"I'm As Serious As Cancer When I Say Rhythm Is A Dancer!"

SharpshooterTom · 13-06-2012 7:38am #1

Regarded as the worst lyric apparantly in music history.

I don't know about much the song now as it was a bit before my time I have to be honest. But apparantly it was number 1 for 6 weeks this time 20 years ago in the UK and a massive 8 weeks here in Ireland. One our longest numbers ones ever amazingly enough.

Obviously a popular song back in those days I guess if you're old enough to remember it? Despite the weird lyric. (2:38 btw)

"You can feel you can feel it..rhythm!" lmao

PinkFly · 13-06-2012 7:40am

Awwe the good auld days!!

xzanti · 13-06-2012 7:47am

Gnobe wrote: »

I don't know about much the song now as it was a bit before my time

GTF

It's still played in most nightclubs of a Friday and Saturday night..

J Cheever Loophole · 13-06-2012 7:48am

Reminds me of a great Summer - Euro Championships in Sweden - played against a backdrop of Nirvana's Nevermind and trips to Dublin with Rollin' Rock carryouts, following our brilliant minor team. Wonderful memories!! :cool:

abouttobebanned · 13-06-2012 7:50am

They knew.

clappyhappy · 13-06-2012 7:53am

What are you asking, is it "are there worse song lyrics?", or do we know the song.

Nodin · 13-06-2012 8:04am

Gnobe wrote: »

Regarded as the worst lyric apparantly in music history.

..............

That I doubt.....
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/blackeyedpeas/myhumps.html

dodzy · 13-06-2012 8:07am

Ah yes, the good auld days. Swiftly followd by SNAP - "I got the power" - great stuff:D

xzanti · 13-06-2012 8:10am

2unlimited FTW

Father Damo · 13-06-2012 8:13am

It isnt possible to define the worst lyric ever written. It is only possible to confirm that it exists somewhere within the sludge that is the Black Eyed Peas back catalogue.

mud · 13-06-2012 8:14am

I always thought these were the worst:

BIG MOUNTAIN

but don't hesitate, cause your love wont wait...
I can see the sunset in your eyes
Brown and grey, blue besides
Clouds are stalking islands in the sun
Wish I could buy one out of season
But don't hesitate, cause your love wont wait...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYH9MugKJRg

Xavi6 · 13-06-2012 8:18am

Such naivety to a fantastic song. Kids these days :rolleyes:

abouttobebanned · 13-06-2012 8:20am

mud wrote: »

I always thought these were the worst:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYH9MugKJRg

Don't be silly.

The Saw Doctors
I Want you more

I want you more
Than the stars in the sky
Or a mountain bike
Or a bit more
Than al lift
When i'm ages thumin'
I want yo so much more
Than any other woman
More, more, more
I want you more,
I want you so much more.......
And I want you more
Than an ice cream cone

More than a hungry dog
Wants a bone
Duty free fags
Or a carton of wine
More than a pint after closing time
More than a ticket for the hogan stand
More than I want to shake the presidents hand
I want you so much
More, more, more,
I want you more
I want you so much more

xzanti · 13-06-2012 8:30am

Life by Des'ree has to be the worst lyrics of all time..

I don't want to see a ghost,
it's a fright that I fear most,
rather have a piece of toast,
watch the evening news

:eek:

mud · 13-06-2012 8:31am

abouttobebanned wrote: »

Don't be silly.

Ha! I see your Saw Doctors and raise you a Richie Kavanagh!

The Abomination

When I was just a little lad I used to go to school

I’d sit down there in the seat, feeling like a fool

The teacher toult us everything, everything we know

She had a great big lump of a stick that was bent into a bow

CHORUS:

She’d go “Aon focal, da focal, two focal eile, And I not knowing no focal at all

She’d go “Aon focal, da focal, two focal eile And I not knowing no focal at all

…..

