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The staggering price of weddings in this country.

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    #32
    clint_silver
    Registered Users Posts: 2,895 ✭✭✭clint_silver


    munchkin_utd wrote: »
    nope, I'm simply saying that the money a venue makes on drink is massive. The wastage just means they are making an even tidier profit from drink sales.

    But the point in general is that sales of drink are so lucrative in the first place that theres little excuse to ride you on the food cost on top of it.

    If there was no culture of drinking loads, and/or drink was cheap, then you'd understand the crazy cost of the food.
    But the venues want to make insane cash on the food AND the drink.
    Mad stuff.

    Anyhow, despite the pair of us being irish and having a wedding in Ireland could be considered an option, we got married abroad.
    There was a number of factors, but the cost for a reception in Ireland with fairly mediocre food was definitely one of the main reasons.

    what wastage? If someone doesnt finish their drink are you suggesting that the venue makes even more profit? That doesn't make sense.

    If venues make so much insane money, why are so many hotels in the country in receivership/nama/for sale?


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    #33
    wexie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,480 ✭✭✭wexie


    clint_silver wrote: »
    what wastage? If someone doesnt finish their drink are you suggesting that the venue makes even more profit? That doesn't make sense.

    [SARCASM] But don't they collect all the leftovers and save them for the punch for the next wedding? [/SARCASM]


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    #34
    munchkin_utd
    Registered Users Posts: 7,847 ✭✭✭munchkin_utd


    clint_silver wrote: »
    what wastage? If someone doesnt finish their drink are you suggesting that the venue makes even more profit? That doesn't make sense.

    If venues make so much insane money, why are so many hotels in the country in receivership/nama/for sale?
    Nama is a property related issue. Many hotels were drawn into it thanks to bigger residental and commercial property issues that the hotel owners were dragged down by.
    Maldron is now running many of the Nama hotels and is doing a great job, and from personal experience with some hotels they are now a MUCH better place to stay in than at the height of the boom.

    regarding wastage, that point is very simple - but maybe you arent a pint drinker so its an alien concept.
    If I have a half pint in front of me, then being a wedding and knowing half the people there someone buys me another, and before I move another person lands yet another pint in front of me, then I suddenly have 2 1/2 pints in front of me in various levels of coldness and freshness - which later in the evening when youre drinking slowly I'd never drink it before it goes flat or warm - so the first 1/2 pint, if not most of the second one, will not be drank.
    So for 3 pints bought, I'll drink 1 or 1 1/2 and dump the rest (and get a fresh one in an hour)
    So now the hotel has cash and profit for 3 pints, when I've only really wanted or needed the one


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    #35
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    wexie wrote: »
    But don't they collect all the leftovers and save them for the punch for the next wedding?

    I would imagine the Food Safety Authority would have them closed down pretty sharpish for practices like that.

    Ah whoops, scarcasm lol.


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    #36
    Pistachios & cream
    Registered Users Posts: 762 ✭✭✭Pistachios & cream


    munchkin_utd wrote: »
    So for 3 pints bought, I'll drink 1 or 1 1/2 and dump the rest (and get a fresh one in an hour)
    So now the hotel has cash and profit for 3 pints, when I've only really wanted or needed the one

    But this isn't the hotel's fault. Instead if someone wants to buy you a pint say no as you have one already. This is what i do if i don't want a drink at that moment i say no thanks. The hotel still has to pay the drink suppliers for the wasted drinks


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    #37
    wexie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,480 ✭✭✭wexie


    munchkin_utd wrote: »
    regarding wastage, that point is very simple - but maybe you arent a pint drinker so its an alien concept. If I have a half pint in front of me, then being a wedding and knowing half the people there someone buys me another, and before I move another person lands yet another pint in front of me, then I suddenly have 2 1/2 pints in front of me in various levels of coldness and freshness - which later in the evening when youre drinking slowly I'd never drink it before it goes flat or warm - so the first 1/2 pint, if not most of the second one, will not be drank. So for 3 pints bought, I'll drink 1 or 1 1/2 and dump the rest (and get a fresh one in an hour)So now the hotel has cash and profit for 3 pints, when I've only really wanted or needed the one

    1) that's in no way unique to either weddings or hotels
    2) the hotel isn't wasting the drink it's the patrons wasting it
    3) the hotel make no more money whether you drink it once it's sold or not.


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    #38
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    The prices will come down Op, if people stop paying.

    But, most people are like you - they will grumble, but still go for or be guilted into by family, the standard format of wedding and all that it entails and cough up the money for it. And vendors know this. They know people want the vintage car, the three bridesmaids, church music, DJ and all the trimmings.

