Weirdest thing your housemate has done?

ash777 · 06-09-2015 2:02am

gormdubhgorm wrote: »

The weird part of his stinginess was when I caught him using handcream to wash dishes instead of buying washing up liquid...

Please tell me you meant hand wash/liquid soap?:P

Allyall · 06-09-2015 2:32am

Fr_Dougal wrote: »

Got up and peed on the floor in front of guests, then left the kitchen. Another time I was watching TV and he came in and started having a jimmy tank.

Have had him since he was a puppy.

What's a Jimmy Tank? *

*I've heard 'pedal & crank' and 'jimmy riddle' before, but never "jimmy tank"

Is it a sh!t?

La_Gordy · 06-09-2015 2:50am

Allyall wrote: »

What's a Jimmy Tank? *

*I've heard 'pedal & crank' and 'jimmy riddle' before, but never "jimmy tank"

Is it a sh!t?

I fear it's ah ****, hen.

philstar · 06-09-2015 10:50am

tommy tank

gormdubhgorm · 06-09-2015 12:10pm

ash777 wrote: »

Please tell me you meant hand wash/liquid soap?:P

haha yes I did mean hand wash/liquid soap your mind can rest easy!

ash777 · 07-09-2015 1:24am

gormdubhgorm wrote: »

haha yes I did mean hand wash/liquid soap your mind can rest easy!

Thank Christ for that. :P

biketard · 07-09-2015 4:21am

BattleCorp wrote: »

From a lazyness point of view I love the "ghost sh1tes". There the ones that disappear down the ubend without flushing and then when you wipe your arse, there's no trace that the sh1te was ever there.

Ah yes, the old "clean getaway".

Mehaffey1 · 07-09-2015 4:31am

My old housemate slept through a burning log going through the floorboards of his bedroom overnight. Really old house with open fireplaces in every room and a log rolled out onto the floor with his sleeping in bed five feet aeay. He woke up twice during the night, the first time he opened the window then back to sleep. Second time went and got a glass of water. Very exhausted by the farm work we were flat out at. By morning it had burnt a hole a foot wide through the wooden floorboards and through the beams the house rests on.

The thing that saved us was the house was too old and damp to actually go up in flames, the smell of smoke was unreal for two weeks after.

Shemale · 07-09-2015 8:05am

TheSheriff wrote: »

two other house mates (both girls who didnt have as strong personalities as her)

Who werent prentencious ***** you mean.

Shemale · 07-09-2015 8:15am

Tompatrick wrote: »

How much potty paper do you get through?

You must have gone out with some big vagina ladies, they are getting away with murder

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=I-vs8fwgwk0

Shemale · 07-09-2015 8:20am

BattleCorp wrote: »

Something woke me later in the night and I saw one of the other women get up out of bed, go over to a chest of drawers, open the bottom drawer, sit down on it and take a p1ss. She then closed the drawer and got back into the bed.

Does that qualify as disgusting?

You do know they blamed you for pissing in the drawer right?

rgmmg · 07-09-2015 9:23am

BattleCorp wrote: »

Not really my housemate as such but anyway.

One time back in college I got lucky and got to go home with a bird. She shared a big bedroom with two other girls. There were three double beds in the room.

Anyway, we did the biz and fell asleep. Something woke me later in the night and I saw one of the other women get up out of bed, go over to a chest of drawers, open the bottom drawer, sit down on it and take a p1ss. She then closed the drawer and got back into the bed.

Does that qualify as disgusting?

She was obviously a happy girl. Think she was just marking her territory

BattleCorp · 07-09-2015 12:27pm

Shemale wrote: »

You do know they blamed you for pissing in the drawer right?

Nope, I didn't get blamed for that. There was another eye witness.

Sadly I was correctly blamed a few hours earlier that night for not controlling my liquid emitions, something to do with " unexpectedly arriving".

The Randy Riverbeast · 07-09-2015 12:29pm

One girl I lived with it the sofa cushions on her bed and slept on that. No bed sheets or anything.

Knasher · 07-09-2015 1:30pm

I lived with a group of people in college who decided one evening that it would be very therapeutic for them to fill 2 litre bottles with water, freeze them, and smash them against the ground and walls. The first evening they had this therapy session, I arrived home late from college to find the entire living room covered in ice. But the therapy apparently worked so they decided to repeat it the next night, until one of the girls in the apartment below us came up in tears to give out about the noise as she was trying to study for her final exams.

