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difficult to hold friends

  • 05-07-2008 9:48pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1


    anyone any advice, i find that at first i have no problem starting a conversation with someone and getting to know them whether its college mates (when i went to college)people in work , whatever. In fact i am very approachable and i think when people first meet me they find me easy to talk to. However I find that as people get to know me and they discover the real me they tend to steer clear of me and dont give me the time of day. I used to think this was because I was too clingy and was maybe always ringing and texting people and suggesting doing things so i stopped being like that and now i just take people casual ie i will contact them every now and then but dont overdo it. this isnt working however and i am losing every potential friend i have. Maybe im boring i dont know, i find if i ask people questions i am interogating them and being nosey and if i tell them about me i feel i am boring them so what am i suppose to do. RIght now everyone i know is keeping away from me and im not sure why, members of my family ie cousins ,in-laws that i am sometimes frinedly with are making excuses when i suggest doing something, all my colleagues blank me I work in office environment for over 2 years now, when new people join and we get on ok we go out drinking etc put after about a month they stop going and become distant, I also find that people only talk to me when there is no one else to talk to it happens all the time, if i am in a room with 2 people and someone comes in they will only be interested in the other person and wont talk to me until that person is gone, thats not my imagintion its real and its not that i dont talk to them i try, just dont know what to do anymore i,ve given up trying and dont bother with people now because i know when they gat to know me they will be gone. any advice


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Intesting post, havent really seen similar posted before.

    Im defo no authority on the subject but i had very similar feelings on the subject a couple of years back.

    I cud start off really well with every tom, dick and harry. But after a time i felt it became boring for all involved (typically after the 3rd to 5th proper long chat/lunch/nite out).

    I blamed myself on this, i wasnt enough craic etc.

    In reality, i now know that there are sum people that u simply click with - and effort doesnt come into it. The vast majority of people I find i have to 'try' with which can in some situations become a pain in the ass.

    Sorry if theres not much to go on there.


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