    I know someone who had their wedding - outfits, sit down 3-course meal for 60 and a honeymoon all for €2,000. They didnt bother with a lot of trimmings and it was one of the nicest weddings I attended. Food was sublime.

    You dont have to follow the standard format and can do something really beautiful and unique for a lot less money.


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    #39
    munchkin_utd
    Registered Users Posts: 7,847 ✭✭✭munchkin_utd


    ahayes84 wrote: »
    But this isn't the hotel's fault. Instead if someone wants to buy you a pint say no as you have one already. This is what i do if i don't want a drink at that moment i say no thanks. The hotel still has to pay the drink suppliers for the wasted drinks
    a lot of folks missing the point here.
    What I'm simply pointing out is that they are doing well on having a room full of thirsty customers PLUS they have an added bonus that they then sell more drink than is needed or wanted due to the happy form of round buying uncles and the likes.

    So, essentially the drink side of the business at a wedding venue is a nice money spinner which means that they dont need to ride you on the cost of the actual meal.
    But still they do.


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    #40
    clint_silver
    Registered Users Posts: 2,895 ✭✭✭clint_silver


    munchkin_utd wrote: »
    Nama is a property related issue. Many hotels were drawn into it thanks to bigger residental and commercial property issues that the hotel owners were dragged down by.
    Maldron is now running many of the Nama hotels and is doing a great job, and from personal experience with some hotels they are now a MUCH better place to stay in than at the height of the boom.

    regarding wastage, that point is very simple - but maybe you arent a pint drinker so its an alien concept.
    If I have a half pint in front of me, then being a wedding and knowing half the people there someone buys me another, and before I move another person lands yet another pint in front of me, then I suddenly have 2 1/2 pints in front of me in various levels of coldness and freshness - which later in the evening when youre drinking slowly I'd never drink it before it goes flat or warm - so the first 1/2 pint, if not most of the second one, will not be drank.
    So for 3 pints bought, I'll drink 1 or 1 1/2 and dump the rest (and get a fresh one in an hour)
    So now the hotel has cash and profit for 3 pints, when I've only really wanted or needed the one


    I drink pints.
    Bars closing, d'ya want another pint?
    no.
    if someone doesnt understand that, the hotel is welcome to the tenner profit theyve made on the round of drinks he just bought.


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    #41
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    munchkin_utd wrote: »
    a lot of folks missing the point here.
    What I'm simply pointing out is that they are doing well on having a room full of thirsty customers PLUS they have an added bonus that they then sell more drink than is needed or wanted due to the happy form of round buying uncles and the likes.

    So, essentially the drink side of the business at a wedding venue is a nice money spinner which means that they dont need to ride you on the cost of the actual meal.
    But still they do.

    What is the profit margin on an average bar drink?


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    #42
    barneyrubble46
    Registered Users Posts: 80 ✭✭barneyrubble46


    church weddings are a total con and a total waste of time. Just go to a register office cheaper and the end result is the same. Then go have a big party somewhere totally cool. I did and I have been married over 27 years, my total budget was €450 and I had the time of my life.


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    #43
    sweetie
    Registered Users Posts: 9,791 ✭✭✭sweetie


    wexie wrote: »
    [SARCASM] But don't they collect all the leftovers and save them for the punch for the next wedding? [/SARCASM]

    i've heard they can put them back in the keg and send back to the brewery as a spoiled keg? When I worked in a bar many moons ago the owner would as us to keep the dead/abandoned pints for some reason and not tip them down the drain.


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    #44
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    sweetie wrote: »
    i've heard they can put them back in the keg and send back to the brewery as a spoiled keg? When I worked in a bar many moons ago the owner would as us to keep the dead/abandoned pints for some reason and not tip them down the drain.

    I know that a pub I worked in kept a track of what was in drip trays, but for stock taking purposes, but abandoned drinks got chucked down the sink.


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    #45
    Milly33
    Registered Users Posts: 8,638 ✭✭✭Milly33


    No I don't think they put them back in the keg. It is more to track waste from what I know anywho, to see how much of the keg went down the drain..

    The biggest burn I think is the whole wedding band. Heard someone mention they spent €3,000 again I just do not see why. Chatting to a few musicians at the weekend and they are all the same saying tis crazy what they are charging


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    #46
    pwurple
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,449 ✭✭✭✭pwurple


    barneyrubble46 wrote: »
    church weddings are a total con and a total waste of time. Just go to a register office cheaper and the end result is the same. Then go have a big party somewhere totally cool. I did and I have been married over 27 years, my total budget was €450 and I had the time of my life.

