Flirting

JasonBourne 2.0 · 13-04-2009 2:44am #1

Curiosity i suppose more than a personal/relationship issue here really. While chatting with friends recently the topic of flirting came up. One issue that was discussed was do people do it just for self esteem/fun or because they maintain a genuine interest/attraction towards the other person. After continued debate we could not reach an agreement based on past experiences with the opposite sex, so i put the question to you boardsies: Do you flirt for fun or because you hold a genuine interest in someone? (note: this can include both verbal or non verbal flirting)

likely_lass · 13-04-2009 2:59am

JasonBourne 2.0 wrote: »

Curiosity i suppose more than a personal/relationship issue here really. While chatting with friends recently the topic of flirting came up. One issue that was discussed was do people do it just for self esteem/fun or because they maintain a genuine interest/attraction towards the other person. After continued debate we could not reach an agreement based on past experiences with the opposite sex, so i put the question to you boardsies: Do you flirt for fun or because you hold a genuine interest in someone? (note: this can include both verbal or non verbal flirting)

for me it can be both, say with a really good guy mate you play flirt and thats always just fun

with a stranger id never do it for fun, people you dont really know flirting=genuine interest

thats just me though

Polleta · 13-04-2009 3:12am

I never consciously flirt with guys unless I'm going out with them. I joke around with them laugh smile and I'm sure I probably am flirting but its not at all conscious.

I tend to treat most of my male friends the same way I treat my female friends joking around. If it comes across as flirting then it's not showing attraction at all.

If I'm attracted to a guy there will probably be more touching them and texting and so on and so forth.

jim o doom · 13-04-2009 3:41am

I've always been flirtatious - withmates and strangers. It's never really conciously done.. it's just my mannerism.. never because I'm specifically attracted to someone, just for a conversational buzz really I suppose

SoupyNorman · 13-04-2009 3:49am

My GF is totally oblivious to her flirting, she attracts a fair bit of attention but I'm not a childish jealous twerp so I take male attention towards her as a compliment. But she is well up on the flirt-o-meter after a few drinks. Its not intentional, I believe its human nature as Im a big flirt myself but through humor. I think it's obvious when a person is being flirtatious with intent and without....or I might be a total chump being played like a fiddle by my GF

JasonBourne 2.0 · 13-04-2009 3:55am

I find that most of my guy mates including myself would only flirt with a girl if they were attracted to her (e.g if i/we saw a girl in a bar/nightclub i/we would try and make eye contact or initiate a conversation) whereas my girl mates seem to be divided in relation to this topic usually saying it depends, sometimes for fun or other times they would would make an effort when in a social setting such as playing with their hair or touching as mentioned above to show intent to both friends/strangers. Just an observation

Silverfish · 13-04-2009 6:03pm

Moved from PI

Xavi6 · 13-04-2009 6:04pm

jim o doom wrote: »

I've always been flirtatious - withmates and strangers. It's never really conciously done.. it's just my mannerism.. never because I'm specifically attracted to someone, just for a conversational buzz really I suppose

So basically you're a prick tease.

shelly.m · 13-04-2009 6:09pm

for me i only really flirt if im interested in the guy:)

mental07 · 13-04-2009 6:10pm

Xavi6 wrote: »

So basically you're a prick tease.

Fixed that for you.

Pinky Pixie · 13-04-2009 6:13pm

likely_lass wrote: »

for me it can be both, say with a really good guy mate you play flirt and thats always just fun

with a stranger id never do it for fun, people you dont really know flirting=genuine interest

thats just me though

Agree 100% with you! I often flirt with my guy friends and visa versa. I don't do it in a "I want your body" type way more in a having a laugh way:P!

I think it is kinda wrong to flirt with a stranger, if you are really not interested. I know so many girls who go out and flirt with guys even though they have no attraction to them, just do it to get a free drink and feel a bit sexy. Personally I think that is like whoring yourself out for a drink! They are making a fool of the guy and themselves in my opinion.

In saying that, if I do spot a sexy stranger and get the chance I will flirt my ass off with them :P

Ash_M · 13-04-2009 6:14pm

I suppose I'm fairly flirtatious, but there's a difference if there's genuine interest there. Seems to be the usual thing in my experience, on a night out everyone's a bit flirty, but you can tell if someone's into someone.

sillyputty · 13-04-2009 6:14pm

I get told all the time i'm a total flirt but i have no idea i'm doing it also i have no idea when a guy is flirting with me.
Oblivious - table for 1.

When i flirt with a stranger im interested.

Dudess · 13-04-2009 6:20pm

I never consciously flirt either yet get told I'm such a flirt. I just chat and have a laugh with guys - there's no agenda or act there.

Abi · 13-04-2009 6:22pm

likely_lass wrote: »

for me it can be both, say with a really good guy mate you play flirt and thats always just fun

with a stranger id never do it for fun, people you dont really know flirting=genuine interest

thats just me though

Or say, if ya run out of money and everybody seems to be holding their drinks?

Doublin · 13-04-2009 6:26pm

Pinky Pixie wrote: »

Agree 100% with you! I often flirt with my guy friends and visa versa. I don't do it in a "I want your body" type way more in a having a laugh way:P!

I think it is kinda wrong to flirt with a stranger, if you are really not interested. I know so many girls who go out and flirt with guys even though they have no attraction to them, just do it to get a free drink and feel a bit sexy. Personally I think that is like whoring yourself out for a drink! They are making a fool of the guy and themselves in my opinion.