J Mysterio · 07-09-2015 1:35pm

The mind boggles

Tompatrick · 07-09-2015 1:36pm

A mate of mine lived with the filthiest bird ever - and I don't mean in a good way ! She was a Welsh hippy who didn't take showers instead she told the other housemates she pushed a garlic clove into her anus as it was supposed to be a more natural way for the body to cleanse and odour itself. Deodorant was not being used by her obviously.

Never met here but was over in the gaff once when she was out and the stink was horrible.

ash777 · 08-09-2015 12:15am

Knasher wrote: »

I lived with a group of people in college who decided one evening that it would be very therapeutic for them to fill 2 litre bottles with water, freeze them, and smash them against the ground and walls. The first evening they had this therapy session, I arrived home late from college to find the entire living room covered in ice. But the therapy apparently worked so they decided to repeat it the next night, until one of the girls in the apartment below us came up in tears to give out about the noise as she was trying to study for her final exams.

Did they damage the walls?

Canard · 08-09-2015 6:02pm

rawn wrote: »

My housemate did that too. "Oh look i bought more ceramic oven dishes and a rice cuber! So you all owe me €2 each." Eh how bout no.

Oh god, my housemates created many stories I'd rather not remember, but the French girl was awful. She made the five of us a quiche and then charged us each €6.50 for the ingredients? We lived in Spain, it's so cheap there...like I'd spend less on my weekly shop. Never gave her the money; I'd given her food when she arrived and she was always sneaking it too. :rolleyes: she never did stop making those quiches...

irish_goat · 08-09-2015 6:44pm

I lived with a crazy guy from Luxembourg. I landed home drunk one day to see a plastic takeaway tub on the kitchen counter with what looked like grated carrot in it. Got closer and saw there was some little air holes in it and then when I picked it up it was full of feckin' snails! Asked him in the morning what the **** he was doing and he said that he was fattening them up.

Cue 2 weeks later I ask him when the big meal is and he says he's grown too attached to them and was gonna keep them as pets. Went out and bought a tank and everything. Mentalist.

Shergar6 · 08-09-2015 10:13pm

Tompatrick wrote: »

A mate of mine lived with the filthiest bird ever - and I don't mean in a good way ! She was a Welsh hippy who didn't take showers instead she told the other housemates she pushed a garlic clove into her anus as it was supposed to be a more natural way for the body to cleanse and odour itself. Deodorant was not being used by her obviously.

Never met here but was over in the gaff once when she was out and the stink was horrible.

I read the first line wrong and thought your mate was WITH this girl so the remainder of the post was really disturbing! Though i've often had to work alongside people whose personal hygiene is shocking - yet they are in serious relationships. I don't get it.

cazzer22 · 08-09-2015 10:39pm

TheSheriff wrote: »

Also lived with a primary school teacher who everyday at 3pm ( the rest of the house finished work at 5pm) would land back from work, change into her dressing gown, put on one of these mud mask type things and cucumbers over her eyes and LOCK, yes LOCK herself in the living room until about 9pm that night. She didnt have the tv on, she would just sit in there in complete darkness, curtins closed and ignoring if we knockeed (or banged) on the door. When confronted she said she needed to rest after her stressful day at work. Every fecking day was a stressful one it seems.

Without fail, this happened every single day. I eventually lost it with her and took the lock out of the living room door one weekend.

Possibly the most inconsiderate bitch i've ever had the pleasure of meeting

Not too dedicated if she's home for 3 o'clock. I rarely get home before 5. What a cow.

Insect Overlord · 08-09-2015 11:32pm

cazzer22 wrote: »

Not too dedicated if she's home for 3 o'clock. I rarely get home before 5. What a cow.

Calm yourself there. There are still some schools that lock up at 3:00 and the teachers have to get everything done at home instead of in their classrooms. Hardly fair to insult those teachers just because they get back home a little earlier than you do.

RichFTW · 08-09-2015 11:36pm

Had years of decent housemates but then got stung with 4 in a row of complete weirdos/a-holes. Worst was probably this schizophrenic who had a breakdown one night. He originally moved in before starting college as a mature student. Did some slightly weird stuff at the start like showering with the door open and claiming to be a vegetarian one night and look down at us meat eaters but then eat a burger the next day.

