A modest proposal - we follow the US plan.

Capt'n Midnight · 23-03-2009 3:06am #1

US prison statistics http://safetyandjustice.org/info/nation/story/1186

Pew Center focused on comparing the incarcerated adult population to the total adult population of the country.

The report also reveals that one out of every 54 men is incarcerated in this country. One in nine African American men ages 20 to 34, one in thirty-six Hispanic men 18 or over, and one out of every 106 white men is in prison or jail. One out of every 265 women ages 35 – 39 are incarcerated, one in every 100 African American women, one in every 297 Hispanic women, and one in 355 white women are incarcerated.

The idea is that we increase our prison population to similar levels. It will provide jobs for construction workers and guards.

Since lawyers and courts and tribunals are so costly we could do it on the cheap by picking lots, and since we are going to have to put up to 1/9th of some target groups in the slammer justice will be speeded up. And it will remove some of the stigma of being a prisoner.

So what groups should we target with different odds in the lottery to be put in prison ? If we just put in bankers and politicians we'll never get the economy kick started.

Snowie · 23-03-2009 3:08am

I was hoping you said legalise all guns and go have a good old fasion lynching

orestes · 23-03-2009 3:09am

I vote we start by locking up people who start stupid threads about subjects they have no understanding of

skyhighflyer · 23-03-2009 3:09am

This is the worst idea I've ever heard.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar · 23-03-2009 3:09am

I vote we start locking up philosophers, if they were going to do anything useful they'd be scientists.

Tech3 · 23-03-2009 3:12am

We need to built more prisons anyway as many are exceeding their limits.

Its all in well but we have no money whatsoever to employ keynesian economics as our credit rating has gone from triple a status. We are billions in debt and I think there wont be any major construction projects coming anytime soon looking at the current situation

Manic Moran · 23-03-2009 3:15am

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

I was hoping you said legalise all guns and go have a good old fasion lynching

Could work. However, I would point out that from personal experience, using the guns to shoot at people is likely easier than trying to use them to lynch people.

NTM

Black Swan · 23-03-2009 3:17am

By the "Modest Proposal" title that Capt'n Midnight gave this thread, methinks he is playing at parody like Jonathan Swift, and is not serious in the slightest.;)

Karlusss · 23-03-2009 3:47am

I know this is a joke thread, but what would happen if the country did send all bankers and politicians to jail?

Who would run the country?

Who would run the banks?

People less good either democratically or on professional merit than the people who did before?

23-03-2009 3:55am

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

By the "Modest Proposal" title that Capt'n Midnight gave this thread, methinks he is playing at parody like Jonathan Swift, and is not serious in the slightest.;)

More like indecent proposal
Anyway, US crime figures just seem to prove that just jailing criminals dosen't work!

Manic Moran · 23-03-2009 3:59am

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

US prison statistics So what groups should we target with different odds in the lottery to be put in prison ? If we just put in bankers and politicians we'll never get the economy kick started.

The Golfrinchams had a similar idea, although they went with a full 1/3 of the population instead of the measly 1/9th you propose.

They selected the most useless 1/3 of the population; hairdressers, tired TV producers, insurance salesmen, personnel officers, security guards, management consultants, telephone sanitizers and the like, and told them that the planet was under threat from a mutant star goat, and sent them off. It worked well, the remainder led full, rich and happy lives until they were all suddenly wiped out by a virulent disease contracted from a dirty telephone.

I may suggest leaving one person of each type unremoved from society, just in case.

NTM

Tech3 · 23-03-2009 4:01am

Karlusss wrote: »

I know this is a joke thread, but what would happen if the country did send all bankers and politicians to jail?

Who would run the country?

Who would run the banks?

People less good either democratically or on professional merit than the people who did before?

We would need a radical reform of the whole system. The public sector needs to be stripped apart alot of dead wood in there. Im sure there are well capable people out there that would be able to run the country apart from our current crop of politicians.

I would rather see a communist state with better equality and a fairer society. The work of people not for themselves but for the good of the country. There are several areas that need developing so badly at the moment:

- so many schools with prefabs need to be turned into buildings
- broadband is very poor here, fibre optic technology should be installed
- HSE needs to be reformed
- more prisons as mentioned on the earlier post
- rail links to be upgraded to something internation class
- Renewable energy like nuclear needs to be looked into

Robbo · 23-03-2009 9:14am

tech2 wrote: »

We would need a radical reform of the whole system. The public sector needs to be stripped apart alot of dead wood in there. Im sure there are well capable people out there that would be able to run the country apart from our current crop of politicians.

I would rather see a communist state with better equality and a fairer society. The work of people not for themselves but for the good of the country. There are several areas that need developing so badly at the moment:

- so many schools with prefabs need to be turned into buildings
- broadband is very poor here, fibre optic technology should be installed
- HSE needs to be reformed
- more prisons as mentioned on the earlier post
- rail links to be upgraded to something internation class
- Renewable energy like nuclear needs to be looked into

Well, we have to end apartheid for one. And slow down the nuclear arms race, stop terrorism and world hunger. But we can't ignore our social needs. either. We have to stop people from abusing the welfare system. We have to provide food and shelter for the homeless and oppose racial discrimination and promote civil rights while also promoting equal rights for women but change the abortion laws to protect the right to life yet still somehow maintain women's freedom of choice.

We also have to control the influx of illegal immigrants. We have to encourage a return to traditional moral values and curb graphic sex and violence on TV, in movies, in pop music, everywhere. Most importantly we have to promote general social concern and less materialism in young people.

But I full agree with the Cap'n's proposal. Ethnic groups to be targeted may be decided by an AH poll and then they get one poster here to plead their case with reason and compassion. This shall be ignored.

The local economy of one of the offshore islands may be boosted by converting it to a Battle Royale style elimination prison.

CreepingDeath · 23-03-2009 10:12am

I think it costs something like €80,000 a year to maintain a prisoner in jail.
It would nearly be more cost effective to give them €50,000 a year not to commit crime :eek:

Although really, harsh physical punishment should be given out, hard labour etc. Introduce them to some hard work for the first time in their miserable lives.

Black Swan · 25-03-2009 4:29pm

Deleted User wrote: »

More like indecent proposal
Anyway, US crime figures just seem to prove that just jailing criminals dosen't work!

Hi DB! Amusing film reference! Regards the USA jailing people, well, over 90% will be released someday, and with the way they treat their offenders in the USA, why is anyone surprised when over 2/3's of them commit new crimes after release? If you treat someone like an animal, don't be surprised if they bite you later.

Turd Ferguson · 25-03-2009 4:35pm

I think we should lock people up for no reason. Like, I'll be walking down the street and I'll go "Hey shitface, get outta my sight!!" and all these policemen (because the policewomen will be back at the station doing the ironing) will get the guy and put him in jails.

A modest proposal - we follow the US plan.

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