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29-06-2020, 01:04   #5716
armaghlad
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I tried one of those gimpy IPAs that every pretentious alternative/woke/hipster under the sun seems to be drinking these days. Absolute piss. Anyhoo ONE lukewarm tin is all I had and the farts coming out of me the next day were absolutely pungent, not too dissimilar to rotten fruit mixed with burnt rubber. I dread to think how a feed of this dishwater would affect a man’s excretory tract.
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29-06-2020, 10:41   #5717
Lewis_Benson
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Originally Posted by armaghlad View Post
I tried one of those gimpy IPAs that every pretentious alternative/woke/hipster under the sun seems to be drinking these days. Absolute piss. Anyhoo ONE lukewarm tin is all I had and the farts coming out of me the next day were absolutely pungent, not too dissimilar to rotten fruit mixed with burnt rubber. I dread to think how a feed of this dishwater would affect a man’s excretory tract.
Love a good IPA.
What the hell were you doing drinking it warm lad?
Into the fridge for a few hours before drinking.

Did no one ever show you how to chill a beer?
No wonder your gases would knock out a sewer worker, I'd say you don't know how to cook a decent meal for yourself.
Chilling beer is drinking 101 man.

Last edited by Lewis_Benson; 29-06-2020 at 10:47.
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29-06-2020, 11:00   #5718
armaghlad
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Love a good IPA.
What the hell were you doing drinking it warm lad?
Into the fridge for a few hours before drinking.

Did no one ever show you how to chill a beer?
No wonder your gases would knock out a sewer worker, I'd say you don't know how to cook a decent meal for yourself.
Chilling beer is drinking 101 man.
Wasn’t mine chap, my terrible host offered it to me. You know you can make your own IPA at home? Just mix some mi wadi and vinegar into out of date smithwicks and voila
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29-06-2020, 11:26   #5719
Lewis_Benson
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Wasn’t mine chap, my terrible host offered it to me. You know you can make your own IPA at home? Just mix some mi wadi and vinegar into out of date smithwicks and voila
I'm afraid that would taste awful dude.
You'll be firing out some scutter after that I can garuntee, call the shyte boys down at the waterworks before you unload that will you, its the decent thing to do.

I do however make my own IPA at home using a brew kit, have a brewed a few fine ales I must say.
I'm overdue a brew now actually.
Having just moved home, I may buy a 2nd keg and get 2 going.
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29-06-2020, 11:33   #5720
EmmetSpiceland
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You know you can make your own IPA at home? Just mix some mi wadi and vinegar into out of date smithwicks and voila
You forgot the tea bag.
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29-06-2020, 11:38   #5721
Lewis_Benson
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You forgot the tea bag.
Christ, I'd say even Shane McGowan wouldn't drink that.
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29-06-2020, 12:35   #5722
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Gonna be a "big" day today lads, I can feel it, deep down in my loins.

Saturday night, rang up Ali for one of his finest. Lamb Biryani, spicy curry sauce, king prawn butterfly, veg rolls and a COG naan. Immense feed to see out the night.

Then yesterday, a BBQ - in spite of a fúcking storm blowing outside. We're talking pork ribs with a spicy/sweet dry rub (2 huge thick racks) wings, drumsticks, thighs in buttermilk and sriracha, hot dogs made with kielbasa slaska & Tesco's finest thick hiney & mustard sausages, burgers, and to top it all off, a smoked pork belly, done low and slow. And of course, mac and cheese with candied bacon, egg salad, potato salad, and all the acoutrements

The Lord Blessus & indeed, Save us. The guests were wondering what was wrong with the floor last night, with my comments of "awful squeak in that floorboard there" to try and cover for the farts that were being produced.

How the duvet didn't achieve the Phileas Fog with all the hot air being produced last night, I'll never know...
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29-06-2020, 12:36   #5723
 
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Christ, I'd say even Shane McGowan wouldn't drink that.
Nothing he couldn't inject though to be fair.
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29-06-2020, 13:59   #5724
fuerte1976
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Talk to Joe has some dude complaining about a monster sh1te he found steaming in his underground carpark space..

Sound familiar?
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29-06-2020, 15:57   #5725
sligojoek
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Talk to Joe has some dude complaining about a monster sh1te he found steaming in his underground carpark space..

Sound familiar?
Was he a "Nordie"?
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29-06-2020, 17:23   #5726
Bobblehats
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Talk to Joe has some dude complaining about a monster sh1te he found steaming in his underground carpark space..

Sound familiar?
Was that the one the Gardaí made him take off his jumper and mop it up?
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29-06-2020, 19:20   #5727
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Considering the incident took place in Northern Ireland there will probably be accusations in Stormont that ‘them uns’ did it. Might put the peace process in jeopardy.
Well at least he didn't smear it on the wall



(or did he?)
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29-06-2020, 20:34   #5728
fuerte1976
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Was that the one the Gardaí made him take off his jumper and mop it up?
No, t'was another moaning f(ku on about a mess he discovered and was appalled with.

No sympathy for the poor individual that had to deliver the goods in a hurry ffs..
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29-06-2020, 20:34   #5729
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Was he a "Nordie"?
Nah, sounded like a D4 gimp that had paid a fortune for the parking space..
He must have had a bad dose of ire to be moaning the way he was..
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30-06-2020, 07:40   #5730
padd b1975
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Talk to Joe has some dude complaining about a monster sh1te he found steaming in his underground carpark space..

Sound familiar?
Should have been a complete non story.

Back in the day any council man worth his salt would be able to scoop her up with a single jab of the shovel, quick squirt of disinfectant and back into the hut before the kettle had boiled.

These days you're probably talking risk assessments, inspections, union interventions, engineers reports, multi level debriefs etc etc.
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