    The church REALLY isn't the expensive part of weddings. It's the 3k dress, the 5k honeymoon cruise, the 100 euro per person dinners, the rock of a ring, the 4 bridesmaids and groomsmen, and fleet of flowergirls/pageboys, the 2k wedding band that push it up into stupidland.

    We didn't spend a fortune either, we had a bbq with our friends and family in a nice house we had rented for the weekend. People seemed to have liked it, as four of the attendees did the exact same thing in the same venue over the following years.

    I love hotel weddings too though, it's so handy to be able to stay right there! Good hotels have it down to an art they run it so smoothly.

    I've been to a badly organised wedding (the place was new to the business and had lured couple in with special offer). It was like watching a car crash in action. The fire alarm was going on and off all night because of the candles on the tables, guests were evacuated into the rainy carpark 3 times. The bar pumps stopped working, they ran out of beer. It was a total and complete disaster.

    I wouldn't run down a place that can turn around a good wedding at all. They are big undertakings.


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    #47
    NeVeR
    Registered Users Posts: 5,325 ✭✭✭NeVeR


    I was at a wedding in the Springfield hotel in lucan,

    Very nice place ( I thought )

    Here is it's package.

    http://www.springfieldhotel.ie/cmsFiles/all_inclusive.pdf

    Here's it's site http://www.springfieldhotel.ie/wedding-packages.htm


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    #48
    clint_silver
    Registered Users Posts: 2,895 ✭✭✭clint_silver


    Milly33 wrote: »
    No I don't think they put them back in the keg. It is more to track waste from what I know anywho, to see how much of the keg went down the drain..

    The biggest burn I think is the whole wedding band. Heard someone mention they spent €3,000 again I just do not see why. Chatting to a few musicians at the weekend and they are all the same saying tis crazy what they are charging


    Did the couple say whether the 3k included any combination of church/pre-drinks/band/DJ?
    Was the 3k for a 3 piece band or a 10 piece with brass?
    was there travel involved?
    Was there agents fees involved?
    Are they an in-demand band where they have priced themselves accordingly with how much in-demand they are?
    Was it a high season date?

    If you seen an average band and seen a good band, you'd know the difference as to why 1 band charges more than the other.


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    #49
    Effects
    Registered Users Posts: 9,761 ✭✭✭Effects


    xpletiv wrote: »
    The church we are getting married in only does Saturday ceremonies so we have to have it on a Saturday.
    Pick a different church or else don't get married in a church. You probably aren't a proper Christian so the church is just for show.
    What I cant believe is the absolute greed of venues meaning a wedding costs MINIMUM 10000 euros.
    Make a choice to not have that kind of wedding if you can't afford it.
    Now, call me cynical, but are we in Ireland not still in recession!?
    No. The recession is over
    And most importantly, with the lovely new budget that just came out, new house buyers have to have 20% of their mortgage (thanks older generation!)
    Don't spend money on one day, spend it on your house deposit instead.


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    #50
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    pwurple wrote: »

    I wouldn't run down a place that can turn around a good wedding at all. They are big undertakings.

    Absolutely. I've worked them behind the scenes, as well as attending more than I can shake a stick at, and the venue that can do a quality wedding with their eyes closed is often worth the money. So much goes on behind the scenes that the experienced venues sort out without guests being any the wiser, where an inexperienced venue may be unprepared for a failed delivery of something or other.

    Having said that, new management/ changes is one thing to watch out for. I know two weddings, a year apart in the same venue had massive differences in service and quality. The first, the food was amazing. piping hot, lots of it, perfect service. Following year, the same venue, and our table, which was a family table, got served lukewarm meat, they forgot the veg, and gravy, offered potato to those who were still waiting for their plates, and didnt return. So obviously they changed some format and I'd say the top table were the only ones that got a decent hot meal. And both packages cost the same.


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    #51
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,905 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    Effects wrote: »
    Pick a different church or else don't get married in a church. You probably aren't a proper Christian so the church is just for show.
    Please don't make assumptions like this about the OP. You have no idea how religious or non religious they are.


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    #52
    pooch90
    Registered Users Posts: 2,371 ✭✭✭pooch90


    OP, Station House Kilmessan is a beautiful spot with lovely grounds for civil if you wanted a church alternative. Great staff, food, atmosphere. Very reasonable prices.Summer weekend minimum numbers are 100 and basic package starts at €55 for a weekend.