She toult us how to say all our A.B.C.s

She showed us how to make little men out a plasticine

She taught us how to say our prayers, she toult us right from wrong

The only thing about it, we didn’t go to school too long

Chorus

She taught about the history, the Battle of the Boyne

And how to play a game with a chestnut on a twine

She says “Open up your catechism, learn of that information

If you don’t get it in, to your big thick head, you won’t get your conformation

Chorus

Well, the days we spent going to school, were the best years of our life

Tho’ at the time we thought they were full of trouble and strife

Now when I’m home on holiday I pass the old school gate

I think a the time I spent in there, them times the surely were great

Chorus

She’d go “Aon focal, da focal ,two focal eile,

And I not knowing no focal at all She’d go

“Aon focal, da focal, two focal eile And I not knowing no focal at all

Feiceann me,,, Feiceann tu,,, Thats The Truth says I ta you

She’d go “Aon focal, da focal, two focal eile

And I not knowing no focal at all

And we not knowing no focal at all

Cee-Jay-Cee · 13-06-2012 8:38am

FFS they're only lyrics and purely used to rhyme with Dancer. It was No.1 when I was in Santa Ponsa on my first holiday abroad with a bunch of friends, i think it was in 1992 it was played several times in the night clubs each nite and holds such good memories for me.

I can think of far worse lyrics....

What about Dead Kennedys 'kill the poor', or GBH's 'Necrophilia' ???

ollie1 · 13-06-2012 8:38am

20 years ago :eek: damn that makes me feel real old.

13-06-2012 8:39am

no no no no no no no no no no no no theres no lyrics

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar · 13-06-2012 8:40am

omfg
it's years since I heard that MJ video scream at the start of a video

the keen edge · 13-06-2012 8:49am

xzanti wrote: »

Life by Des'ree has to be the worst lyrics of all time..

:eek:

+1 to this.

NiallFH · 13-06-2012 8:53am

xzanti wrote: »

GTF

It's still played in most nightclubs of a Friday and Saturday night..

Aye those nightclubs that are out in the country somewhere and have the same 30 people in them every week :pac:

du Maurier · 13-06-2012 8:53am

Surely Ace of Base were knocking around this time as well. The Sign.

sunflower27 · 13-06-2012 8:56am

I remember one of the first times I was ever at a nightclub I requested
R Kelly, She's got that Vibe.... it cleared the dancefloor as no-one else had heard of it, so I danced away like a demon... my poor friends stuck with me, now that's love

I LOVED that song when I was 18

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICC73G0pi10

13-06-2012 9:04am

Never knew those lyrics! Infact I'd say I could probably be a contender for the what you thought the lyrics were thread :pac:

smash · 13-06-2012 9:06am

Not the worst lyrics, but probably the most offensive.

xzanti · 13-06-2012 9:08am

NiallFH wrote: »

Aye those nightclubs that are out in the country somewhere and have the same 30 people in them every week :pac:

No, anywhere that plays chart music.. you always get your bit of dance, bit of RnB.. and some 90's cheese at the end of the night..

Break for the Border, The Palace on Camden Street, Q Bar, Dandelion to name but a few places where I have definitely heard that tune rolled out.

Wibbs · 13-06-2012 9:09am

Father Damo wrote: »

It isnt possible to define the worst lyric ever written. It is only possible to confirm that it exists somewhere within the sludge that is the Black Eyed Peas back catalogue.

+1000. I can generally get on board with most music out there and get something from it, but that lot... Jesus.

Duckjob · 13-06-2012 9:10am

Inner Circle:

Girl I'm gonna make you sweat,
Sweat, 'til you can't sweat no more.
And if you cry out,
I'm gonna push it some more more more

sunflower27 · 13-06-2012 9:11am

xzanti wrote: »

No, anywhere that plays chart music.. you always get your bit of dance, bit of RnB.. and some 90's cheese at the end of the night..

And now, here's one for the laydeeezzzzzz....

Grease Megamix

xzanti · 13-06-2012 9:18am

sunflower27 wrote: »

Grease Megamix

Oh yeah, and that.. so many hazy memories of stamping my feet and clapping my hands like a fcuking tool to that stupid megamix.. :pac:

sunflower27 · 13-06-2012 9:19am

Corona..... Rythm of the night......

Oooooh yeah..... throws down glass on table, shimmies up to dancefloor, makes dick of self

smash · 13-06-2012 9:20am

Duckjob wrote: »

Inner Circle:

Not a patch on these lads:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WqHQ_wWbG9Y

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSz-hHDOwQ8

sunflower27 · 13-06-2012 9:20am

xzanti wrote: »

Oh yeah, and that.. so many hazy memories of stamping my feet and clapping my hands like a fcuking tool to that stupid megamix.. :pac:

And hurriedly search out equally tool friend to be 'Danny' to my 'Sandy'

:o

J Cheever Loophole · 13-06-2012 9:28am

Well, if it's crap lyrics you want, then Cool For Cats by Squeeze has to get a mention - "I kiss her for the first time, and then I take her home, I'm invited in for coffee and I give the dog a bone" :eek:

Even Noel Gallagher was moved to take the piss out of Jools Holland about that when he last appeared on his show - a mere 33 years later!!