In saying that, if I do spot a sexy stranger and get the chance I will flirt my ass off with them :P

Definately, I have a couple of female friends who I always flirt with when we are out but not really touching so much (until I get a box for going too far:D) more verbal banter with the knowledge it won't go further.

Absolutely wrong to flirt with a stranger if you have no interest, it's just bad form

Aidric · 13-04-2009 6:26pm

bravestarr082 wrote: »

My GF is totally oblivious to her flirting, she attracts a fair bit of attention but I'm not a childish jealous twerp so I take male attention towards her as a compliment. But she is well up on the flirt-o-meter after a few drinks. Its not intentional, I believe its human nature as Im a big flirt myself but through humor. I think it's obvious when a person is being flirtatious with intent and without....or I might be a total chump being played like a fiddle by my GF

I know her well.

Dudess · 13-04-2009 6:48pm

Doublin wrote: »

Absolutely wrong to flirt with a stranger if you have no interest, it's just bad form

But not everyone flirts consciously - someone could have a very friendly chat and a great laugh with a person whom they're not interested in physically. Some might view that as flirting but it could just be the way they are.

JasonBourne 2.0 · 13-04-2009 6:54pm

But not everyone flirts consciously - someone could have a very friendly chat and a great laugh with a person whom they're not interested in physically. Some might view that as flirting but it could just be the way they are.

So what exactly would you constitute as conscious intentional flirting then in the sense that you say you could be having a chat/laugh which may or may not mean you are interested.

Dudess · 13-04-2009 6:58pm

Well, when unattached, I didn't set out to flirt - I just chatted/had a laugh. I can't do forced.

Professey Chin · 13-04-2009 8:10pm

Im not a flirt at all. I just go the surprise sex route :pac:

Insect Overlord · 13-04-2009 9:08pm

I've been with my OH for 20 months, and in that time I've not trusted myself to flirt with anyone (because that kind of behaviour led to misdemeanours in my previous relationship...)

I'm pretty messed up inside, but nobody knows...

Lilyblue · 13-04-2009 9:24pm

I am a naturally flirtious girl. I don't even realise I am flirting, it wouldn't go any further but I would flirt with male friends aswell as strangers without noticing

entropi · 13-04-2009 10:53pm

I wouldn't consciously do it if trying to get female attention, but in a fun and jokey way with friends it just happens naturally.

JasonBourne 2.0 · 13-04-2009 11:10pm

I am a naturally flirtious girl. I don't even realise I am flirting, it wouldn't go any further but I would flirt with male friends aswell as strangers without noticing

I wouldn't consciously do it if trying to get female attention, but in a fun and jokey way with friends it just happens naturally.

I dont understand, why would anybody flirt without any intention of it going further or not flirt to try and get male/female attention. If nobody flirted there would be no relationships because people wouldn't show interest in each other and nobody would know if anybody liked them. Not that im criticising your points or saying they're invalid i'm just curious.

Insect Overlord · 13-04-2009 11:11pm

JasonBourne 2.0 wrote: »

I dont understand, why would anybody flirt without any intention of it going further or not flirt to try and get male/female attention. If nobody flirted there would be no relationships because people wouldn't show interest in each other and nobody would know if anybody liked them. Not that im criticising your points or saying they're invalid i'm just curious.

Just for the fun of it?

Keogg · 14-04-2009 12:31am

Polleta wrote: »

I never consciously flirt with guys unless I'm going out with them. I joke around with them laugh smile and I'm sure I probably am flirting but its not at all conscious.

I tend to treat most of my male friends the same way I treat my female friends joking around. If it comes across as flirting then it's not showing attraction at all.

If I'm attracted to a guy there will probably be more touching them and texting and so on and so forth.

thats exactly my problem! I mean, girls joke/hug/giggle/etcetcetc and its all gravy, but if its a girl to a guy then its flirting. Drives me nuts it does.

S.I.R · 14-04-2009 6:27am

JasonBourne 2.0 wrote: »

: Do you flirt for fun or because you hold a genuine interest in someone? (note: this can include both verbal or non verbal flirting)

if by flirt you mean smuggle people into the back of my black and red van and for fun mean that i do it so i have workers my sweat shops, then yes, i do it all the time.

Professey Chin · 14-04-2009 8:10am

Keogg wrote: »

thats exactly my problem! I mean, girls joke/hug/giggle/etcetcetc and its all gravy, but if its a girl to a guy then its flirting. Drives me nuts it does.

Does this mean every girl wants wimmin?............or is that just my personal choice of interpretation?

Big Nasty · 13-10-2011 9:24pm

billyconlon wrote: »

can someone tell me if this is flirting??my gf said to a guy on fb that she missed him.the guy also asked her if she is still in love(with me) and she wrote-"think so ya".doesnt seem so sure!!she was never with this guy before but they flirted alot before we started dating.also another one of her friends is saying stuff to her like he loves her etc and she replies by saying awwww.and finally another guy she is friends with she sends many kisses to,writing stuff like mucho besos etc.is that too much or am i over reacting??thanks.sorry for jumping in here.im not sure how to start a new thread.

Apart from the fact that this thread is two and a half years old your gf sounds like a cnut

Temptamperu · 13-10-2011 9:30pm

I flirt for sport, its a safari out there thus I treat it as such.

Flirting

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