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  • 10-09-2014 7:00pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 1


    Hi everyone,

    I'm a 22 year old male and the reason I started this thread was for some advice from experienced gay men. I have come to the conclusion that I might be Bi.
    I have never been with a man sexually, but over the last year I have certaintly found the idea really exciting. I have even started looking at other men in a sexual way in everyday life. and I would really like to make it happen.

    I know it's probably not the best thing to do but I have watched several gay porn vids and I now feel confident enough to try for myself..

    The thing is I don't have many gay friends and i would prefer to keep my business discreet for now as i'm only the the experimental stage I(so to speak lol).

    Where would be the best place to meet other young lads like myself who are curious? I have read a lot of the gay websites are full of chancers and old men desperate for a bit of action which is not really my thing..

    Any advice/help would be appreciated.. Thanks..


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 750 ✭✭✭playedalive


    ey,
    To be honest with you, I think you're better off going to some sort of a meet up, just chat to guys and see how you feel about it. As a gay man myself who has spent the past 2 years trying to get to grips with my sexuality, I have found it more beneficial to meet guys at meet-ups and see how I feel in their company and how that changes my perceptions of what it all really is. (there is a zoo meet up happening at the end of the month here on the LGBT forum)

    Of course, meeting guys for NSA is another option and can kill the curiosity, so to speak. You just have to be really careful. The grindr app is a bit of a hit and a miss. Tinder is another option if you have facebook. I think it's important to stress that gay porn, in ways, doesn't depict gay sex in a realistic light. Being turned on by porn might disappoint the real life scenario. So a real life scenario might disappoint you. Also there is a mixed bag on Grindr and a lot of guys are just interested in a once off and you need to ask yourself would you be happy with that. I know I'd rather be with someone I was honestly attracted to, instead of one night stands that fill a human need. But it took being with a couple of guys off Grindr to realise that and kill the curiosity. But I do stress being careful (if you go down that road), there are creeps on it but a bit of common sense (talking on the phone, etc) and using your real judgement will help.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,397 ✭✭✭✭azezil


    I'd never go with NSA meetups for a first try, they can go very very wrong and nasty. Some people who use those apps expect a certain level of experience I suppose you could say and can be impatient / get angry with virgins or guys just experimenting. Personally I'd get to know someone first and explain your situation before committing to something.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 750 ✭✭✭playedalive


    I think I should clarify that Azezil does bring up an interesting point. As 'hot'/interesting as NSA might be, it can be very overwhelming if you meet a guy and he tries to rush you. It can also be very disappointing as you can instinctively want something further from it (even though you know beforehand it won't happen after meeting them). Don't do NSA if it's not for you. I have known this from meeting guys on grindr after getting to know them. In this sense, you're better seeking out people like from BeLonGTo and boards meet ups, in order to get to know lads.


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