Why did your band fall apart?

I had a band when I was in school, a few friends of mine came together and tried really hard. But after a while Jimmy quit and then Jodie got married. I probably should have known we'd never get far

Duke Leonal Felmet wrote: »

In my opinion, it is the responsibility of the composer to communicate these issues to other members. They can't hears your 'vision' of the song, only you can. So just asking them to try something different and having the will to keep the song on course is required.

That said, band members can also play things that never would think of, and can give the song a character that you never considered. Again, communication and a willingness to bend is also required.

It's tough, but a fine balance of both these options must be found. But with a difficult personality in the band? I don't know how that is done...

I think he was saying moreso that other band members weren't putting in the effort into improving their parts of the song. An "it'll do" type of attitude when "can I improve this?" is what he was looking for. People more in love with the idea of being in a band than actually being in a band and making it work.

Folmhaim wrote: »

Regarding the thing about people with egos, I certainly wouldn't agree that being in a band with a bunch of people you get along with is automatically a good idea. When you're in a band with a bunch of your mates, I think what tends to happen is that people tend to start worrying about hurting other people's feelings, and the one thing you don't want in a band is to be surrounded by a bunch of yes-men - if you've written a bad song, you need someone to tell you that it's a bad song, not tell you it's a good song so your feelings don't get hurt. The last bad I was in split up partly cos of this, in that the singer and the drummer were really good mates and whenever the singer wrote a song the drummer would tell him it was really good and so on, even if it wasn't. I'm not sure if the drummer in question was even aware of doing this, but I imagine if the two of them hadn't been good mates then he would've been prepared to give the singer more honest feedback. So I think it's either a good idea not to be in a band with a bunch of your mates, or if you are, then to make sure your mates can keep the personal relationship and the band relationship completely separate.

Some good points made here. I think all members of a band should have the maturity to accept constructive musical criticism. IMO you are not being a good mate if you say one thing but think something else. You are all supposed to be part of a team, working together for the common good. Like you say, the band relationship can and should be left behind in the rehearsal room after practice. Sounds great in theory, but is not always the case unfortunately.

Ego and ego.
2 biggest reasons imo for the breakup my past bands.
Singer, who in fairness actually wrote very good rock/pop songs, which did get national airplay, started to believe what media said about us that bit too early.:( He tended to listen to his "new friends", bloody clingons, rather than the growing number of arguments in rehearsals. We had started out with a similar goal, were on the road to acheiving it, but then the Kiss of Death. "The Next U2" Arrrggghhhh. Back in the 90's anyway this meant, once it was written about you, goodnight Vienna/Slan Leat/Auf Wiedersehen/Bien Nuit.......

On the issue of mates with other members, it helps if you can tolerate them but imho you dont need them to be "mates". We treated our band as a business, just like any job, and no one likes all their workmates but for the purpose of gaining a wage, they show respect and tolerance to the people they spend most of their day with.....
We had the occasional pint after a gig and that was it. NEVER did we meet up in town outside of rehearsal/gig's and it worked, to the relative level that we acheived. My two cents.....

First band:

Different tastes, different aspirations. We had been playing together for about 7 years, had been signed and a few years later dropped from a label so band had basically run its course and different members wanted to move onto different things at that stage.

Second Band:

Alot of enthusiasm when it suited some members but absolutely no commitment or effort for the mostpart. One in particular would go months without even picking up his instrument yet expect to be gig ready after one practice. Eventually I got sick of it and left.

Current band is the absolute opposite thankfully. Only been playing with them a few months but everyone seems to be constantly trying to get better even though they are all solid musicians already. Everyone works on their parts for new songs at home which i think is very important to keep interest up. If you come to practice each week and have to claw through a new song slowly over a month or so to get it sounding anywhere near decent it becomes a nightmare. If you come to practice a week after starting a new song and everybody has worked on their parts and you notice an instant increase in the songs quality it makes you feel alot better and keeps you interested. As for working with someone you find difficult, it really depends on the circumstances. Ive been in bands with people i didnt get on with/other members didnt get along etc as we were simply different people but while it could be difficult, we just got on with it. Things like that only become a barrier if you make it one. Obviously if your only playing for fun and not as a career, you want to get on with everyone but if your playing to make a career out of it, just be professional and put up with eachother. If its a case that you despise another member then its obviously different. In most bands there is some sort of friction at some stage but make sure the communication lines in the band are open and discuss any problems people have before they become a major thing.

PS. Bassplayer also and have also had big problems finding other committed members. Before i started with the current band I must have sent out about 20 PMs and got maybe 3-4 replies within a fortnight of sending, another 3-4 after about a month or so. Personally see it as a major warning sign as if it takes that long to reply, you can imagine how disorganised the band probably is. :rolleyes:

Colinboy wrote: »

I have got a new band together now and hopefully will be gigging in the new year but found out a few months ago that the 3 lads from the last band have a band up and running now but got anew guitarist and bass player to replace us so we essentially got shafted!!!

[Tony] Wilson was a great catalyst, a champion bull****ter and a pretty terrible businessman - all thoroughly commendable qualities. He was also a dream interview, and very funny on the rare occasions I spoke to him. “Don’t print this,” he once told me, “but all musicians are c*nts.”

- Stephen Dalton (Uncut Magazine)

It was more and more like a chore towards the end. I was doing most of the work, the drummer had started playing with another band and our rhythm guitarist would rarely make it to practice. As a result, our live performances begun to suffer and the whole thing just wasn't fun anymore.

Best advice I can give is to find like-minded musicians with a high work ethic.