7b8794.jpg


  • #26
    Mysteriouschic
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,391 ✭✭✭Mysteriouschic


    Dolphin because you'd get to live in the sea :) I love swimming and being in the water.


  • #27
    WoollyRedHat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,462 ✭✭✭✭WoollyRedHat


    Mysteriouschic wrote: »
    Dolphin because you'd get to live in the sea :) I love swimming and being in the water.

    I was thinking Dolphin too.. they always seem so happy
    arf arf


  • #28
    herisson
    Closed Accounts Posts: 15,676 ✭✭✭✭herisson


    a hedgehog because hedgehogs are pretty cool....or a cat.


  • #29
    cd07
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 466 ✭✭cd07


    Id be a Goshawk seriously cool bird!


  • #30
    The Backwards Man
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    Pixie-Fairy wrote: »
    a hedgehog because hedgehogs are pretty cool....or a cat.
    The best of both worlds, a cathog


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  • #31
    Karl Stein
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,689 ✭✭✭Karl Stein


    A Bluebottle Fly.

    Cause I'd puke all over your food.


  • #32
    helimachoptor
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators Posts: 21,666 Mod ✭✭✭✭helimachoptor


    Hippo


  • #33
    Topper Harley
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,698 ✭✭✭Topper Harley


    I'd have to be a dog. I'd be so happy and excited all the time.

    And eternally optimistic: "Is that sandwich for me? When are you going to give me that sandwich? Why are you eating my sandwich? I'll just sit here and stare at you until you're ready to give it to me. Oh look, a ball, YES!...... DOORBELL. There's someone at the door, there's someone at the door,there's someone at the door..."...etc. and no other worries at all. Oh, to be a dog. :o


  • #34
    Capt'n Midnight
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 92,544 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Franticfrank wrote: »
    Butterfly...because nobody suspects the butterfly
    http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/die-bian-the-butterfly-murders/ "Within the walls of Shum Castle, a flock of butterflies seems to have acquired a taste for blood"


  • #35
    pragmatic1
    Registered Users Posts: 5,573 ✭✭✭pragmatic1


    Silverback gorilla. Peaceful but if I wanted to I could pluck your arms off like chicken wings.


  • #36
    ITS_A_BADGER
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,232 ✭✭✭ITS_A_BADGER


    <


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  • #37
    ToddyDoody
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,417 ✭✭✭ToddyDoody


    A stink beetle.


  • #38
    Tony EH
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,560 ✭✭✭✭Tony EH


    IK09 wrote: »
    ManBearPig

    OP said "not extinct".


  • #39
    Havermeyer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,041 ✭✭✭Havermeyer


    A honey badger.

    Nature's badass. :D

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg


  • #40
    Gorilla Rising
    Closed Accounts Posts: 381 ✭✭Gorilla Rising


    A gorilla.

    I'd have incredible upper body strength and agility. Also, I get to chill out and play and swing from trees when I'm a grown up too!

    Plus, my gorilla childhood would be much like my human one.


  • #41
    Topper Harley
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,698 ✭✭✭Topper Harley


    Gorilla Rising wrote: »
    Plus, my gorilla childhood would be much like my human one.

    And you'd be better looking too. :p


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  • #42
    Gorilla Rising
    Closed Accounts Posts: 381 ✭✭Gorilla Rising


    Topper Harley wrote: »
    And you'd be better looking too. :p

    And less hairy!


  • #43
    Topper Harley
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,698 ✭✭✭Topper Harley


    Havermeyer wrote: »
    A honey badger.

    Nature's badass. :D

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=4r7wHMg5Yjg

    That narrator sounds like a cross between a camp Pauly Shore and Mr/Ms Garrison. Good all the same. I love how be gets bitten by the snake, kills the snake, goes into a coma from the snake bite, wakes up after a while and just continues eating the snake. That's the very definition of badass. :cool:


  • #44
    TouchingVirus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,584 ✭✭✭TouchingVirus


    Topper Harley wrote: »
    I'd have to be a dog. I'd be so happy and excited all the time.

    And eternally optimistic: "Is that sandwich for me? When are you going to give me that sandwich? Why are you eating my sandwich? I'll just sit here and stare at you until you're ready to give it to me. Oh look, a ball, YES!...... DOORBELL. There's someone at the door, there's someone at the door,there's someone at the door..."...etc. and no other worries at all. Oh, to be a dog. :o

    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/dog_paradox

    I would be a Spinosaurus, the largest (known) land-based apex predator ever. I would go Jurassic Park on entire cities, it would be amazing


  • #45
    dodderangler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,204 ✭✭✭dodderangler


    A horse sized duck


  • #46
    Festy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,425 ✭✭✭Festy


    Cat


  • #47
    dodderangler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,204 ✭✭✭dodderangler


    TouchingVirus wrote: »
    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/dog_paradox

    I would be a Spinosaurus, the largest (known) land-based apex predator ever. I would go Jurassic Park on entire cities, it would be amazing

    Op said it has to not be extinct
    But if I was gonna be an extinct animal I'd be this bad ass
    Haast's eagle - largest bird of prey to ever have existed
    http://www.badassoftheweek.com/haasteagle.html


  • #48
    Capt'n Midnight
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 92,544 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Franticfrank wrote: »
    Butterfly...because nobody suspects the butterfly

    http://www.explosm.net/db/files/Comics/Kris/show.png


  • #49
    Crooked Jack
    Registered Users Posts: 5,678 ✭✭✭Crooked Jack


    A gremlin, from Gremlins.
    I'd love to be one of those little maniacs.


  • #50
    dodderangler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,204 ✭✭✭dodderangler


    Speaking of maniacs what were the animanics? Dogs or something?


  • #51
    Stinicker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 7,102 ✭✭✭Stinicker


    Spider Pig


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