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Robbin' Ba$tards

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  • 19-03-2009 3:59pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 796 ✭✭✭


    Firstly, don't know if this should be in Humour, Parenting, Cycles, or what - so feel free to move.

    Cycled into town on Patrick's Day taking in the buzz (City Centre), on my return journey, myself and her indoors decided to stop up at the tea cabin beside the zoo for some light refreshment.

    As herself came out with the drinks (sitting at the tables outside) a local skanger (We'll call him Anto) with bulmers can in hand and compulsory tracksuit and wolly jumper asked me in his best dublinese "Is that your bike" - pointing to one at the entrance gate

    I replied "no" and returned to tucking into my blueberry muffin when Anto turned and said "you'd want to lock it 'cause they is all robbin' bastards around here!!" and he proceeded to the toilet.

    Upon exiting the jax he proceeded out the gate where Anto my "concerned" friend starting wheeling the bike away.
    I thought this was brilliant. What class!!

    The fella sitting next to us let a roar at the Anto and he proceeding to release the bike back to the owners possesion but not before telling him that if he didn't want it robbed he should lock it and the owner was lucky not to have a blade in his neck for being such an annoyance.

    Makes me proud to be Irish - considering there were so many tourist around.

    Just thought I would share!!

    Any other funnies from the silly day!


Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 2,743 ✭✭✭funk-you


    I wouldn't be too worried about the tourists. There's scum everywhere, at least our are entertaining at times.

    -Funk


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,623 ✭✭✭Dancor


    Got to admire the young fellow.
    a local skanger (We'll call him Anto)

    Your the one that calls the bathroom ''a jax'' :p


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,020 ✭✭✭Ardscoil Ris


    When is the DVD coming out?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,476 ✭✭✭Mr.Lizard


    Johnnio13 wrote: »
    bulmers can in hand and compulsory tracksuit and wolly jumper asked me in his best dublinese "Is that your bike"

    Amateur thief! Nobody's gonna take him seriously while he's wearing one of those!


  • Registered Users Posts: 7,182 ✭✭✭Genghiz Cohen


    funk-you wrote: »
    I wouldn't be too worried about the tourists. There's scum everywhere, at least our are entertaining at times.

    -Funk

    There is a Chinese curse: "May you always live in interesting times."

    I'd much prefer if they kept to themselves and robbed from each other.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,476 ✭✭✭Mr.Lizard


    I'd much prefer if they kept to themselves and robbed from each other.

    They've got nothing to rob tho, apart from mountains and mountains of pyjamas.


  • Registered Users Posts: 33,079 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    Robbin Bastards.... Wasn't she Robbin Banks before she got married?

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,283 ✭✭✭Ross_Mahon


    Anto had a point though


  • Registered Users Posts: 23,984 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    There is a Chinese curse: "May you always live in interesting times."

    I'd much prefer if they kept to themselves and robbed from each other.

    Talking of the Chinese, there'd be 9 million bicycles not in Beijing if the scumbags went on a tour.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,164 ✭✭✭hobochris


    dancor wrote: »
    Got to admire the young fellow.



    Your the one that calls the bathroom ''a jax'' :p

    when in rome...


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  • Registered Users Posts: 15,094 ✭✭✭✭javaboy


    hobochris wrote: »
    when in rome...

    Go on.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,102 ✭✭✭✭Drummerboy08


    His name is Johnnio. Maybe he's distantly related to Anto?


  • Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 35,943 Mod ✭✭✭✭dr.bollocko


    javaboy wrote: »
    Go on.

    Yeah please do. I'm going there on holiday next week. Looking forward to it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,476 ✭✭✭Mr.Lizard


    Yeah please do. I'm going there on holiday next week. Looking forward to it.

    The phrase is "when in Rome do as the Romans do." So presumably you should spend your holiday living with your mother until you're 40 and then spend any free time you have left lechering at any woman who will give you the time of day.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,164 ✭✭✭hobochris


    javaboy wrote: »
    Go on.
    lol...

    I was talking about the use of the word Jax.
    Mr.Lizard wrote: »
    The phrase is "when in Rome do as the Romans do." So presumably you should spend your holiday living with your mother until you're 40 and then spend any free time you have left lechering at any woman who will give you the time of day.

    love the stereotyping..


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    While one has to commend the use of the soubriquet Anto, and the passable stage vernacular of cause they is all robbin' bastards, the OP doesn't really pass muster as a splenetic piece of prejudice without a 'bud' somewhere.


  • Registered Users Posts: 33,079 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    Mr.Lizard wrote: »
    They've got nothing to rob tho, apart from mountains and mountains of pyjamas.

    True, but a good pair of pyjamas in skangerville can go a long way in gaining a scumbag some respect.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭trout


    pyjama tax ... it's the way of the future.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,476 ✭✭✭Mr.Lizard


    hobochris wrote: »
    love the stereotyping..

    "There's no smoke without fire"
    - Nero, 64AD


  • Registered Users Posts: 81,865 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    Imagine if we started a gang of skangers and turned them into good samaritans? "Ai Lad yeh dropped your wallet! Give us a fiver? Yeh have to be careful bhoy, loads of thieveing scum on the streets here. Have a pleasant stay."

    They could walk the streets, looking after Dublin's naive tourists and work for tips!


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  • Registered Users Posts: 721 ✭✭✭TheTubes


    Overheal wrote: »
    Imagine if we started a gang of skangers and turned them into good samaritans? "Ai Lad yeh dropped your wallet! Give us a fiver? Yeh have to be careful bhoy, loads of thieveing scum on the streets here. Have a pleasant stay."

    They could walk the streets, looking after Dublin's naive tourists and work for tips!

    sounds like a reality tv show...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,554 ✭✭✭zonEEE


    well at least he ask you first, id say if you said yes he would of left it :D


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    Anyone dumb enough to leave a bike unlocked in public on a day like Paddy's day deserves to have it robbed tbh.


  • Registered Users Posts: 796 ✭✭✭Johnnio13


    Overheal wrote: »
    Imagine if we started a gang of skangers and turned them into good samaritans? "Ai Lad yeh dropped your wallet! Give us a fiver? Yeh have to be careful bhoy, loads of thieveing scum on the streets here. Have a pleasant stay.".

    We do, I think they are called the Guardian Angels in most cities.
    His name is Johnnio. Maybe he's distantly related to Anto?

    Touche!

    stovelid I would have used 'bud' if the petty criminal had. But alas they didn't.


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