I still thought Squeeze were great!!

xzanti · 13-06-2012 9:28am

Another doozy

Help the aged,
one time they were just like you,
drinking, smoking cigs and sniffing glue. Help the aged,
don't just put them in a home,
can't have much fun in there all on their own.

Give a hand, if you can,
try and help them to unwind.
Give them hope & give them comfort 'cos they're running out of time.

*In the meantime we try.
Try to forget that nothing lasts forever. No big deal so give us all a feel.
Funny how it all falls away.
When did you first realise?
It's time you took an older lover baby. Teach you stuff
although he's looking rough.
Funny how it all falls away.

Help the aged
'cos one day you'll be older too
- you might need someone who can
pull you through
& if you look very hard
behind the lines upon their face you may see where you are headed
and it's such a lonely place.

[*Repeat]
You can dye your hair
but it's the one thing you can't change.
Can't run away from yourself, yourself...

[*Repeat]
Funny how it all falls away. [x3]
So help the aged.

Paparazzo · 13-06-2012 9:38am

Nodin wrote: »

That I doubt.....
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/blackeyedpeas/myhumps.html

Jesus, every line is a contender for worse lyric ever.

Kirby · 13-06-2012 9:43am

mud wrote: »

I always thought these were the worst:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYH9MugKJRg

I always loved that song. It's the music and tune of a song that keeps people listening and coming back for more. Lyrics are overated.:p

stovelid · 13-06-2012 9:45am

I like the lyrics.

It's supposed to be some bloke shouting over a beat, not Proust.

Larianne · 13-06-2012 9:46am

Not the worst for the lyrics (I think) but does anyone know the lyrics to Snow's Informer ?? (without looking them up!) It sounds like he's saying "I lick your bum bum down/yeah.."

smash · 13-06-2012 9:50am

Larianne wrote: »

Not the worst for the lyrics (I think) but does anyone know the lyrics to Snow's Informer ?? (without looking them up!) It sounds like he's saying "I lick your bum bum down/yeah.."

Apparently it's "A licky boom-boom down" but that makes no sense so we'll stick with the rimming lyrics.

stovelid · 13-06-2012 9:50am

Larianne wrote: »

Not the worst for the lyrics (I think) but does anyone know the lyrics to Snow's Informer ?? (without looking them up!) It sounds like he's saying "I lick your bum bum down/yeah.."

He must have had the worst credibility problem in rap history:a white rapper. With glasses. From Canada.

Gee Bag · 13-06-2012 9:51am

Life by Des'ree, Sorry for the length of the quote.............

Chorus:
Life, oh life, oh life, oh life,
doo, doot doot dooo.
Life, oh life, oh life, oh life,
doo, doot dooo

I'm afraid of the dark,
'specially when I'm in a park
And there's no-one else around,

Ooh, I get the shivers
I don't want to see a ghost,
It's a sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast
And watch the evening news
(Repeat Chorus)

I'm a superstitious girl,
I'm the worst in the world
Never walk under ladders,
I keep a rabbit's tail

I'll take you up on a dare,
Anytime, anywhere
Name the place, I'll be there,
Bungee jumping, I don't care!
(Repeat Chorus)

life, doo, doot dooo
doo, doot dooo

So after all is said and done
I know I'm not the only one
Life indeed can be fun, if you really want to

Sometimes living out your dreams,
Ain't as easy as it seems
You wanna fly around the world,
In a beautiful balloon
(Repeat Chorus)

Sykk · 13-06-2012 9:53am

bluewolf wrote: »

no no no no no no no no no no no no theres no lyrics

Anyone else count the 'no's to make sure?

stovelid · 13-06-2012 9:56am

Best casually homophobic lyric of any 80s dance or rap song is from Funky Cold Medina when he finds out the mot is actually a fella:

"You know, ain't no plans with a man
This is the 80's, and I'm down with the ladies
Ya know?"