    RE band, ours cost over €2K for drinks reception, 4 piece band and DJ. To enjoy the entire day dancing your socks off was the best money spent in the whole wedding


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    #53
    Electric Sheep
    Registered Users Posts: 2,104 ✭✭✭Electric Sheep


    The whole cycle is driven by the wedding industry - a fool and his money are easily parted. Nobody needs a 2 or 3 day extravaganza of a wedding with multiple bridesmaids/groomsmen and whatever "unique" gimmick that is at every wedding that particular season.

    Elope. Save yourself the stress and expense of planning a wedding that will be over and done with, a dress you will never wear again, and a day that is really just like every other Irish wedding. Spend the money on a deposit for your new home - you will never regret it.


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    #54
    uck51js9zml2yt
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,268 ✭✭✭✭uck51js9zml2yt


    We got married in the carnegie court hotel in swords.
    Had the ceremony there with a solemniser.
    We had 66 for the meal and used the restaurant. The early bird gave us a choice of 5 dishes and 3 courses for €19 a head.
    People just ordered what they wanted and we had wine and soft drinks for those who wanted it.
    The tables were set out properly and everyone was happy. I think the bill came to about 1800.

    We know of numerous couples who have done the same since.

    The alternative was Turkey and ham or fish for 45 a head in the function room.
    We had a dj for the evening and food which went to waste as everyone was so full from dinner.


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    #55
    Markcheese
    Registered Users Posts: 8,431 ✭✭✭Markcheese


    If you've got the money and want the do , go for it ... If you think it's overpriced do it different ... A decent venue that's expensively kitted out,with loads of expensive staff is gonna cost ...
    My self and my wife married 5 and a half years ago and worked our arses off to do it on a budget (cos we didn't have loads) family and friends helped a lot.. I organized the cattering ( but I have that background) found a great venue and we fed, and watered 85 people at a total budget of 5 grand... And didn't scrimp ..
    It'd probably cost about 10 grand (including Boose for the night)if I hadn't pulled in friends to help organism and I got lucky with the venue (not a hotel) they did way more than I could have expected or even dreamed of ...

    Slava ukraini 🇺🇦



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    #56
    clint_silver
    Registered Users Posts: 2,895 ✭✭✭clint_silver


    Saoirse Rough Menu wrote: »
    We got married in the carnegie court hotel in swords.
    Had the ceremony there with a solemniser.
    We had 66 for the meal and used the restaurant. The early bird gave us a choice of 5 dishes and 3 courses for €19 a head.
    People just ordered what they wanted and we had wine and soft drinks for those who wanted it.
    The tables were set out properly and everyone was happy. I think the bill came to about 1800.

    We know of numerous couples who have done the same since.

    The alternative was Turkey and ham or fish for 45 a head in the function room.
    We had a dj for the evening and food which went to waste as everyone was so full from dinner.

    I cant resist. Why would you go to Turkey for ham or fish?

    Carnegie great spot for a wedding


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    #57
    uck51js9zml2yt
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,268 ✭✭✭✭uck51js9zml2yt


    clint_silver wrote: »
    I cant resist. Why would you go to Turkey for ham or fish?

    Carnegie great spot for a wedding

    We didn't :)

    They even translated some of the menus into Slovak for some of my wife's family and had Slovak staff on our table.


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    #58
    Effects
    Registered Users Posts: 9,761 ✭✭✭Effects


    Toots wrote: »
    Please don't make assumptions like this about the OP. You have no idea how religious or non religious they are.

    I'm not making assumptions. I'm basing it on the definition of a Christian from the bible.


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    #59
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,905 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    xpletiv wrote: »
    I have been engaged for 6 months and have been looking around Ireland for a nice venue. The church we are getting married in only does Saturday ceremonies so we have to have it on a Saturday. What I cant believe is the absolute greed of venues; MOST cost about 100 euro a head, for basic enough package of canapes, 3 course and evening food and wine, but they also have insane minimum numbers of 100 people and sometimes more (140 ive found) meaning a wedding costs MINIMUM 10000 euros. Now, call me cynical, but are we in Ireland not still in recession!? Are people actually paying this crazy amounts?! And most importantly, with the lovely new budget that just came out, new house buyers have to have 20% of their mortgage (thanks older generation!) so I would now assume people are going to spend less on their wedding, yet we cant get past the minimum numbers part, and no where seems to be negotiable for price or numbers. Any tips? Also, to vendors out there that may read this, consider that the generation that is currently getting married is being destroyed by tax and costs as it is and now have to save 20% for houses. I really think the minimum numbers thing is a joke. Especially for the prices you are charging!

