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Is this sexy

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13

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    #62
    r3nu4l
    Registered Users Posts: 17,399 ✭✭✭✭r3nu4l


    Finally getting another Trent update...hope there's some more SSRKK in this, dying to know what that leads to :)


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    #63
    Posy
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 27,534 Mod ✭✭✭✭Posy


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Don't forget the sound effects!
    That is a fantastic idea- although the sound effects will take thousands of dollars and a team of Hollywood experts to really bring them to life. :D

    -SKRRK! SKRRK SKRRK! Somehwere in the distance Trent could hear it. SKRRK! SKRRK! SKRRK! Trent could well remember that noise from the time he was in the army.

    -"Peeeow!" peeowed Trent making a noise like a gun shooting. "Peeow " to you too said the shopkeeper.

    -BANG! Trent shot the man dead! He fell on the floor like some shopping that hadn't been doubly bagged but there was heavy shopping in the bag, so the bag ripped.

    -CRACK! A noise went. CRACK! Like a mouse's spine breaking. Trent turned round at mouse height expecting to see one with a broke back.

    -Trent said the password and now the man was unlocking the door. KRRR-CLICK! KRRR-CLICK! KRR-CLICK! Actually, there was four locks. KRRR-CLICK!


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    #64
    KTRIC
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,463 ✭✭✭KTRIC


    Chuck Norris once met Trent, Chuck succumbed to his charm and turned gay just for that moment.


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    #65
    Ah_Yeah
    Registered Users Posts: 3,020 ✭✭✭Ah_Yeah


    Classic Trent!


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    #66
    Agent Weebley
    Registered Users Posts: 450 ✭✭Agent Weebley


    So, padraiggg . . .

    Tell us more about what's behind this smooth James Bondage exterior . . . what does mr sexington do after he has given the receptionist a tip from his coin purse. Does he ask her for the low-down on proper use of the fire hose . . . they are in a precarious position, being on the 177th floor, aren't they . . .

    After the sex and killing, what does he do for fun?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-OnyuJTm7s


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    #67
    bradknowell
    Registered Users Posts: 739 ✭✭✭bradknowell


    No. Just no. Sorry.


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    #68
    OldGoat
    Registered Users Posts: 12,633 ✭✭✭✭OldGoat


    --Kaiser-- wrote: »
    padraiggg, you should write a book. You will make millions
    There was a similar (Sorry Trent, I know you are the original, I'll take myself outside and beat myself to a pulpish pulp) collection of stories in the early 80's penned and inked in a pulp by Aidan Hughes and Malcom Bennett called "BRUTE!".

    Rare enough to find now but worth getting your hands on if you can.
    http://120units.blogspot.ie/2009/10/brute-by-malcolm-bennett-and-aidan.html

    http://blog.bruteprop.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/wpsc/product_images/brute6.jpg

    I'm older than Minecraft goats.



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    #69
    shane9689
    Registered Users Posts: 1,184 ✭✭✭shane9689


    OldGoat wrote: »
    There was a similar (Sorry Trent, I know you are the original, I'll take myself outside and beat myself to a pulpish pulp) collection of stories in the early 80's penned and inked in a pulp by Aidan Hughes and Malcom Bennett called "BRUTE!".

    Rare enough to find now but worth getting your hands on if you can.
    http://120units.blogspot.ie/2009/10/brute-by-malcolm-bennett-and-aidan.html

    http://blog.bruteprop.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/wpsc/product_images/brute6.jpg

    not the same though :/ its too formally written :l doesnt have the charming edge that is "Trent" :cool:


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    #70
    johnny_ultimate
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Arts Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 29,140 CMod ✭✭✭✭johnny_ultimate


    padraiggg wrote: »
    I heard that sexy books are interesting nowadays, what do you think of this


    A man in a hat went into a hotel, took his hat off and walked hatlessly up to the frontdesk.

    'Good morning mr Sexington' said the receptionist.

    Good morning siad Trent his eyes looking through her into her soul. There wasnt much there, just some vague dreams about nice dresses and rich men. Hahaha too easy thought Trent as he strode past her flexing his biceps so hard that his suit ripped and he nearly fainted.

    Can i take your suitcase said the woman? You can certainly try.. if it'll fit, said Trent, erotically eyeing her trouser front. Good grief thought the woman, her inner goddess put its deskfan on and wiped a bit of sweat from its lip.

    Trent ripped the suitcase forcefully from her grip and pushed powerfully past her into the lift. GOING DOWN? Said Trent as he handed her back the suitcase. even though it was up to the room.

    Her inner goddess held her back for a second but then Trents Windows-95-startup-screen blue eyes pulled her into the lift. With the help of his regional bodybuilding finalist-sized arms.

    BING! The lift got to the 177th floor penthouse... 'ladies first' said Trent holding the door open and smiling loudly... 'But men just before' he wittily added before gracefully and sexfully brushing past her.

    She followed him in, her brain and her pants contents aflame with desire and thinking...

    Microsoft puns! The subtext is inspiring!


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    #71
    padraiggg
    Registered Users Posts: 53 ✭✭padraiggg


    Things are relly hotting up now...



    Trent drew the curtains like a profesional then turned seducingly towards the woman but she was already seduced off the way he did the curtains! ROMANCE! Trent laid the woman on the bed neatly like tomorrows trousers then ripped his shirt off as if it hadnt even cost him €79.

