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Strange feelings for a guy

  • 24-03-2015 1:43am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I'm bi (not out about it). I've liked and done stuff with guys since I was 10 (only started liking girls when I was 14) I haven't dated a guy since I was 20 (6 years ago)

    Last December I met my girlfriend she is a lot younger than me (20) she looks like a stuck up bitchy super model but she is nothing like that at all :) shes not only my girlfriend but also my best friend. Perfect girlfriend and we both love each other I couldn't live with her in my life.

    Last month I met this guy through social networking we hit it off immediately and we talk to each other all the time. I normally don't get on with straight guys in fact none of my male friends are straight at all. I find most straight guys possessive jealous and controlling and I have lost numerous friends over jealousy.

    Anyway from the moment I met him I've felt this connection to him. It depresses me when i'm apart from him. I just really love been around him. He went to bed right now and its torturing me I miss him. But I feel the exact same about my gf shes so beautiful I can't stop thinking about her (though he is beautiful too and I do tell him how attractive he is all the time though my gf is the only person who attracts/turns me on) I don't think what I am feeling for him is love as in I want a relationship with him but I do love and care a lot about him and he's a lot more to me than a friend.

    Tried my best to explain it above. He knows how I feel he was better than okay with it. Actually made us even closer.


Comments

  • #2
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    You need to measure your feelings for both your girlfriend and this guy you've met. I'm afraid its probably going to be a hard decision to make. You sound as though you're falling for this guy. If I was in the position of having to make a decision as to what guy (if I had a choice) that I could see a future with, then the feelings come into play. If you're with your girlfriend and you're missing him? You need to stand back and make a decision. From reading your post, I think you've made the decision.

    One thing I wouldn't do? Is cheat on your girlfriend. Only you can make the decision and choose who you see a future with.


  • #3
    Rick_
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,611 ✭✭✭Rick_


    So, what are you looking for exactly? Advice? To be told you probably shouldn't do anything with this guy whilst still with your girlfriend? You just made a statement and stopped, so not sure what to say in response to this really if you don't tell us what problem, if any, you have with your situation.


  • #4
    floggg
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,824 ✭✭✭floggg


    Paddy C wrote: »
    So, what are you looking for exactly? Advice? To be told you probably shouldn't do anything with this guy whilst still with your girlfriend? You just made a statement and stopped, so not sure what to say in response to this really if you don't tell us what problem, if any, you have with your situation.

    Honestly, if you love your gf and don't wish to cheat and/or end it with her, then it's probably best you cut contact with this guy and try to get over him - unless you think your gf might be open to some form of monogamish/poly relationship.

    i doubt that's a runner though if not discussed previously, and in any event it would be a terrible idea to start that type of relationship or arrangements after, and only because, you've already fallen for somebody.


  • #5
    tomato1234
    Registered Users Posts: 75 ✭✭tomato1234


    anon12345678909 wrote: »
    I'm bi (not out about it). I've liked and done stuff with guys since I was 10 (only started liking girls when I was 14) I haven't dated a guy since I was 20 (6 years ago)

    Last December I met my girlfriend she is a lot younger than me (20) she looks like a stuck up bitchy super model but she is nothing like that at all :) shes not only my girlfriend but also my best friend. Perfect girlfriend and we both love each other I couldn't live with her in my life.

    Last month I met this guy through social networking we hit it off immediately and we talk to each other all the time. I normally don't get on with straight guys in fact none of my male friends are straight at all. I find most straight guys possessive jealous and controlling and I have lost numerous friends over jealousy.

    Anyway from the moment I met him I've felt this connection to him. It depresses me when i'm apart from him. I just really love been around him. He went to bed right now and its torturing me I miss him. But I feel the exact same about my gf shes so beautiful I can't stop thinking about her (though he is beautiful too and I do tell him how attractive he is all the time though my gf is the only person who attracts/turns me on) I don't think what I am feeling for him is love as in I want a relationship with him but I do love and care a lot about him and he's a lot more to me than a friend.

    Tried my best to explain it above. He knows how I feel he was better than okay with it. Actually made us even closer.

    I think you have answered the question yourself. You are bi. I am not sure what kinda of relationship you have with your gf. Is it monogamous, open or poly relationship?

    My answer is in one sentence: "Honesty is the best policy".


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