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02-12-2019, 10:04   #16
endacl
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I love the phrase ‘a monumental cheek’. Now I’m imagining a woman with half a massive arse.

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02-12-2019, 10:07   #17
splinter65
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I love the phrase ‘a monumental cheek’. Now I’m imagining a woman with half a massive arse.

She was actually quite well padded if you know what I mean!
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02-12-2019, 10:15   #18
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I like the idea of putting a bollard up. Obviously your mother has no intention of making problems for her neighbours, but this woman should have, as had been pointed out, at minimum asked your mother for permission before starting to park there, and come to some agreement where she would give times and her contact details. ****ty people seem to rely on others wanting to avoid confrontation.
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02-12-2019, 10:22   #19
El Tarangu
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My husband also points out that if anything happened the car on my mothers property she might be liable but I’m not sure about that.
I would be more worried about her tripping and falling getting in and out her car - your mother could be very much be liable for that.

Like another poster said - get a bollard. There are plenty of places for that lady to park, they just might involve a couple of minutes' walk, is all. While I am very sorry to hear about your mam's neighbour's situation, it doesn't preclude an able-bodied adult from turning up a a couple of minutes earlier to find a proper parking space, and walking for a couple of minutes.

Would it be possible for her to park on the public road in the entrance to the driveway? The driveway would be blocked, so same difference as regards the parking situation, but at least there wouldn't be a stranger traipsing around her property in the middle of the night, and all of the associated liability risks that this entails.
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02-12-2019, 10:36   #20
sportsfan90
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I'd be wary of the optics of things if you were to install a bollard. From her neighbours perspective, they have more important things to be worrying about than where the nurse parks her car. Yes the bollard sends out a very clear message to the nurse, but for the sake of keeping a good relationship with her neighbours, I'd try to think of something maybe less abrupt.

Btw I'm not excusing the nurse in this. She absolutely should have asked for permission first and then apologised to your mother.
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02-12-2019, 10:54   #21
tomwaits48
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There isn't a chance I would tolerate this and particularly if I thought someone was taking advantage of my elderly parent. I would find some way to block off the possibility of parking there, bollard, wheelie bin, let a courteous neighbour use the space instead for a while, anything than to allow such a presumptuous wagon continue with this.
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02-12-2019, 10:58   #22
splinter65
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There isn't a chance I would tolerate this and particularly if I thought someone was taking advantage of my elderly parent. I would find some way to block off the possibility of parking there, bollard, wheelie bin, let a courteous neighbour use the space instead for a while, anything than to allow such a presumptuous wagon continue with this.
Some people have absolutely no boundaries but for the sake of neighbourly relations we’d much prefer to let it go.
I’m fairly confident that if she tries it against anitger estate at the next house she goes to she’ll probably be sorry.
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02-12-2019, 11:02   #23
Mrs OBumble
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Btw I'm not excusing the nurse in this. She absolutely should have asked for permission first and then apologised to your mother.
For all we know, the nurse thinks that she was given permission, by a member of the neighbours family who had checked with the property owner. If this is the case then for the nurse to say "but I have to hear the permission with my own ears" would be demeaning for the dying person's family member.

The mother is not being inconvenienced or taken advantage of in any way. Her dying neighbour is being cared for. Just leave things alone for a week or two, and the biological solution will kick in.
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02-12-2019, 11:09   #24
tomwaits48
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For all we know, the nurse thinks that she was given permission, by a member of the neighbours family who had checked with the property owner. If this is the case then for the nurse to say "but I have to hear the permission with my own ears" would be demeaning for the dying person's family member.

The mother is not being inconvenienced or taken advantage of in any way. Her dying neighbour is being cared for. Just leave things alone for a week or two, and the biological solution will kick in.
That's actually better advice than mine!
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02-12-2019, 11:14   #25
splinter65
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For all we know, the nurse thinks that she was given permission, by a member of the neighbours family who had checked with the property owner. If this is the case then for the nurse to say "but I have to hear the permission with my own ears" would be demeaning for the dying person's family member.

