How passive-aggressive is this?

adastra · 04-07-2008 5:14pm #1

Hi guys, I started a thread here a little while ago about my boyfriend, and how he doesn't make any effort with me. I've been wondering whether I should just call it a day, and I think this confirms that he's a bit of a d**k...

This is a conversation over text that happened a little while ago:

HIM: wow you must be busy with yourself or somebody else

ME: why?...

HIM: well that just answered my question thank you

ME: whats wrong?

HIM: you tell me

ME: .....? if you're still angry about your bad day yesterday please don't take it out on my honey. I love you x

HIM: come again? you know what just forget i text you. have a nice day and text you when i'm home

....then after a few minutes, when I didn't reply to him....

HIM: oh one more thing, you can leave out the 'honey' and 'i love you' part next time

ME: ok, seriously.... what have i done?

HIM: nothing, dont worry, relax, as you say to me

ME: if i have done anything why are you in such a mood?

HIM: relax

This just came out of no where... It was the first thing he has text me all day, and I think it comes from the fact that I hadn't text him yet today. When I am at work I always text him first, when I am on my break in the morning, but as I am on holiday this week I was doing other stuff....

How childish is that? From a man of 37.... Just needed to vent:)

ntlbell · 04-07-2008 5:18pm

sounds more like he's about 15?

time to let this goldfish off the hook!

Ruu_Old · 04-07-2008 5:18pm

Tell him to grow up and stop being insecure.

Jumpy · 04-07-2008 5:18pm

Have you tried ringing him before putting up personal relationship information online?
I agree... very immature, but this is more looking for agreement to that point than a personal issue.

biko · 04-07-2008 5:20pm

Use the mouth piece of the phone rather than the keypad. Much better for (avoiding) fights.
edit - Jumpy bate me to it

WilmaRidesAgain · 04-07-2008 5:22pm

Hey OP,

I remember you deffo, you sound like you are in the "reviewing the situation" zone, yeh he is PA to the backbone, attention seeking git....i hope he is hot as f00k ....even if he is....is he worth the trouble.....?

nah!!

Maggie Simpson · 04-07-2008 5:25pm

adastra wrote: »

and I think this confirms that he's a bit of a d**k...

Yes it does.

Wibbs · 04-07-2008 5:26pm

OK not so sure about the personal info on here. Not a good plan. At all.

As for the problem? All I will say is everyone can have an off day, everyone can be moody. Obviously if someone is going through a hard time or is depressed then all bets are off, but IMHO a generally moody man is not a good bet.

chin_grin · 04-07-2008 5:29pm

Wow!

I know I could ask for the premise here (IE history of the text-convo), but I really don't need to.....like why didn't he just ring you in the first place? Looks like he was egging for a row to be honest, but in such a childish way. That's playground tactics at it's best.

He really is acting his shoe size!

r3nu4l · 04-07-2008 5:35pm

I would also have to say that text is such a ridiculous way to conduct oneself when there is a problem. Both he and you seem to be guilty of that.

This line:

ME: .....? if you're still angry about your bad day yesterday please don't take it out on my honey. I love you x

While you are right not to ask him to take his bad mood out on you, finishing with 'honey' followed by 'I love you x' reads very confusingly. That line seems quite passive-aggressive to me too!

It seems as though both of you need to talk not text.

In fact, I think a motto for PI should be 'Talk not Text'...or should that be 'tlk nt txt'. :rolleyes:

All of that said, his texts do appear to be insecure and juvenile but as I've said texting is not the way to make the relationship better...

DenMan · 04-07-2008 5:46pm

Hi OP

I know the golden rule of never talking about your ex, but is this his first relationship with a girl, because it sounds like it. I do agree with the other posters in saying he sounds very insecure and also immature. If that's what he is like over a text message I shudder to think what he is like in person.

HIM: "wow you must be busy with yourself or somebody else"

What exactly did he mean by that? Must have been very off putting and also very insulting.

fuzzywiggle · 04-07-2008 6:01pm

Wow 37? He should have more sense. He's picking a fight with you for no reason and who wants that?!

AngryBadger · 04-07-2008 6:56pm

Background?

Don't feel the need to comment on part of a text-conversaiton posted out of context.

MissHoneyBun · 04-07-2008 9:30pm

ntlbell wrote: »

time to let this goldfish off the hook!

:D:D:D
love it!

How passive-aggressive is this?

Comments