    What venues have you been looking at? There are a lot of venues who are charging a lot less than that. You need to cut your coat according to your cloth. If you've got a budget of €5000 there's no point in looking at uber fancy hotels/country estates because it's highly unlikely that you'll get the reception for that price, and you'll just end up disappointed.

    What can you actually afford to spend on your wedding? As you've already found out, a Saturday wedding is more expensive. A Saturday in summer/xmas will be more expensive again. So you need to decide whether you want to change church and get married on a weekday, or keep your church and accept that getting married on the Saturday will drive up your costs, and factor the Saturday premium into your package. Have you set a rough date yet? For example if you're looking at a Saturday in July, that's pretty much the most expensive day of the year to get married and hotels will have absolutely no problem filling that date, so they're under no pressure to cut prices/minimum numbers in order to get a booking.

    When you have that worked out what your budget is, then you need to make a list of things you want to have on the day ie cars, flowers, dj, band, photographer/videographer, dress, suits, bridesmaids/groomsmen etc.

    Decide which ones you HAVE to have, and which ones you would consider going without if the budget is getting stretched.

    Next make a guest list, so you'll know for definite how many people you want to have at the wedding (there may be less on the day due to declines but that's not something you need to worry about until nearer to the day iteself).

    Once you know that, look for venues that don't have huge minimum numbers. If you see somewhere that you really like but that the minimum numbers is putting you over budget, don't be afraid to email/call them and see how flexible they are on the numbers. One of the advantages to getting married mid week in the off season is that hotels are much more willing to negotiate on stuff like price per head, minimum numbers, and extras thrown in. Check what each package includes, bearing in mind that ones that cost slightly more per head might actually be better value in terms of what's included on them. If you see a venue that you like but they've not put the prices up on their website (SO ANNOYING) email them and ask for a price list.

    Don't even bother going to venues that are outside your price range. Have your research done before you go to view the hotel, so you'll know if you can afford it, then you're literally going to go and have a look at the venue in person, and meet the wedding co-ordinator. When you're at the venue, definitely check if there's any wiggle room with the prices, but at least you'll be in the position that if they say no, it won't mean that you'll have to go back to the drawing board.

    Just to give you a few ideas of hotels in the dublin region that are doing prices for less than €100 per head, here's a few I've found:

    Woodenbridge Hotel Diamond Package €36 per head (p/h) weekends, €29.50 midweek and off season. Minimum numbers 60, but will quote for smaller weddings.
    Woodenbridge Hotel Gold Package €47 p/h weekend, €39.50 midweek & off season. Minimum number 60 but will quote for smaller weddings. Includes wine for the meal, sparkling wine for the toast, evening food.
    Summerhill House Hotel Riverton Package €60 p/h Friday & Saturday from Sept to April, includes dinner and toast drinks. Minimum number 100.
    Summerhill House Hotel Country Rose Package €69 p/h. Same things as Riverton Package for dates in May to August. Minimum numbers 100.
    Moyvalley Hotel from €62.50, includes dinner & toast drinks, and evening food. Doesn't say what the minimum numbers are.
    Tulfarris Hotel €49 p/h November - February (excluding bank hols & 27-31 december), €59 p/h in March, April & October, €55 p/h Sunday-thursday May-Sept excluding bank hols. All include wine for dinner and evening food. Minimum numbers 100 for weekend and 80 for mid week.
    Leixlip Manor Sapphire Package €50.50 p/h for Friday or Saturday in November, December (excl 26-31), March & April. €59 p/h for Friday or Saturday in May to October. Includes wine with dinner, and evening food. Minimum numbers 75 November - April, 90 May to October.

    That's all I've got time for at the minute, but should give you a good idea of what's out there for well under €100 per head, and with lower minimum numbers. All of these hotels have mentioned on their site that they will cater for smaller weddings also. Good luck with the hunt.


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    #60
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,905 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    Effects wrote: »
    I'm not making assumptions. I'm basing it on the definition of a Christian from the bible.

    Again, you have no idea whether or not the OP is a practicing catholic. Also, have a read of the forum charter, particularly the bits about 'Keeping It Civil' and arguing with moderators on thread.


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    #61
    Effects
    Registered Users Posts: 9,761 ✭✭✭Effects


    Toots wrote: »
    Again, you have no idea whether or not the OP is a practicing catholic. Also, have a read of the forum charter, particularly the bits about 'Keeping It Civil' and arguing with moderators on thread.
    Thanks for the reply but I was referring to Christians, not Catholics. It's not the same thing.


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