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Engagement Ring

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  • 04-12-2014 12:58am
    #1
    HipFlask
    Registered Users Posts: 29 ✭


    Hi guys,

    I am hoping to pop the questions very soon. Couldn't be more excited but want to make sure I get the perfect ring, she truly deserves it.

    My partner has a traditional yet quirky style and price, bling, size won't matter in the slightest to her (it would almost be easier if it did :)) so I know it will be difficult to get it just right.

    So I want some advice, should I do my best in picking one and hope for the best or pick out a token ring and then take her to pick her own? Do jewellers exchange rings if purchased and not liked?

    I must admit I love the thought of offering on bended knee a fully fledged engagement ring at the moment of proposing.

    Looking forward to any suggestions. Thanks guys!

    P


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    #2
    Stheno
    Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 51,687 Mod ✭✭✭✭Stheno


    I'm going to buy my engagement ring, I'm on my second potential marriage, and if/when i happens, I know the exact ring I want, and it's expensive (well to me) and I don't expect my OH to buy it.

    However, I'd love him to propose, and as he has recently discovered a local jeweller in the last year whose stuff I love, I'd want him to propse with a token and then off we go to order my ring (it's a very specific ring, custom made, that can only be ordered from one place in Ireland)

    If she is as fussy as me, go with a token, and make an occasion of getting the "real ring"

    For me the proposal is seperate from the ring, the proposal is asking you to spend your life with someone, the ring is just a token of that, which may sound contradictory, but it is.

    It's like the wedding being looking forward to a long life together :)

    best of luck :)


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    #3
    HipFlask
    Registered Users Posts: 29 ✭HipFlask


    Stheno wrote: »
    I'm going to buy my engagement ring, I'm on my second potential marriage, and if/when i happens, I know the exact ring I want, and it's expensive (well to me) and I don't expect my OH to buy it.

    However, I'd love him to propose, and as he has recently discovered a local jeweller in the last year whose stuff I love, I'd want him to propse with a token and then off we go to order my ring (it's a very specific ring, custom made, that can only be ordered from one place in Ireland)

    If she is as fussy as me, go with a token, and make an occasion of getting the "real ring"

    For me the proposal is seperate from the ring, the proposal is asking you to spend your life with someone, the ring is just a token of that, which may sound contradictory, but it is.

    It's like the wedding being looking forward to a long life together :)

    best of luck :)

    Thanks ... Offers some great direction. I don't think she is fussy as you say you are :) but your points make absolute sense. It's the commitment and act of proposing that matters.

    How do you think a humourous token ring would generally go down? Add a bit of fun or just make it a bit too much of a mockery?


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    #4
    pooch90
    Registered Users Posts: 2,371 ✭✭✭pooch90


    My OH got a cubic zirconia solitaire ring in the jewellers as a token, cost €100, maybe a bit much for a token ring but I wear it on my other hand sometimes. Lots of people thought it was real for the few weeks it took to get my ring made.
    Argos would have something similar.
    Lots of jewellers have ads saying they will exchange the ring if the lady doesn't like it. From the sounds of it, that may be your best option.


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    #5
    Callanutd
    Registered Users Posts: 213 ✭✭Callanutd


    I popped the question in Sept. used a €20 ring from M&S. I knew she would want to pick the ring out herself but I didnt realise how enjoyable it would be shopping for it the next day. After your house and car prob one of the biggest single expenses you will purchase so its nice to know that its right for her and like I said you can have a really fun day shopping for it.


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    #6
    HipFlask
    Registered Users Posts: 29 ✭HipFlask


    It's a big swaying point to make an event out of picking the ring together alright. I'm kind of leaning that direction at the moment. And a token ring would be nice as an extra reminder of the proposal and all that afterwards as mentioned above.

    TThere is more to this proposal lark than I realised :)

    Thanks for the help and pointers guys!


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    #7
    polydactyl
    Registered Users Posts: 831 ✭✭✭polydactyl


    Husband bought a lovely token ring for popping the question as he knew I didn't want a solitaire and as his dad said to him when he told him he was going to propose "the only advice I will give you son is let her pick the ring. She has to wear it for the rest of her life not you and you want her to look at it and love it and associate that love with you every time she sees it not think, it's nice but could do better :) "

    Also we had a fab day picking out the ring. Wandering up and down Gafton street drinking Champagne in every shop, it was great Craic and a fab memory.


