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Arguing with Parents

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  • 29-02-2008 9:13pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I am always arguing with my parents. We argue about very petty everyday things like forgetting phone messages. Leaving fridge door open. Making noise at night etc. If i do any of these things they come down on me like a ton of bricks and often blow these things out of propertion. They go on and on. However when the situation is reversed and they do any of these things and i point out it to them they brush and 'thats different' or say i am picking on them. i cant seem to win. i would move out but dont really have many friends and would get lonely.


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    #2
    BaZmO*
    Registered Users Posts: 18,625 ✭✭✭✭BaZmO*


    How old are you?


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    #3
    crawford
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4 ✭crawford


    too old to be living with parents


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    #4
    BaZmO*
    Registered Users Posts: 18,625 ✭✭✭✭BaZmO*


    crawford wrote: »
    too old to be living with parents
    Well there you go. No need for any advise so, you already know the solution to your problem


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    #5
    crawford
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4 ✭crawford


    i went through a bad patch when i was younger would have needed counselling but they never seemed to notice and/or didnt do anything. i grew up with a lot of problems


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    #6
    squibs
    Closed Accounts Posts: 975 ✭✭✭squibs


    If you leave the fridge door open, do you apologise? Do you make a special effort to not do it again? Or is it always a fight? Be honest.

    I think most people redefine their boundaries with their parents as they hit adulthood.

    I would be annoyed if somebody did the things you talk about - why not try to be a bit more conscientous, or failing that find your own place? While you live with them you live by their rules, and they have probably earned some "me time" which will help them to chill out and not sweat the small stuff.


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    #7
    crawford
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4 ✭crawford


    squibs wrote: »
    If you leave the fridge door open, do you apologise? Do you make a special effort to not do it again? Or is it always a fight? Be honest.

    if i do something small i get the blame whereas iwhenn the situation is reversed i still get the blame. i feel as if i cant win. also they both argue with each other


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    #8
    BaZmO*
    Registered Users Posts: 18,625 ✭✭✭✭BaZmO*


    Seriously dude, move out. Their home, their rules. Rightly or wrongly you're in a lose/lose situation.


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    #9
    gcgirl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,044 ✭✭✭gcgirl


    Being a parent and being a daughter i have never had a petty argument with my mum/nan as for my kids i am trying to get my 7 year old daughter to respect her bedroom and look after it like keeping it clean ect! i would not get in to words over the fridge door being open now thats being petty as for the making noise do you have wooding floors ! do your parents get on that much?


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    #10
    crawford
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4 ✭crawford


    most conversations between us is arguing. at one time it would have been 90%. they have actually chilled a bit


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    #11
    mysterious
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,133 ✭✭✭mysterious


    crawford wrote: »
    most conversations between us is arguing. at one time it would have been 90%. they have actually chilled a bit



    I've found a trick with really argumentive people is, is that they need to fuel their rage, if you stop giving it they run out of it.

    If you still feel the need to make a point (sometimes impossible in such cases) always always be calm, even if they effing and blinding. They will get the message eventually.

    But my Advice would be to

    Move out of home at least for a while, to sort your head out and get to know yourself better. You can't living at home, for the time being. Friends will come eventually, once you break away from the old patterns.

    Secondly you can't change them, only yourself. So get out and enjoy.


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