BAD ROMANS I wrote a parody to Bad Romance

M5 wrote: »

OP i see you have this on aother website BTW


http://www.ladygaga.com/forum/default.aspx?cid=454&tid=404534

Matt Holck wrote: »

Bad Romans
(song to the Tune of Bad Romance)




Bad Romans
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!
talk about bad romans
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!
talk about bad romans

Et tu - , Brute
Carpe Diem
Adscriptus Glebae
O BAD ROMANS

Fluked Plumed Helmet!
hing banded armor!
Gla-adius !
the roman soldier

I want your vote in exchange for this bread
I'll join the Senate and soon will be head
I want your lot
lot lot lot
cast me your lot

judge our slave warriors with the thumb of your hand
watch fools get eaten by vicious lions
divert your thoughts
oh oh oh
forget your lot

(spoken)
you know that they had slaves
one third of the people
you know that they had ways
to keep them in shackles
I write on Bad, Bad Romans

vent your frustration in the coliseum
leave the power to the other men
I give you panem et circenses.
you and me could write on Bad Romans

grizzled scarecrows all along road (Whoa-0h---oh oh oh)
from Roma down to Capua
so the slave were shown the terrible toll (Whoa ho ho ho ho- oh oh oh)
if they disobeyed the ruler

Et tu - , Brute
Carpe Diem
veni, vidi, vici
O BAD ROMANS

returning warriors
saw the senate decline
people were cynical
on who held the reigns
Senators were shoved
shoved-shoved-shoved
Senators were shoved

offered protection
by Octavius.
who killed dissenters
while out in the sticks.
he wrote their laws
laws - laws-laws
their power lost

(spoken)
you know Antony lost it
while loving in Egypt
('Cause Rome was fascist baby!)
the cost for su-icide romance

He read Mark's will to the public forum
Antony's heirs weren't born Roman
Octavius used this as a means to an end
to preside over all Rome province

so control of Rome would now be honed (Whoa-0h---oh oh oh)
by one Emperor's hands
Octavius alone would own the shores (Whoa-0h---oh oh oh)
on the Mediterranean

Et tu - , Brute
Carpe Diem
veni, vidi, vici
O ROME LEGIONS

(spoken)
Wield, right, cohorts flank
reserves move up, fill the ranks
Hold center, as shields clank
shore the left with river banks
Walk, attack in formation
feeding off the conquered nations
Vercingetorix wrought starvation
Cross Liore, refresh the Legion
(That took Gaul! baby)


We attacked Carthage
We broke their shields
We enslaved their men
and we salted their fields

ave atque vale - (Hail and farewell!)
ad bellum Punicus - (to the Punic Wars)
Carthago delenda est - (Carthage must be destroyed)
so we salted their fields


Over a hundred ago, Rome defended her shores (Whoa-0h---oh oh oh)
from the Carthaginians
Rome had room to grow once they were gone (Whoa-0h---oh oh oh)
with colonial expansion


Empire Rulers (yelling)

the questions of (I want yur love)
su-uccessions (and I want your revenge)
made Emperors paranoid men

issued death orders (I want yur love)
on mothers and friends (and I want your revenge)
You and me could write a bad romans

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!
Write about bad Romans
(lot of of bad romans)
lot of of bad romans

Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!
They were bad romans
(lot of of bad romans)

Et tu - , Brute
Carpe Diem
veni, vidi, vici
O BAD ROMANS

Reg: All right, but apart from the sanitation, medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh water system and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?
Attendee: Brought peace?
Reg: Oh, peace - shut up!
Reg: There is not one of us who would not gladly suffer death to rid this country of the Romans once and for all.
Dissenter: Uh, well, one.
Reg: Oh, yeah, yeah, there's one. But otherwise, we're solid.