    Trent advanced on the woman... "ROOM SERVICE" said the door, Trent kept advancing, the door opened, room service came in. Trent kept walking he was nearly there now. 'ROOM SERVICE' said the person in a cooler voice, it was a baddie! And he had got the girl! Aroused and angry, Trent quickly did snake arms kungfu into his shirt and pointed his advancing towards the baddy...

    You'll never smooch this broad again buddy! said the baddy. 'American. North American most likely' thought Trent. Trent was doing his cuffs up and didnt even look at him when he said' You must be of the New York baddy Group!" The man gasped and Trent drank a glass of whisky. "Liqor up said Trent' with no U and baseball threw the whisky glass on the mans head. HOME RUN.

    Trnt bundled the body into the minibar and turned back to the woamn. 'Did you mean what you said' said the woman? Trent raised an eyebrow both questioning and seducing her at the same time. 'Liqor up' you said, she said. Hahaha trent thought. Then Trent had sex with her.


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    #72
    Defiler Of The Coffin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,117 ✭✭✭Defiler Of The Coffin


    Fornication at last!


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    #73
    Sar_Bear
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,555 ✭✭✭Sar_Bear


    Yes! Bravo!


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    #74
    Orim
    Registered Users Posts: 4,971 ✭✭✭Orim


    Genius.

    I especially liked the way Trent matches the pronunciation of his witty quips to the ethnicity of his opponent.


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    #75
    hiDEhi
    Registered Users Posts: 71 ✭✭hiDEhi


    padraiggg wrote: »

    Trent laid the woman on the bed neatly like tomorrows trousers


    Brilliant.

    Pure Genius


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    #76
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I'm pregnant after reading that.






    And I'm still a man.


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    #77
    Red Hand
    Registered Users Posts: 4,986 ✭✭✭Red Hand


    Excellent stuff!


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    #78
    Musiconomist
    Registered Users Posts: 176 ✭✭Musiconomist


    Most of my orifices are literally weeping, figuratively.


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    #79
    JamieKCCO
    Registered Users Posts: 78 ✭✭JamieKCCO


    Trent has peeowed his way into my heart.

    'Hahaha, too easy' said Trent


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    #80
    hardCopy
    Registered Users Posts: 5,969 ✭✭✭hardCopy


    'American. North American most likely' thought Trent.

    Brilliant, such loltastic wordsmithery.


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    #81
    Fuzzytrooper
    Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 896 Mod ✭✭✭✭Fuzzytrooper


    I want to be like Trent when I grow up.


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    #82
    Rubecula
    Registered Users Posts: 8,551 ✭✭✭Rubecula


    Is Padraigg the Clark Kent to Trent's Superman? Can he change in a phone booth? These are the important questions we need to discuss. How else will mere mortals like ourselves ever learn the etiquette of such things without asking?


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    #83
    silvervixen84
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional Abroad Moderators Posts: 6,485 Mod ✭✭✭✭silvervixen84


    Who will play Trent in the movie adaptation?


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    #84
    Ah_Yeah
    Registered Users Posts: 3,020 ✭✭✭Ah_Yeah


    Fuzzytrooper wrote: »
    I want to be like Trent when I grow up.

    I want to be on Trent


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    #85
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I'd definitely turn gay for Trent. But he'd probably just shoot me afterwards.

    Pew pew pew hahahaha.


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    #86
    krankykitty
    Registered Users Posts: 1,518 ✭✭✭krankykitty


    Long live Trent! Just caught up with all his adventures today. Peeeww!


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    #87
    Hermy
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 11,313 Mod ✭✭✭✭Hermy


    silvervixen84 wrote: »
    Who will play Trent in the movie adaptation?

    Trent!

    Genealogy Forum Mod



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    #88
    me-skywalker
    Registered Users Posts: 3,339 ✭✭✭me-skywalker


    Trent v Liam in Taken: The Piss.


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    #89
    SeamusMoloney
    Registered Users Posts: 1 ✭SeamusMoloney


    God i wish i was Trent


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    #90
    Bigtoe107
    Registered Users Posts: 378 ✭✭Bigtoe107


    Just read this and it was made immesurably funnier by reading it in a Gilbert Gotfried voice ala


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    #91
    Jimmy Iovine
    Registered Users Posts: 9,416 ✭✭✭Jimmy Iovine


    I hope I'm not breaking any copyright laws by posting this but Padraiggg has been active on his Twitter account over the past few days. He posted up some tweets and they look like teasers for an upcoming chapter in his book. I had to share them.
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    Trent was in yet another hotel his business seemed to demand this often but he didn't mind he liked all you can eat breakfasts.
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    The names smith, JOHN smith saind Trent easily fooling the man and stifling a wink.
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    Trent went up to his room and put his tuxedos in the cupboard and his wetsuit and combat strikeforce gear.
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    Then he looked around the room hairdryer, teabags with strings on, television that didn't have the good channels. But something was missing.
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    INTERNATIONAL ESPIONAGE! Trent quickly opened the bathroom and a beautiful foreign agent with a heart of gold fell out.
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    Aha! Said Trent after some light wrestling over the little gun she had been planning to get him with.
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    An hour later the foriegn agent came out of the room except now she was covered in bruises and was a double agent now!
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    One more thing shouted the cheif. Shes there to be a weapons expert not seduced by your rogueish charm.The door closed silently behind Trent
    Padraiggg ‏@trenthahaha
    Goddammit said the cheif


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