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    #8
    HelgaWard
    Registered Users Posts: 568 ✭✭✭HelgaWard


    My husband had the engagement ring picked when he proposed. I was very surprised. I like it, but would have preferred to pick my own. Think the token ring option is a good one, then go shopping together.
    Best of luck!


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    #9
    Milly33
    Registered Users Posts: 8,638 ✭✭✭Milly33


    Ah I had a hole response tyed out and I lost it..

    anywho congrats to you for putting so much though into..

    Have you tried being sneaky and maybe dropping in a few questions here and there about things like this..I know himself was saying he was planning for a long time to propose so he used to suss me out, mostly during shows like don't tell the bride or things like that. Saying would you like "the" ring on the day or a token ring..

    To me I wanted "the" ring it meant so much that he had gone out and picked this ring just for me..That alone would have me weak... It meant more than anything really..But that's just me..

    he did say that the jeweller was very nice and he said to him if I waned to change anything I could that he would redesign the ring if I wanted or I could pick another.. Must say the jeweller though was not main stream as such, himself said he found a lot of the typical jewellery shops were very well not so nice.. best of luck with it


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    #10
    amdublin
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Arts Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 20,648 CMod ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    I think the €20 rings from m&s are the job for proposals if you want to use a token ring :-)


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    #11
    HipFlask
    Registered Users Posts: 29 ✭HipFlask


    Hi all,

    Thanks for all the replies... It seems most are leaning towards the token route. I haven't gone that way I must admit :)
    I have picked a ring I think she will love and the jeweller says they will change it no problem if she doesn't like it and they are a reputable jewellers so I have no fear here.
    They also will make any bespoke/design ring she might want so I think I am getting the best of both worlds in that if she loves it then I'm golden and if not I will make sure she knows that she can choose or design her own Ring.

    Thanks again guys and happy Christmas to you all :)


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    #12
    kkcatlou
    Registered Users Posts: 332 ✭✭kkcatlou


    Just to add the other perspective (and reassure you). It was really important to me that my husband proposed with the actual ring. Otherwise, it felt very commercial to me and less romantic....that's just me now. I was never one for rings and jewellery. I just knew I wanted something a bit different to the usual solitaire (that most girls who insist they need to pick their own end up going for!!) and got that word around to a few trusted friends, one of whom he went to for advice.

    I absolutely love my ring. I think I would have hated the stress of picking out one myself, and I loved that he had it on the day, and we could announce our engagement to everyone the next day showing off the ring without a caveat. I love that he went to the effort of getting it made for me, that he was nervous about whether I'd like it or not (in a good way), that he made the effort to think about what I'd like, do a bit of asking around, get it custom made. I think a €20 M&S ring (to me) would have dampened the specialness of the whole thing. Going shopping together would have made the whole thing feel like a shopping trip, a commercial transaction, and there would have been questions about how much the budget was, etc. The whole thing to me, would have made it all feel a lot less special.

    Anyway, best of luck with what you've chosen! to me, it sounds perfect, and I wish you all the best. Do be prepared that it probably won't fit and she'll have to get it resized, but hopefully that'll be the only complication!!


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    #13
    sparkey38
    Registered Users Posts: 11 ✭sparkey38


    I proposed with the ring.

    I kinda asked her a few weeks before (over a glass of wine) what she would like. I told her I was going shopping for 'something special which she would wear on her had for a long time' and asked if she would like to come along with me or should I go alone.

    She told me that I had good taste and that I should go alone. Then a day we were in shopping I brought her into a jewellery shop to have her finger sized. She knew it was going to happen, but didn't know when, but she knew I had the ring, and had it sized correctly.

    I told her she could change / alter / or return the ring. But to this day she insists that she loves it, and all the more because I picked it out.
    She said she would not have been comfortable coming shopping with me. So each to their own.

    Advice I would give is that if you are in a relationship where you are going to propose, I would imagine it wouldnt be a big shock to her that you are thinking about it and maybe quiz her (subtly ) about how she would like it to happen.


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