Anyway, all of us were sitting in the sitting room one night and one of the other housemates got up to go to the shop. "John" stands up and proceeds to ask him if he is Sean Connery over and over to his face really fast. Other housemate didn't know what to do so tried to walk out the door so John follows him out into the street in his bare feet and starts shouting Bridget Bardot over and over while running up and down the street.

Comes back inside after a while and is now a boxing trainer from the US training the next champ (accent and all). Sits down on the couch and starts talking to "the boxer" while shadow boxing and then walks out the back of the house and begins to punch the wheelie bin for a hour or so. Eventually stops and walks back in with a crazy look in his eyes and goes into his room. Needless to say I locked my room that night. Got back from work the next day to find his brother had come to collect his stuff and move him out. Turns out he had stop taking his meds and had another breakdown at college and got taken away. Never saw him again.

Close second was the chronic alcoholic I moved in with who stayed up until 5 every morning drinking and blaring the TV. My room was next to the sitting room so he basically kept me up all night. First night I moved in, he accused me of being a spy for one of his rival nightclub owners trying to find out his next big idea. Guy had co-owed a restaurant 4 years ago for 3 months before it went bust so he was clearly delusional. Used to make up the most ridiculous stories as well. Ended up moving out as soon as I found a place after about 3 weeks.

happypants · 09-09-2015 11:52pm

This whole thread to me highlights the extent of people with mental health issues out there!

Weirdest trait of a housemate I noticed was one guy used to eat wheetabix for breakfast but seemingly had a seperate bowl he used to "spittle" bits of wheatabix into and leave it on the window ledge beside the sink. I tried to figure out why but I've no idea, maybe he didn't like the top part of the wheatabix and milk when it's heated?? Why not just empty it into the bin?? Disgusting and weird. He was also adverse to ever, ever cleaning up after himself and would just walk away from his dishes after he ate or used them. He would literally stand up from the table and walk off. We tried the tactic of asking him (no avail) then tried not cleaning up after him but he ignored the dishes for days even though they were still at the table exactly as he left them. Eventually one of the lads got so pissed off he put all the used dishes in a pile on the f*ckers bed. I don't live there anymore but apparently nothing has changed.

ash777 · 13-09-2015 12:30am

happypants wrote: »

Weirdest trait of a housemate I noticed was one guy used to eat wheetabix for breakfast but seemingly had a seperate bowl he used to "spittle" bits of wheatabix into and leave it on the window ledge beside the sink. I tried to figure out why but I've no idea, maybe he didn't like the top part of the wheatabix and milk when it's heated?? Why not just empty it into the bin?? Disgusting and weird. He was also adverse to ever, ever cleaning up after himself and would just walk away from his dishes after he ate or used them. He would literally stand up from the table and walk off. We tried the tactic of asking him (no avail) then tried not cleaning up after him but he ignored the dishes for days even though they were still at the table exactly as he left them. Eventually one of the lads got so pissed off he put all the used dishes in a pile on the f*ckers bed. I don't live there anymore but apparently nothing has changed.

How old was he?

astonaidan · 13-09-2015 2:05am

Lets see I think Ive lived with one of the biggest retards around
-didnt understand cleaning, even after we told him to cop on he never did it, went to my girls every weekend and rubbish bin full and food discarded everywhere after another houseparty
-everytime i brought a girl home doesnt matter what the time he got up to shower and sit in his towel across from us in the living room
-when he moved he messaged all the girls we were mutual friends with saying i hadnt payed the rent and he had to cover me and other housemate, then adding xxx to end of messages, these were girls hes spoke to once when they were out with me, who he added from searching my friends list

Honestly hop to never meet this guy again, think ill murder him

rawn · 13-09-2015 2:20am

astonaidan wrote: »

Lets see I think Ive lived with one of the biggest retards around
-didnt understand cleaning, even after we told him to cop on he never did it, went to my girls every weekend and rubbish bin full and food discarded everywhere after another houseparty
-everytime i brought a girl home doesnt matter what the time he got up to shower and sit in his towel across from us in the living room
-when he moved he messaged all the girls we were mutual friends with saying i hadnt payed the rent and he had to cover me and other housemate, then adding xxx to end of messages, these were girls hes spoke to once when they were out with me, who he added from searching my friends list

Honestly hop to never meet this guy again, think ill murder him

Did you pay rent?

astonaidan · 13-09-2015 2:24am

rawn wrote: »

Did you pay rent?

