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To Walk Away Or Not

  • 02-06-2008 1:16pm
    #1
    Faerie087
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1 ✭


    I've been with my BF now for 4 years and have a 1.5 yr old baby.Recently though I find myself thinking that maybe I need to walk away from this.

    Since our baby was born my BF has had all liberties of going out with his friends on a regular basis while I sit at home even going so far as driving him and his friends to/from the pub.I don't mind this too much as I have quite a demanding stressful job which takes up most of my working week so I like to spend my weekend relaxing with the baby.

    What gets to me most though is that my BF hasn't gone near me in what feels like months unless hes laden full of beer.He won't even entertain the idea of going out with me until I suggest he goes to meet his friends to get him out of the house.

    To be fair during the week he does his share of housework but life has to be more than that.I am also at the point where my work has really paid off and I'm in a position to take out a mortgage of course this is something which my BF wants nothing to do with, preferring to have the cash free to go out with his mates.

    Am I being overbearing and should I let it go and get on with things? Or should I just lay down the issue and get out of there?


Comments

  • #2
    herya
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,571 ✭✭✭herya


    I'd say let him know very clearly what your thoughts and plans are. He may not be sensitive enough to figure it out himself if your relationship is smooth & comfortable for him. Judge his reaction and his answers, and make your decision from there.


  • #3
    Thumpette
    Registered Users Posts: 1,185 ✭✭✭Thumpette


    herya wrote: »
    I'd say let him know very clearly what your thoughts and plans are. He may not be sensitive enough to figure it out himself if your relationship is smooth & comfortable for him. Judge his reaction and his answers, and make your decision from there.

    I agree totally. Let him know how you feel, and make sure you're clear just how serious you are. Then, if things dont change, do walk away. From the sounds of it to be honest I doubt if things will change, but sometimes a reality check is all it might take.


  • #4
    SarahSassy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,145 ✭✭✭SarahSassy


    Faerie087 wrote: »
    I like to spend my weekend relaxing with the baby.

    I see a lot of my friends who are new Mum's with the same attitude and giving the baby the priority over the relationship... I can understand why you want to spend time with your baby but at the end of the day the relationship is also a priority... You and your bf seem to have some fundamental differences on what constitutes a parent and you will need to sit down and discuss them... All I am pointing out is that mothers sometimes put themselves in the martyr role when they choose to stay at home with the baby.... Im sure you can compromise and get a babysitter for every second weekend and try to keep the relationship alive...


  • #5
    Carrigart Exile
    Closed Accounts Posts: 994 ✭✭✭Carrigart Exile


    Re your boyfriend not going near you - quite possibly you have become 'The Untouchable Goddess, the Mother of his Child' and its only when he has a skinful that his old feelings towards you as that sassy sxy babe he married come through. Get some time for both of you without baby, I am certain grannies and grandpas would bite your hand off to get baby for teh weekend.


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