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xmas

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  • 19-10-2014 8:17pm
    #1
    lilydonoghue
    Registered Users Posts: 174 ✭✭


    we agreed to separate in august, but we have to live in the same house until it is sold. we will be here for xmas. our children have grown up and live independent lives. the thing is the other half wants to spend Christmas as usual and I don't know what I want to do. I wholeheartedly wish I was out of the house already and I do have options for xmas day other than stay here. my children don't seem to mind if they come up or not. I wonder what to do. the other half wants it normal because his mentally ill sister spends every Christmas with us and he doesn't want her upset. but I wonder why I should protect her or him. im devastated by the separation and very hurt and angry. what has been the experience of others on here


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    #2
    lazeedaisy
    Registered Users Posts: 1,328 ✭✭✭lazeedaisy


    Hi,

    Sorry to hear about this, my parents have recently split after 49 years of marriage.

    Don't let him dictate how you spend one more minute, I understand you have to live together, but my dad tried this on my mum, we had to rally and are sending her to family over Christmas, it's going to be tough enough on her, you have enough to be dealing with,

    Take control of your life and how you want it to be,

    I know and understand you need to keep the peace,

    I keep telling my mum when you come up against something, ask yourself if your best friend were going through it, what advice would you give, this does work as we tend not to think of ourselves as we do others,

    I am sorry as the breakup of any relationship is not easy,

    Talk to a good friend, as opposed to family,

    Good luck and the future is bright, start living yor life for you


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    #3
    lilydonoghue
    Registered Users Posts: 174 ✭✭lilydonoghue


    lazeedaisy thank you for such a lovely reply. you are right and it reminds me that I can now make my own life how I want it. I don't want to sit at home with him and his sick sister for another year, ive don't it for many years and it is so depressing. ill find something else to do and thank you for the support


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    #4
    Jamaican Me Crazy
    Registered Users Posts: 1,111 ✭✭✭Jamaican Me Crazy


    The previous poster put it perfectly.

    You take back the control and start living how you want to live. Make your own plans that will make you happy and that you can look forward to.

    Do not let yourself be manipulated. Your ex and his sister can make their own plans.


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