Yeah he wasnt even living in the house anymore, he had moved across the country and found a sub let for one month.
Some of the stuff he did was crazy, i started work at 5am and he used to finish at 1 come in and start playing trance music.
He was just a terrible person

B.A._Baracus · 13-09-2015 2:37am

rgmmg wrote: »

Lived with a guy who was also the landlord. Rent was all inclusive and that supposedly covered all items. There was no toilet roll one day so I joked with him to go and get some but he replied "Yeah, we don't have any in at the moment but if you need a dump just have a bath afterwards - that's what I've been doing." Not sure how long we'd been out of toilet roll tbh.

Turned out he was bi too which I realised about two weeks after moving in having returned from work to find him wearing lipstick and rouge. His boyfriend "Dave" was on his way round for a night in with him. "Dave gives the best blowjobs ever" he told me assuredly. Thankfully, I never found out.

I just laughed so hard reading that :pac:

ash777 · 13-09-2015 4:53am

astonaidan wrote: »

-everytime i brought a girl home doesnt matter what the time he got up to shower and sit in his towel across from us in the living room

Very strange.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 13-09-2015 5:20am

I lived with an Afrikaner of Dutch Irish extraction in a three way apartment share and he wad a very strange fish. Very rude, almost like he had Aspergers or something, he used to bring this yoke back from the campus on a regular basis and bang her in his room and ask did we hear?

He'd get thick if we said no, He was a genuine oddbod who I felt uncomfortable around. Myself and the other chap had sourced other accom after the xmas break.

philstar · 13-09-2015 10:54am

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

he used to bring this yoke back from the campus on a regular basis and bang her in his room and ask did we hear?

He'd get thick if we said no,

:pac: he was disappointed none of you heard his sexual prowess ?

weemcd · 13-09-2015 11:09am

Goes home every weekend the second he finishes work like a fúckin child. Must be afraid of having to spend money on food he can get at home or do his own washing.

I get off lightly tho

Ted_YNWA · 13-09-2015 11:12am

weemcd wrote: »

Goes home every weekend the second he finishes work like a fúckin child. Must be afraid of having to spend money on food he can get at home or do his own washing.

I get off lightly tho

Do you live with me ?

Have a housemate the exact same, brings back "mammy dinners" to do them during the week too.

weemcd · 13-09-2015 11:33am

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

Do you live with me ?

Have a housemate the exact same, brings back "mammy dinners" to do them during the week too.

It's just a 2 bedroom flat, so I doubt it. Sounds exactly the same though, with the mammy dinners. If he's not re-heating those he's heating up oven chips and birdseye breaded chicken. Never seen him cook a vegetable yet. Seems to be able to cook about 3 things. Does other dumb **** like use a jar of curry that's been opened over the course of 2 weeks, or use butter past its sell by dates. (I'm not eating butter this weather or I would have got something in date.) Smart enough lad, but I be looking at him like he's a ****in moron quite a lot.

We live in Belfast which is actually quite a cool place for going out and things to do etc. But he insists on going back to the schticks to go to his mates house (the one mate who actually doesn't live with his ma still) to play Mario kart and smoke joints all weekend. His mates are sound enough but complete manchild mammys boys Beta's with very little going for them. All late 20's btw.

Nice enough lad but his life's ambitions seem to be : mediocrity, spending as little money as possible and smoking joints watching TV. I like a smoke myself but I hope I'm a little more diverse in my outputs.

Ted_YNWA · 13-09-2015 11:39am

Using stuff past sell by dates wouldn't bother me. Pay no heed to them, that is the reason people waste food. If it looks / smells & tastes ok then it is grand. But that is the topic for another thread.

heldel00 · 13-09-2015 3:51pm

weemcd wrote: »

Goes home every weekend the second he finishes work like a fúckin child. Must be afraid of having to spend money on food he can get at home or do his own washing.

I get off lightly tho

Absolutely nothing wrong with this. Re-read the thread title!