The mother is not being inconvenienced or taken advantage of in any way. Her dying neighbour is being cared for. Just leave things alone for a week or two, and the biological solution will kick in.
She definitely doesn’t think she got permission from anyone. She said herself that when she drove down the street the first night (after 10 after my mother had gone to bed )that she looked at my mothers front and made a judgement that nobody lived there and in her mind that meant that she was free to drive her car into someone else’s property.
As long as you are happy to return from an afternoons shopping mrs obumble and find somebody parked in your driveway on the basis that they thought that nobody lived there then that’s up to you, but a lot of people would appreciate the courtesy of being asked first.
No mam is not being inconvenienced by her but she did get quite a fright the first morning. She has no parked for 3 nights.
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02-12-2019, 11:47   #26
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The mother is not being inconvenienced or taken advantage of in any way.
You and I have very different interpretations of "taking advantage of" someone's good will. There is no way in hell I'd be okay with somebody parking in my elderly relatives driveway without prior authorisation. I don't give a fiddler's fart what their reason for being in the estate is, that is just not okay in the slightest.

If they'd asked beforehand, then maybe. But even now, nobody from the sick house has come forward to ask and/or apologise? That would stick in my craw, and I make no apologies about it. I'd either park my own car across the end of the driveway blocking them in (forcing a showdown - "sorry, I wanted to park in my ma's driveway but couldn't") or I'd call the council to get it towed.
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02-12-2019, 12:01   #27
JustMe,K
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You and I have very different interpretations of "taking advantage of" someone's good will. There is no way in hell I'd be okay with somebody parking in my elderly relatives driveway without prior authorisation. I don't give a fiddler's fart what their reason for being in the estate is, that is just not okay in the slightest.

If they'd asked beforehand, then maybe. But even now, nobody from the sick house has come forward to ask and/or apologise? That would stick in my craw, and I make no apologies about it. I'd either park my own car across the end of the driveway blocking them in (forcing a showdown - "sorry, I wanted to park in my ma's driveway but couldn't") or I'd call the council to get it towed.
I don't think its for the patients relatives to seek permission for the nurse to park, or apologise on her behalf? The nurse is likely being paid by the family or provided by the medical team and just like any employee her transport and parking arrangements are not the issue of the people she is working for. The family likely dont know there has been a problem, nor should they.
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02-12-2019, 12:54   #28
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OP can you or some other family member or friend park there for a few days? The arrogance of this nurse is unacceptable. I would complain to her agency if you can find out which one she's from.
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02-12-2019, 13:06   #29
punisher5112
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Honestly I can't believe someone that cares for others would even dream of doing this....

Bizarre it is.

Understandably it's a frightening experience and something nobody should have to go through....

Even more so for an elderly woman at home alone.
It's very bad form and could really have someone worrying is someone watching the house or planning a break in etc.

If it were me I'd be having words with this woman or at the very least leave a note to never park there again as it was a frightening experience for her....
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02-12-2019, 13:12   #30
$hifty
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I don't think its for the patients relatives to seek permission for the nurse to park, or apologise on her behalf? The nurse is likely being paid by the family or provided by the medical team and just like any employee her transport and parking arrangements are not the issue of the people she is working for. The family likely dont know there has been a problem, nor should they.
If the family are living/sleeping here temporarily and this has caused an increased amount of traffic in an otherwise relatively quiet estate, you bet your ass they're aware of the parking, or lack thereof, as they themselves will encounter difficulties in wherever they park their own cars. (If it was my family, I'd have gone out of my way to make sure the nurse had parking - I'd move my own car somewhere else and let the nurse park in the drive, if required........an ill member of the household does not give you a free pass to act the dick).

I'm sure they have a load on their plate, but bottom line is OP's mam should have been consulted and her permission requested before someone plonked their motor in her feckin driveway.
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