Ted_YNWA · 13-09-2015 3:58pm

If I was to go home every weekend with my washing in tow & raid my parents fridge/presses, I wouldn't be long told to grow up. My housemate is early 30's, same as me. Full time job.

heldel00 · 13-09-2015 4:05pm

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

If I was to go home every weekend with my washing in tow & raid my parents fridge/presses, I wouldn't be long told to grow up. My housemate is early 30's, same as me. Full time job.

If the thread was called "lamest thing your housemate has done" then yeah but weirdest? Nah

Daisy78 · 13-09-2015 4:24pm

Filling our saucepans with bread and milk to leave in the garden to entice the garden snails. Dead snails disposed of in the morning and saucepan returned to cupboard.

Guy who stole everything money, food, whatever he could get his hands on. Also played hardcore techno music at 4 in the morning.

Current housemate...could write a book...but will refrain from commenting....on this occasion. .

ash777 · 15-09-2015 1:51am

Daisy78 wrote: »

Filling our saucepans with bread and milk to leave in the garden to entice the garden snails. Dead snails disposed of in the morning and saucepan returned to cupboard.

...So that he could kill them???

Daisy78 · 15-09-2015 11:20pm

ash777 wrote: »

...So that he could kill them???

Yes. So she could kill them. Forgot to mention there was some beer in there too!

ash777 · 16-09-2015 2:17am

Daisy78 wrote: »

Yes. So she could kill them. Forgot to mention there was some beer in there too!

Was she French?

16-09-2015 10:42am

weemcd wrote: »

Goes home every weekend the second he finishes work like a fúckin child. Must be afraid of having to spend money on food he can get at home or do his own washing.

I get off lightly tho

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

If I was to go home every weekend with my washing in tow & raid my parents fridge/presses, I wouldn't be long told to grow up. My housemate is early 30's, same as me. Full time job.

These posts have no place in this thread.

Some people just work in a place and their life is somewhere else so obviously they go straight home at weekends and for any holidays etc. Absolutely nothing wrong with it, I go home about every second weekend myself but there might be a spell where I'd go home every weekend for a few months in a row if I wanted to and the majority of bank holidays, christmas or when I take annual leave are spent at home.

If person had a wife and kids in one part of the country and worked in another people would see nothing wrong with them going home every weekend why the double standards for a single person who wants to be at home, see their friends etc.

What is it with after hours and ridiculing those who like being at home.

bucketybuck · 16-09-2015 10:48am

Devin Unsightly Farmer wrote: »

If person had a wife and kids in one part of the country and worked in another people would see nothing wrong with them going home every weekend why the double standards for a single person who wants to be at home, see their friends etc.

Because they aren't going back to see their wife and kids, they are off sucking from their mothers teat like a bloody toddler.

16-09-2015 10:49am

bucketybuck wrote: »

Because they aren't going back to see their wife and kids, they are off sucking from their mothers teat like a bloody toddler.

Absolute load of nonsense.

There is no difference, both peoples lives are in their home areas not where they work. Some people really need to get that into their heads, not everyone chose to move for work and if home is close enough to go every weekend then why wouldn't they.

How often is "acceptable" to visit home once a year or something I suppose? I pity people with your outlook on life.

Personally I plan to build a house on our land next door to my parents house in the coming years (as many of my friends have done or are doing).

bucketybuck · 16-09-2015 10:55am

Devin Unsightly Farmer wrote: »

Absolute load of nonsense.

There is no difference, both peoples lives are in their home areas not where they work. Some people really need to get that into their heads, not everyone chose to move for work and if home is close enough to go every weekend then why wouldn't they.

How often is "acceptable" to visit home once a year or something I suppose? I pity people with your outlook on life.

I pity the parents having to subsidize grown men every weekend.

16-09-2015 10:58am

bucketybuck wrote: »

I pity the parents having to subsidize grown men every weekend.

I wouldn't like to have parents that aren't glad to see their children when ever they want to come home. My parents would be very disappointed if I wasn't home very regularly.

Obviously some very strange parent-child relationships out there. People not wanting to visit home regularly and parents not wanting to see their children regularly, very strange indeed.

L1m1tless · 16-09-2015 11:02am

More stories please, less bickering.

We had a housemate in college who would hide under blankets in the sitting room. She was really small so most of the time we didn't notice her there. She would be listening to us chat, then confront us about stuff later. The amount of times someone almost crushed her by sitting on her was unreal.

Weirdest thing your housemate has done?

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